THE LIVING YOGI

Sri Sri Sri Shivabalayogi Maharaj

with the chapter omitted from the original publication

compiled and written by:

Thomas L. Palotas

published by:

Shivabalayogi Seva Foundation

photographs:

from Sri Swamiji’s personal collection, courtesy of the trustees of the Sri Shivabalayogi Maharaj Trust, Bangalore, and from the author’s own collection

originally published in 1995 by:

Sri Shivabalayogi Maharaj Trust

1/A, Phase 3, J. P. Nagar, Bangalore 560-078, India

cover design:

R. Nelson

Nelson Advertising Pvt. Ltd., Bangalore

© 1995, 2013, Shivabalayogi Seva Foundation

P.O. Box 64634, Tucson, AZ 85728, U.S.A.

www.shivabalayogi.org

CONTENTS

Introductions

Forwards by Bangalore Trustees

Author’s Introduction

A Garland of 108 Names

The Life of Shivabalayogi

Mahasamadhi

I Am with You Always (Devotees’ Experiences since the Mahasamadhi)

Darshan (Conversations with Sri Swamiji through Bhava Samadhi)

Supplemental Introduction: Controversy and Bhava Samadhi

The Omitted Chapter: More Experiences with Bhava Samadhi

Glossary

INTRODUCTIONS

Forewords by Bangalore Trustees

SRI SHIVABALAYOGI MAHARAJ TRUST

INTERNATIONAL CENTER FOR INDIAN CULTURE

1/A, Phase 3, J. P. Nagar, Bangalore 560-078, India

CHAIRMAN:

T. LAKSHMIKANTAMMA

Mr. Thomas L. Palotas, the author of this book, The Living Yogi, is an ardent devotee of Sri Sri Sri Shivabalayogi Maharaj. This book is an earnest effort on his part to know, to understand, to analyse the ways of working of Swamiji with or without his physical presence. By the grace of the Guru with whom he was closely associated, Swamiji has given him a deep understanding of the way the guru works at different places with devotees, blessing them, loving them, empowering them spiritually, working through them, carrying forward his mission. Indeed, it is very difficult for many to understand a Yogi. To the best of his ability, subtle understanding, devotion and love for the Guru he has been able to bring out many facets of Swamiji’s power and present it to the benefit of the devotees and readers.

For a world enthralled in violence, destruction, narrowness, hatred, bitterness, Swamiji’s self crucification should be an eye opener. A rare opportunity of His presence in this world was missed. But the light will shine forever. Meditation and God realization are the paths that Swamiji has shown us and it is for us to benefit from His guidance.

For Tom, as he is affectionately called, this is his second effort, the first being Tapas Shakti. May he write many more books on Swamiji and may Swamiji’s blessings be always with him.

T. Lakshmikantamma

SRI SHIVABALAYOGI MAHARAJ TRUST

INTERNATIONAL CENTER FOR INDIAN CULTURE

1/A, Phase 3, J. P. Nagar, Bangalore 560-078, India

TRUSTEE TREASURER:

M. B. RAMARADHYA

AUM

It is indeed a great honour in associating with the publication of this great book The Living Yogi. The most apt title was given by Sri Sri Sri Shivabalayogi Maharaj Himself in trance on a devotee. He is very much alive and He is The Living Yogi.

This book is compiled and edited by Mr. Thomas L. Palotas of Seattle, U.S.A., who is associated with Sri Swamiji since nearly one decade.

It is very difficult to understand a yogi. It is also not known how, where and when a yogi’s blessings work.

The Living Yogi is a continuation of the book Tapas Shakti compiled by the same author.

I humbly pray to Sri Sri Sri Shivabalayogi Maharaj to bless the author, all devotees and all readers who read this book.

I thank Mr. Thomas L. Palotas on behalf of the Trust for all the efforts he had to put in to bring out the greatest book of our times.

M. B. Ramaradhya

SRI SHIVABALAYOGI MAHARAJ TRUST

INTERNATIONAL CENTER FOR INDIAN CULTURE

1/A, Phase 3, J. P. Nagar, Bangalore 560-078, India

TRUSTEE SECRETARY:

K. M. BABU RAO

SRI GURUVENAMAHA

The Living Yogi compiled and edited by Mr. Thomas L. Palotas is the mighty manifestation of Sri Sri Sri Shivabalayogi Maharaj’s power, with or without His physical presence.

In these days of religion merging into mysticism, metaphysics and philosophy, Guru’s guidance is the deeply desired inner need of every human being. Mr. Thomas L. Palotas and his wife Pat Templeman are beneficiaries of Swamiji’s affection in abundance with profusion. The Living Yogi in this book form is the result of Swamiji’s blessings on them.

His Holiness Sri Sri Sri Shivabalayogi Maharaj may continue to give the inspiration and insights to Mr. Thomas L. Palotas to come out with many more books on Swamiji, so that Swamiji’s mission continues and benefits of the mission reaches out to everyone in the world.

K. M. Babu Rao

Author’s Introduction

Two days after the exhausting events which culminated in the mahasamadhi in Adivarapupeta, I was back at the Bangalore ashram. I had been traveling two days and arrived late in the morning. I decided to take a bath and as I was returning to my room, Rajguru Tambre came running. “Tom, Tom! Swamiji is calling you.” My only thought was whether I had time to get dressed.

I ran to Sri Swamiji’s rooms and there in his puja room was Miss K. Yashoda in Swamiji’s bhava. Her fingers were bent in the same posture as Swamiji’s and she was gently swaying side to side. I went before Swamiji and did a pranam. It never occurred to me to question his presence. He spoke in Telugu and his comments were translated for my benefit.

“Be calm. Blessings. Blessings to the American devotees. Be calm. When Pat comes, she can stay here for a while. Don’t worry. What did you think of the mahasamadhi?”

The reference to Pat’s arrival was a surprise. I had told no one about Pat’s plans to join me in India. Asking my opinion about the mahasamadhi was curious. It had been most difficult. Sri Swamiji in this form continued talking. He gave instructions that all four trustees of his Oregon trust were to come to India and visit the Samadhi in Adivarapupeta.

So began my life with Sri Swamiji after his mahasamadhi. He continued to come in bhava upon Miss Yashoda for the next several nights, each time giving devotees guidance and assurances of his continued presence. He gave detailed instructions for the Trust, the construction of a Samadhi shrine in Bangalore, and the arrangements to bring his jata (matted hair) from Adivarapupeta to Bangalore.

During one of these evening ashram meetings with several devotees, Sri Swamiji said that he would like a book published about his mahasamadhi. He said it should contain three parts: his 108 names; his life history; and a detailed account of his mahasamadhi and what has been happening since. He asked for volunteers. After a dignified opportunity for someone else to come forward, I offered.

Sri Swamiji asked me how quickly could I do it. I asked for more information. He explained that the life history was not to be a copy of what is already written. It should briefly summarize, and could include material which was not in Tapas Shakti, Swamiji’s biography which was published in 1991. The account of Swamiji’s mahasamadhi should be in detail and incorporate the views of different devotees, with two or three alternative explanations and theories. Again Sri Swamiji asked me how quickly I could get it done. It had to be done very quickly, he said. He wanted it ready for distribution on the fourteenth of April, less than two weeks away.

A draft was ready by the twelfth, and that night I read it to Sri Swamiji who was in bhava upon Miss Yashoda. It was after the evening bhajans in the meditation hall and some twenty devotees were sitting around Swamiji in the back of the hall. D. Jagadish Kumar translated for Swamiji as I summarized what had been written and asked if I had it right. Sri Swamiji nodded as if approving and when we got to the description of the mahasamadhi ceremonies in Adivarapupeta, He asked me, “Did you get the part about the rain?”

“Yes Swamiji,” I responded, knowing that the unusual rain on the morning of the mahasamadhi meant the presence of a yogi.

Then Swamiji asked, “Did you get the rain in Bangalore?”

Again I replied “Yes Swamiji.” The book described how it had rained in Bangalore on that same Good Saturday. I was pleased that the draft already included these important details.

Then Swamiji asked, “Did you get the light?”

“What light?” I did not know what he was talking about.

One of the women sitting with us listening to our book review spoke up. “There was a light in Adivarapupeta that morning. Several people saw it come down from the sky, touch the ground before the Dhyana Mandir, then go inside.” I started writing notes wondering why people waited so long to tell me.

“Did you get the light in Bangalore?”

“There’s another light?” I said excitedly. Rajguru Tambre, sitting next to me, spoke up. His children had seen the light and he started to explain how on the day of the mahasamadhi in Adivarapupeta, they saw an unusual bright light in the Bangalore ashram which covered the four acre site then focused in the middle of the garden at the grove of rudraksha trees. Inside that grove, eight days later, a second Samadhi shrine was consecrated.

The book needed more work and there was not enough time to get it in print. I continued to rewrite, collect material and experiences, and reflect, taking every opportunity to talk with other devotees about their thoughts. Meanwhile, Sri Swamiji himself suggested its title, The Living Yogi.

A few days after that first darshan of Shivabalayogi on Miss Yashoda, the four Oregon trustees arrived. After the Bangalore Samadhi was consecrated on April 10, the five of us Americans traveled to Adivarapupeta, then to Hyderabad, Delhi and Dehradun. Three of us went to Agra where on Sunday, May 1, we had darshan of Sri Swamiji in shakti rupa upon Mr. M. P. Singh. Sri Swamiji in this form talked for more than four hours answering pointed questions about his mahasamadhi and explaining his continued presence in full power. Much of the question and answer material in this book is taken from that darshan. Sri Swamiji instructed me to return to the United States and collect experiences there before the book would be ready.

Later that month of May, after I had returned to Bangalore from North India, Sri Swamiji asked if the trustees would invite Mr. R. B. Singh and Mr. D. Jagadish Kumar to the United States, preferably within a few months. The tour was arranged over the next few months and special meditation and bhajan programs organized across the country and in England and Germany in October, November and December of 1994. Sri Swamiji came upon Mr. R. B. Singh in full shakti rupa and was present at each of the programs and Mr. Kumar translated Sri Swamiji’s native Telugu into English. The experiences of those who attended these programs were profound. We also had lots of opportunity to talk with Sri Swamiji and ask questions, and this material also forms a large part of the question and answer chapter of this book.

—  —

There are many wonderful people whose ideas, insights, devotion, stories and experiences influenced how this book was written. In Kakinada, Sri K. Gopanna was our guide and his wonderful family our hosts. In Adivarapupeta Sri Ramlingeshwa Rao Kalakanda and his family, Hindi Master, and so many others inspired us with their love and service. Sri Ramakrishna Rao shared many wonderful stories with me about traveling with Sri Swamiji in the early days and we trust that he is now closer to Sri Swamiji than ever before. All the devotees in and about Adivarapupeta deserve special mention and I regret that it is not possible to mention each individually.

In Bangalore, our deepest thanks to Smt. Laxmikantamma for her thoughtful and constructive comments and for her help in translating Sanskrit. Thanks also to Dr. D. Sivarajeshwari Devi and her brother, Mr. D. Jagadish Kumar, for their insightful perspectives, and to the family of Mr. Vittal G. Tambre, especially Motilal and Rajguru Tambre. Mrs. Capt. Baldev (Krishna) Singh, shared her experiences as did Smt. Laxmikantamma, Miss K. Yashoda, Col. and Mrs. Raj Ahlawat, Mr. Ramaradhya and Mr. D. S. Walia of Delhi. Dr. P. N. Murthy in Hyderabad and Brig. Gen. Hanut Singh in Dehradun, both of whom have written about Sri Swamiji and his mission, gave invaluable and calm insight and encouragement. Sri Srinivasa Dixit, our gracious host at the Dehradun ashram whose love, dedication and rich experiences of our beloved Swamiji, is an inspiration for all devotees.

The commitment and discipline of devotees like M. P. Singh, R. B. Singh and many other devotees now and over the last three decades make it possible for Sri Swamiji to be with us in full power. What Sri Swamiji can do with that presence has to be experienced, although we hope that reading this book gives some small indication. As time goes on and Sri Swamiji continues to be with us through bhava, more and more people will recognize the great spiritual qualities of these and other disciples whom Sri Swamiji blesses with his shakti rupa.

Pat Templeman is a most supportive critic and she chose the photographs which grace these pages. Karen Morell patiently corrected the English in my drafts, so whatever mistakes the reader finds come from my later revisions. Mr. R. Nelson and Sri. K. M. Babu Rao work miracles publishing materials for Sri Swamiji, and we all owe them a great debt for their tireless and selfless efforts. Our thanks also for the support of the trustees of Sri Swamiji’s Trust in India, whose encouragement and gracious loan of Sri Swamiji’s personal papers and photograph collection in large measure helped make this book. The trustees of Sri Swamiji’s Trusts in Oregon, North Carolina and England also gave me great encouragement, and we must thank all the devotees who contributed great and small to the work of making Sri Swamiji’s blessings and meditation available to the public.

The inspiration, intuition and insights of so many people are all through the divine grace of His Holiness, Sri Sri Sri Shivabalayogi Maharaj.

Thomas L. Palotas

Seattle, December 15, 1994

Bangalore, January 28, 1995

Adivarapupeta, February 1, 1995

A GARLAND OF 108 NAMES

SHATHA-ASHTOTHARA NAMAVALI

The 108 Names or Mantras of Sri Sri Sri Shivabalayogi Maharaj [1]

aum sri maha ganadhipataye namaha

Salutations to the Great God Ganapati, the Leader of the Ganas. [2]

shuklam baradharam vishnum chaturvarnam chaturbhujam.

sri sri sri shivabalayogishwara namaha

Salutations to the One Who is clothed in white, Whose body is white, and Who is many colored and has four hands, the Lord of Yogis devoted to Lord Shiva and Goddess Parvati [3]

gurur brahma gurur vishnu gurur devo maheshwara

guru sakshat parabrahma tasmai sri guravenamaha

dhyana mulam guror murthi

puja mulam guror padam

mantra mulam guror vakyam

moksha mulam guror kripaa

The Guru is the personification of Brahma, Vishnu and Maheshwara.

He himself is Parabrahma, the Highest God. Salutations to my Guru.

The object of dhyana is the Guru’s form.

The object of worship is the Guru’s feet.

The object of mantra is the Guru’s word.

Liberation is had only through the Guru’s grace.

sri sri sri shivabalayogindra sadgurave namaha

Salutations to Sri Sri Sri Shivabalayogi, the true Guru. [4]

1.  aum sri shivabalayogidevaya namaha

Om salutations to Shivabalayogi Who is Divine

2.  aum balaishaya namaha

Om salutations to the Child Shiva

3.  aum parabrahma swarupaya namaha

Om salutations to the Highest God [5]

4.  aum atma tejo rupaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who is the form of soul and light

5.  aum sarvendriya swadhinaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who has all senses at Your command

6.  aum apara ishaya namaha

Om salutations to the Lord of creation [6]

7.  aum sakala sadgunaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who has all good qualities

8.  aum gnana bhaskaraya namaha

Om salutations to the Sun of Knowledge

9.  aum yoga nishtaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who is always in yoga [7]

10.  aum akhanda tejo murtaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who has an infinitely brilliant light form

11.  aum atma bodhanandaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who teaches the science of happiness

12.  aum sarva bhootendriyaya namaha

Om salutations to the One who is in the Lord of the organs of all living beings [8]

13.  aum ardhanarishwara swarupaya namaha

Om salutations to the All Who is both male and female [9]

14.  aum shanta swarupaya namaha

Om salutations to the Manifestation of Peace

15.  aum shashidhara shyamala rupaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who wears the moon with calm composure

16.  aum dashendriyananda bharitaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who fills all ten organs with complete happiness

17.  aum dashavidha rupaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who manifests in ten forms

18.  aum nirguna parabrahmane namaha

Om salutations to the Lord Who is beyond all qualities

19.  aum gnanodayandaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who finds happiness in revealing knowledge

20.  aum vishwa shanti pradhanaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who bestows peace on the world

21.  aum bhakta rakshanaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who protects Your devotees

22.  aum sarva vyapine namaha

Om salutations to the One who is all pervading

23.  aum sarva jnaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who is the Knower of everything

24.  aum taposagara dhiraya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who has valiantly crossed the ocean of tapas

25.  aum paripurnanandaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who is in perfect bliss

26.  aum divyanandaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who is immersed in Divine happiness

27.  aum bhrumadhya sancharaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who is present between our eyebrows

28.  aum jyotirmayakaraya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who makes the light form

29.  aum padmasanaya namaha

Om salutations to the One seated in the lotus posture [10]

30.  aum sathya shanta bhushanalankaraya namaha

Om salutations to the One adorned with the jewels of Truth and Peace

31.  aum taraka yoganandaya namaha

Om salutations to the One in the combined form of Lord Shiva and Lord Rama. [11]

32.  aum atmatatva parishodhanaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who explores of the depths of the Soul

33.  aum satchidanadaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who is pure Existence, Consciousness and Bliss

34.  aum kalusha haraya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who removes the impurities in us

35.  aum karana janmaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who has taken birth for a purpose

36.  aum nirvikalpaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who is beyond ego consciousness

37.  aum mounamudraya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who is the form of silence

38.  aum mahayoga purushaya namaha

Om salutations to the Man Who is a Great Yogi

39.  aum vishva rakshaya namaha

Om salutations to the Protector of the world

40.  aum gyanabodhaya namaha

Om salutations to the Teacher of Knowledge

41.  aum taposiddhaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who attained powers through tapas

42.  aum suravinutaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who is praised by the gods

43.  aum aikya swarupaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who attained union with God

44.  aum ananta sagaraya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who is an infinite ocean

45.  aum ananta shubhapradaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who is the Giver of infinite prosperity

46.  aum dosha nashaya namaha

Om salutations to the Destroyer of our faults

47.  aum daasa poshaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who takes care of Your servants

48.  aum parama purushaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who is God Himself

49.  aum loka pavanaya namaha

Om salutations to the Purifier of the world

50.  aum ananda lila swarupaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who is the form of blissful play

51.  aum avatara yogi pungavaya namaha

Om salutations to the Incarnation of the greatest Yogi

52.  aum parameswara sambhutaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who has attained unity with the Highest God

53.  aum paripurnanandaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who has total bliss

54.  aum deva devanandaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who is the God of gods

55.  aum paapa samharaya namaha

Om salutations to the Destroyer of sin

56.  aum param jyoti darshanaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who has seen the Divine Light

57.  aum achala paripurnanandaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who has unfailing, complete happiness

58.  aum pavithra suguna bhushitaya namaha

Om salutations to the One adorned with good qualities

59.  aum surya mandala praveshaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who has entered into the world of the Sun

60.  aum ashrita jana paripalanaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who protects those who take refuge in Him

61.  aum veda vedyaya namaha

Om salutations to the Propounder of all the Vedas [12]

62.  aum chaturvidha moksha phalapradaya namahA

Om salutations to the Giver of four kinds of liberation

63.  aum nitya nirmalaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who is ever pure

64.  aum sujana parijathaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who is the Divine Flower of all good people

65.  aum bhakti jnana nirupaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who establishes and proves devotion and knowledge

66.  aum shiva narayanavataraya namaha

Om salutations to the Avatar of Shiva and Narayana

67.  aum swayam prakashaya namaha

Om salutations to the Self-Luminous One

68.  aum brahma jnana swarupaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who is the form of the Knowledge of Brahma

69.  aum shuddha vairagya veeraya namaha

Om salutations to that Lord Who is the pure, staunch, detached One

70.  aum atma sakshatkaraya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who has realized the Soul

71.  aum ananda paramanandaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who is Happiness and Divine Bliss

72.  aum karma vinashanaya namaha

Om salutations to the Destroyer of karma

73.  aum jiva brahmaikya sandayakaya namaha

Om salutations to the one Who is the Cause of unity between the soul and the Supreme Soul

74.  aum sadananda shashvitanandaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who is always happy and ever blissful

75.  aum nirakara paratparaya namaha

Om salutations to the Formless and Highest Lord

76.  aum ragadvesha khanditaya

Om salutations to the Destroyer of love and hate

77.  aum moksha pradaya namaha

Om salutations to the Giver of liberation

78.  aum brahmananda bharitaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who is always filled with great Bliss

79.  aum divya dristi prabhavaya namaha

Om salutations to the Opener of Divine Sight

80.  aum maheshwara leelavataraya namaha

Om salutations to the Incarnation of Lord Shiva’s Divine Play

81.  aum tapo nishta garishtaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who is the master of the discipline of tapas

82.  aum sankalpa rahitaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who is free of any desire

83.  aum parama purushaya namaha

Om salutations to the Divine Man

84.  aum triloka pujyaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who is worshipped in the three worlds

85.  aum triguna rahitaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who is devoid of the three qualities [13]

86.  aum bhaktha sulabhaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who is easily attained with devotion

87.  aum brahmacharine namahA

Om salutations to the One Who is celibate

88.  aum bhakthajana priyaya namaha

Om salutations to the Beloved of His devotees

89.  aum punyatmane namaha

Om salutations to the One Who has a virtuous soul

90.  aum shranagata vatsalaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who has pity for those who seek Your protection

91.  aum sahasrara kamala darshanaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who has realized the thousand petalled lotus

92.  aum yoganandaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who is in the bliss of yoga

93.  aum sarvabhista vara prasadaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who blesses us with whatever we want

94.  aum sarvayantra vidharanaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who is the embodiment of all the machinery of the Universe[14]

95.  aum jaganmayaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who is the illusory effect of the world

96.  aum sarvatmane namaha

Om salutations to the One Who is the Soul in everyone

97.  aum deena bandheya namaha

Om salutations to the Protector of the poor and the unhappy

98.  aum sthitha pragnaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Who is stable minded [15]

99.  aum sarvendriyananda bharitaya namaha

Om salutations to the One Whose senses are full of Bliss forever

100.  aum chidananda vigrahaya namaha

Om salutations to the Personification of Divine Bliss

101.  aum sarva dushtagrahanashine namaha

Om salutations to the Destroyer of the planets’ evil influences

102.  aum srusti sthithilaya karanaya namaha

Om salutations to the Cause of creation, protection and destruction

103.  aum sarva roga haraya namaha

Om salutations to the Destroyer of disease

104.  aum sarva dukha nivaraya namaha

Om salutations to the Remover of all sorrow

105.  aum sarva vidya phala pradaya namaha

Om salutations to the Bestower of the fruit of all knowledge

106.  aum sarva mantra swarupanye namaha

Om salutations to the One Who is the form of all the mantras

107.  aum sarva mangala shubha pradaya namaha

Om salutations to the Giver of prosperity

108.  aum sri shiva bala yogindraya namaha

Om salutations to Sri Shivabalayogi, King of Yogis

aum shantih shantih shantih

Om, peace, peace, peace

THE LIFE OF SHIVABALAYOGI

Sri Swamiji and his mother, Parvatamma Allaka. Photo taken in Madras, 1965.

Sri Sri Sri Shivabalayogi Maharaj, having attained God and self realization through samadhi and tapas, is a yogi. Therefore, to begin to understand Shivabalayogi requires a little knowledge about samadhi, tapas and yogis. Samadhi can be translated as enlightenment or God consciousness. It is any of several very advanced states of spiritual consciousness in which a person is so immersed in divine bliss that there is no awareness of the physical body or time. A person who experiences samadhi, said Swamiji, will want to remain in that blissful state until the ego is completely mastered and Self realization is attained. That process of spiritual purification or penance is called tapas. Shivabalayogi defined tapas as meditation in samadhi for at least twelve hours every day for many years, usually twelve. The person who successfully completes tapas becomes a yogi, and true yogis are rare.

From time to time, God calls a great cosmic being to descend into the world to perform great tapas and acquire spiritual powers for the benefit of the world. The Guru who guides these wonderful souls through tapas is not a physically embodied master but God directly. Such is the case with Buddha, Jesus and Mohammed. These perfectly unselfish souls dedicate themselves to public service for all people without regard to religion or status. They are the universal teachers who lift the suffering out of ignorance and darkness to restore the eternal truth of how people should live their lives. Like divine mothers and fathers, the great masters draw their children to God and transform lives by the loving power of their presence. These sublimely divine beings are God’s perfect agents.

Shivabalayogi’s life is an amazing example of perfect selflessness. He did not undergo tapas for any personal desire, not even the desire to attain bliss or realization. Shivabalayogi did tapas simply because God so instructed him. He underwent twelve unusually intense and extremely difficult years of tapas with hardly a murmur, and when the tapas was completed, his only personal request was for his Divine Guru’s instructions on what he should do next.

Shivabalayogi’s Divine mission is unusually public and broad in scope. We have few details about the tapas of most yogis, yet Shivabalayogi’s was extremely public. Many tens of thousands witnessed Shivabalayogi doing tapas over twelve years and a vast crowd was present when he emerged from his tapas on August 7, 1961. The self realized prefer to quietly draw their disciples away from the confusion and ignorance of public life, and many yogis remain completely hidden. Unlike other yogis, Shivabalayogi allows all devotees to be close to him, no matter whether they are the poorest or the richest in the eyes of the world. He has extensively by car, train and airplane throughout India and the West. With other masters, initiation is a very rare blessing reserved for disciples who have demonstrated their spiritual merit. Shivabalayogi initiates all who seek into dhyana[16] meditation regardless of the person’s spiritual merit or experience. Before he left his physical body, Shivabalayogi had given initiation to over ten million people.

Shivabalayogi came to our troubled modern world to demonstrate and teach the path of practical spirituality to all people. His only verbal teaching was that people should know the truth through their own experience, and he promoted the regular practice of meditation in order to live more effectively in the world. He constantly radiated blessings, helping people concentrate their own minds and deepening their meditation experiences. Through meditation, we reduce tensions in ourselves and in those around us. The quality of our lives improves. We discover our purpose, and we can understand others better. There is too much tension in the world, Shivabalayogi often warned, and we have created a very dangerous situation through nuclear proliferation, environmental damage and social disintegration. Through the individual practice of meditation, we can reduce that tension. Meditation is practical spirituality and it has to do with happiness in this world.

In the ancient Bhrigu Nadi[17], Sage Bhrigu describes the mission of Sri Sri Sri Shivabalayogi Maharaj and the difficult times in which he is to be born.

He seeks for the Divine solution to save mankind. He endeavors to bring peace out of the malefic aspects of planets and by the virtue and Grace of Lord Shiva,[18] he sees the Divine Light. He becomes regarded as God’s reflection on earth and is worshipped by saints. It was an unusual combination of planets that brought forth the catastrophe of Kurukshetra and its evils which brought untold suffering to humanity.[19] No less evil a combination confronts the world today and he comes to the rescue of mankind to save them from its evil effects. He comes to teach the truth of God and the virtues of worshipping God, and his fame resounds in every quarter of the world. …

To see the entire universe, to take a holy bath in all the shrines, to acquire proficiency in every field of knowledge, and to relinquish all desires are child’s play to him. This boy is God’s messenger to propagate the message of God for world peace. God has given him the power of tapas as a means to protect the world. Lord Shankara[20] Himself will perform and fulfill several functions at the word of this boy Yogi.

In the ancient Kumar Nadi, Kumarswamy describes to his Divine Mother, Parvati, the service for which Shivabalayogi was born and did tapas.[21]

For this soul there is no family life, wife or children. This world is his family. The people are his children. He will look after all the families, throughout the day and night. He will have to look after the life which lives inside stone,[22] and he must give life to the seed which lies in the nutshell. He must look after the soul which lies in the womb of the mother. He will have to give boons to whoever requests them. When the gods get into difficulties, he has to assist them. Even Yama, the god of death who takes away the souls from the body, even Yama has time to rest.[23] But Swamiji[24] can have no time to rest.

The nadis say Shivabalayogi is Sanaka, who with Sananda, Sanatana and Sanatkumara are the four mind-born sons of Brahma, God the Creator. These four boys did powerful tapas to become child yogis (balayogis) with all the powers and responsibility of creation. Untold millions of years pass for each cycle of cosmic creation and dissolution, and in each cycle one of these four balayogis assumes the responsibility of protecting and guiding creation and all its beings. In this cycle it is Sanaka who keeps incarnating over and over again to serve not only all the people of this world, but of all the worlds.

Sanaka’s first incarnation in this cycle is Ganesha, the elephant-headed lord of all the forces of creation, a task of cosmic magnitude. Even the gods must first seek Ganesha’s blessings before undertaking any activity in this creation. Shivabalayogi discourages discussions about past lives, instead reminding people that what is important is what is done in this life. Yet he privately admitted on several occasions that he is Ganesha.

The nadis say the child born to become Shivabalayogi also took birth as Sukabrahma, one of the Seven Rishis. He is the guardian of the spiritual eye of the Holy Spirit, Lord Shiva, and he is in charge of all the Holy Scriptures, the Vedas. Before an assembly of all the deities, God realized souls, and celestial beings, Lord Shiva asked the Seven Rishis, “Which one would take birth in the world to preach philosophy and enlightenment?” Nobody answered because nobody wanted to take a human body and suffer. Only Sukabrahma Rishi agreed to take birth as human being and serve the human race.

This physical world is a difficult place. The illusion of creation is so strong that great tapas and divine blessings are necessary to acquire the strength of mind to discriminate the real from the unreal and see the divine play in all things. No great soul would want to incarnate here voluntarily, and often in response to devotees’ questions about death, Swamiji would jest that once the soul is liberated from the body, it has no desire to return. Yet great souls do descend and incarnate, not for themselves but for the love and service of all people and life in the world.

The nadis identify over a hundred other prior births of this great soul, and occasionally Shivabalayogi privately confirmed the accuracy of these lists. Sri Swamiji took birth and completed tapas as Lord Buddha, Jesus Christ and Mohammed.[25] The life of Shivabalayogi is the culmination and perfection of a cycle of thirty-two births which include Jnaneshwara, Tulsidas, Namdev, Kabir, Jai Chandra, Shivaji, Sri Chandra, Arjuna Dev, Ramakrishna Paramahansa, Lahiri Mahasaya and Nityananda. The latter three should be well known in the West as they are the yogis after whom the Vedanta Society (founded by Vivekananda), Self Realization Fellowship (which Yogananda started) and Siddha Yoga (of Mukhtananda) were founded.

Shivabalayogi comes to our troubled modem world to demonstrate and teach all people the path of practical spirituality. His twelve years of unusually arduous and intense spiritual penance are an example of the need to practice spirituality. His only verbal teaching is that people should meditate in dhyana regularly, preferably at least an hour every day. He is constantly radiating blessings to all those who would take them, helping people concentrate their own minds and deepening their meditation experience.

The purpose of meditation is to lose body consciousness and become aware of the spiritual reality underlying all creation. Through regular meditation, we can improve the quality of our lives, discover our purpose, and understand others better. There is too much tension in the world, Shivabalayogi warns, and we have created a very dangerous situation through nuclear proliferation, environmental damage and social disintegration. Only through the individual practice of meditation can we contribute to the solution. We must incorporate a practical spirituality in our lives. We must practice spirituality.

Shivabalayogi tells us that a person’s meditation can drive away the darkness of the world just like the light from a single lamp (jyoti) drives away the darkness. Even if only one person does meditation, the darkness is dispelled. If the meditation of a single person is this powerful, then the light from the meditation of every person will completely transform this world into a place of indescribable peace, happiness and understanding for all.

Sathyaraju

The Balayogi in December of 1949, four months after he began tapas.

On January 24, 1935, Sri Sri Sri Shivabalayogi Maharaj was born as Sathyaraju to a poor family of weavers in the village of Adivarapupeta. The almost exclusive occupation in this small village is weaving colorful cotton sarees and dhoties on hand looms. The village is set in the middle of extremely fertile rice paddies near the mouth of the Godavari River on the East coast of Southern India. The villagers are primarily devotees of Lord Shiva, perhaps because a little more than a kilometer away is Draksharam and its famous temple in which are located the sanctuary of the Bhimeshwara Lingam, a form of Lord Shiva, and one of the rare Shakti Pith manifestations of Devi, the Divine Mother.

How wonderfully did God prepare the soul of Satliyaraju for his mission of selfless service! Shivabalayogi often described how nine Gods and mahayogis contributed a portion (amsha) of their souls to create the soul of Sathyaraju: Brahma, God the Creator of the Universe; Vishnu, the Power which sustains all creation; Shiva or the God the Holy Spirit who brings comfort and enlightenment and burns away the delusions of creation; Ganesha, the Son of God and Lord of all Creation who is the vehicle through which everything is attained; Kali, the fierce Goddess who ruthlessly destroys all delusion; Nandi, the powerful vehicle and protector of God; Narada, the maharishi and sage to the Gods and mahayogis; Dhurvasa, the powerful and irascible maharishi; and Sage Vasishtha, one of the seven Rishis, whose teachings to Rama are preserved in the spiritual treatise, Yoga Vasishtha.

A great divine soul requires highly spiritual parents to descend and embody in this physical world. Sathyaraju was born in a remote village among poor and simple people who were great devotees of God. Many years later when Shivabalayogi was asked about this, he explained, “Many people desire good children. Very few look for unusual children. Even if they desire, it is not possible unless they can bear the power of such a birth. When Christ, Buddha and such people were born, it is said that a great light entered their mother’s womb. Mary [the mother of Jesus] and Maya Devi [the mother of Buddha] were great ladies who spent their lives in the purest way possible always thinking of God and living in prayer.”

Sathyaraju’s father, a great devotee of Lord Shiva, chanted the sacred five syllable mantra, “Namah Shivaya,” meaning worship Shiva. His soul contained a portion (amsha) of the soul of Lord Shiva. Sathyaraju’s mother’s soul similarly contained a portion of the soul of Shiva’s spouse, Goddess Parvati. In each birth for this auspicious soul who is Shivabalayogi in this life, the male and female aspects of God gave of Themselves to the souls of his father and mother. This began with the first birth in this cycle of creation, Ganesha, the elephant-headed son of Sati, the spouse of Lord Shiva.[26]

Lord Shiva who brings love and the incalculable wealth of Self realization typically lives in the world as a beggar. So it should not be surprising that in most lives, His son is born in humble poverty. Sathyaraju’s childhood was spent in extremely difficult poverty. His father died when Sathyaraju was barely two and a half years old. For many years, the boy was taken from his natural mother and raised by a step mother who cared little for him. But Sri Swamiji’s mother and grandfather took good care of him and the child grew up to be courageous and enterprising.

Sathyaraju was very strong minded and uncompromising by temperament. Throughout his childhood, poverty compelled him to work to support his family. Although Sathyaraju was not well treated by his stepmother, he was smart enough to learn good business practices from her and applied them to maximize the value of the sarees he and his family wove. He observed, learned and seized the opportunity to earn more than a mere subsistence income through starting his own business. He figured out how to purchase raw materials cheaply and with hard work successfully undersold his competition in the village. By the age of fourteen he had become a major source of income for his mother, grandfather, brother and two sisters.

Sathyaraju’s determination, uncompromising honesty, courage, leadership and success earned him admiration and dislike. Those who saw his fine qualities loved him. Those who were jealous harbored dislike. But almost all in the village found him challenging, which earned the boy the nickname “Against” for being so headstrong and contrary.

Tapas

The Balayogi in 1951 after two years of tapas.

The ordinary life of Sathyaraju the village boy ended in the early afternoon of August 7, 1949. He was fourteen and a half years old and up to this time he had demonstrated no inclination for spiritual attainment. This particular afternoon he was with several mates and had just finished bathing in an irrigation canal of the Godavari River just a few hundred meters outside his native village. Even today the village children can be seen playing in these cool canal waters. Palmyra trees, looking like a tall palm or coconut tree, abound in that part of India. The ripe palmyra fruit contains a pulp which when squeezed yields a sweet and refreshing juice. The group of boys found some recently fallen palmyra fruit which they divided among themselves.

Sathyaraju was sitting on the canal bank squeezing the juice from the palmyra when he heard the sacred sound of “Om” emanating from the fruit. Mesmerized by waves of bliss from the holy sound, he concentrated his attention on the fruit. A black Shivalingam appeared, about a foot and a half in height. This Lingam emitted a powerful light, then broke in half to reveal Shivabalayogi’s Guru. His beautiful body was over seven feet tall and He had the matted hair, loin cloth, and ash smeared over His body in the manner of the ancient rishis. The Divine Guru, no other than Lord Shiva Himself, made the boy sit in yogic posture and close his eyes. The Guru then touched the boy between the eyebrows and tapped him on the head. Sathyaraju immediately went into deep samadhi.

The boy began to meditate in samadhi for twenty-three hours every day. During the daytime, reverent villagers and visitors came for the darshan of the Balayogi (the “Boy Yogi”) and to pay homage, and his devoted mother would care for her son. But at night the boy was unprotected and there were those who disliked him. Some malicious individuals secretly came to beat or bum his body while his consciousness remained focused on Divine bliss. Some dribbled sugar cane juice on his body so the ants would torment him. The Balayogi would feel the excruciating pain only when he came out of samadhi. But this Balayogi had determination in unusual quantity. He ignored the tormentors and bodily pain and focused his mind until he again entered samadhi.

After some weeks, the Balayogi moved the site of his tapas to the village graveyard which even the trouble makers feared at night. There his body was tormented by the little creatures which bit or nibbled his flesh as if he were one of the cadavers. Worms, insects, snakes and rodents constantly pestered his body and evil spirits tried to disturb the equanimity of his mind. Scorpion and snake bites poisoned his system. At night when he washed himself in the nearby canal, the blood from his wounds attracted the nibbles of the fish. During these trials and owing to the continued, steady and fixed posture of his samadhi, the tiger skin on which the Balayogi sat glued itself to his skin. The wounds on his closely clasped fingers became engrafted into each other. When they were forcibly separated, blood flowed freely. The Balayogi’s body remained motionless for so long that his joints became stiff. Within a year he was virtually paralyzed so that dragging himself to and from his daily baths was an excruciatingly painful chore. Still the Balayogi relentlessly obeyed the instructions of his Guru to pursue his tapas.

The Balayogi after three years of tapas.

The villagers constructed a gunny-sack hut to afford some shelter from the intense heat of the day, then some local, deeply spiritual revenue officials planned the construction of a more permanent protection. They met with the owner of the land adjacent to the graveyard who agreed to donate it to the cause. A little over a year after the Balayogi began his tapas, his devotees completed a small twelve feet by twelve feet masonry Dhyana Mandir (meditation temple) where the Balayogi could be protected by lock and key.

The Balayogi remained in samadhi for at least twenty-three hours every day, returning to ordinary consciousness at midnight long enough to wash himself and, when he was taking food, eat a little fruit or drink a glass of milk. Sometimes serpents would cross his path when he want to bathe. As enjoined in the scriptures, the Shastras, he would not step over them or retrace his steps. When he tried to put them off gently with his foot, they would bite and inject poison into his system. But he put up with the pain in perfect calmness, never molesting the serpents in the least. He resigned himself solely to the protection of the Divinity which guided him.

The first four years he sat facing East until he mastered the tapas of that direction on October 28, 1953. The next day he began meditation facing the North, which tapas he mastered on August I, 1955. His Divine Guru had him wait a few days until August 7 when He instructed the Balayogi to face West, the most difficult direction for meditation.

The Balayogi suffered throughout the entire period of meditation to the West. He was afflicted with all sorts of illnesses and his skin cracked and bled. Sores and boils appeared in several parts of his body, giving him untold suffering. During one forty-eight hour period, blood flowed like perspiration through the pores of his skin. His body could no longer tolerate milk, and in any event, every cow which was milked for his benefit suddenly and mysteriously died. It was only after a devotee hit upon the idea of a commercial food supplement that the possibility of starvation was averted. Divine spirits were sent to tempt him and test his resolve. To add to his troubles, he would receive bad news about family or friends and these mental disturbances compelled him to instruct his mother and devotees not to disturb him in any way and not to enter the Dhyana Mandir except on one designated day a month. Only if they smelled the stench of death were they to unlock the doors. It was during this period that he was savagely bitten by a great cobra which left his body unconscious for several days until restored by the Divine touch of his Guru. Yet the Balayogi continued his tapas with perfect equanimity, declining all medicine and treatment, and asking for nothing from his Divine Guru.

Shivabalayogi after completing eight years of tapas and having mastered tapas in all four directions.

He mastered tapas to the West on the 25th of June, 1956, and on the next day he began meditation facing South, a comparatively easy direction with few obstacles. He completed this direction in May of 1957, having mastered tapas of all four directions in a little less that eight years. His Divine Guru now instructed him to complete a full twelve years of tapas. However, for these final four years the Balayogi was instructed to meditate only twelve hours every day. This allowed him to give darshan to devotees, and many people would gather to play bhajans in his presence for several hours each day. The Balayogi could take short rests of a few hours after midnight, and he began to eat more fruit and raw vegetables. On special occasions like Mahashivaratri, the Balayogi’s birthday, and the anniversary of his tapas, his devotees organized mass feedings when many thousands of people ate blessed food (prashad) in his presence.

The last year of his tapas proved to be another period of severe trials. By January of 1961 he lost his appetite for food and resumed his earlier meager daily diet of a glass of milk. Some days he drank only water. He began to spend more and more time in samadhi and in June he began a continuous samadhi broken only two months later when his Guru brought him back to ordinary consciousness and pronounced his tapas successfully completed. It was on this occasion, midnight of August 1, 1961, that the Divine Guru and the Divine Mother, Parvati, revealed Their glorious Selves to the great yogi. Lord Shiva was very pleased with His great disciple and asked the Balayogi whether he wanted anything. The Balayogi’s response is a highly revealing statement on the true greatness of Shivabalayogi. He simply replied that he had undertaken tapas at the instruction of his Guru, and therefore his Guru should instruct him on what he should want.

Lord Shiva gave the great yogi his name, Shiva-Bala-Yogishwara, meaning Lord or Master of Yogis devoted to Shiva and Parvati. The yogi shortened the name to Shiva-Bala-Yogi to avoid confusion with “lshwara” or “Lord,” a name used to describe God.

The completion of Shivabalayogi’s tapas was witnessed by a huge gathering which some estimated to be a hundred thousand or more. For some time before, devotees had been making announcements to the media and the public that the boy yogi was expected to complete tapas on August 7, 1961, and that he would have a message for the world. Shortly before that date, Shivabalayogi himself announced that his Guru had declared his tapas successfully completed. On Sunday, August 6, 1961, the day before the twelfth anniversary of Shivabalayogi beginning tapas, a press release was sent by telegram across India as follows:

Shiva Bala Yogi attains highest powers known to humanity. Challenges the entire universe that man can live for ever without food. Universal peace is in man’s own hands and how one can contribute for world peace will be known to whole universe when Shiva Bala Yogi will narrate his experiences in 12 years samadhi which he undertook for the world peace. Shiva Bala Yogi’s message is the message unknown to humanity because he is staying without food openly amongst people for the last three months.

Many devotees were anxiously gathered by the Dhyana Mandir on the night of August 6th. They knew that this was the eve of the twelfth anniversary when the Balayogi should complete his tapas. But there was uncertainty until he actually announced in public that his Guru had declared his tapas successfully completed. Most of the people tried to stay awake to see what might happen, but almost all fell asleep automatically. God had lulled almost everybody to sleep, but there were a few witnesses.

A Divine light came down from the sky and enveloped and entered the Dhyana Mandir where the Balayogi was finishing his twelve year tapas. Among the handful of witnesses were Shivabalayogi’s mother and a surveyor who happened to be working that night in the village. Those who saw the Divine light described it as a very great light, brilliant in intensity. Similarly, in Adivarapupeta on the morning of Sri Swamiji’s mahasamadhi ceremonies thirty-three years later, another occasion when many hundreds of devotees had gathered at the ashram, only a handful of people saw the Divine light which descended from a star in the sky to the ground before the Dhyana Mandir, then entered into its sanctuary.

The public reception took place at 3 p.m. on the 7th of August, 1961. A rostrum had been erected on the first floor level in front of the Dhyana Mandir so the huge crowd could see Shivabalayogi emerge from his tapas. The authorities had posted a hundred police constables and eighty volunteers for protective purposes, but they were outnumbered and virtually helpless to control the vast crowd.

Opposite and very near the Dhyana Mandir was a large and deep pond without any protective wall or fencing. The surging crowd pressed hard on those standing around the pond and a serious accident seemed likely at any moment. Just about the time when Shivabalayogi was to appear on the rostrum, those who were lining the pond were reeling under the strain of the pressure from behind. Then Shivabalayogi emerged. He looked around and gazed steadily at the mass of people in front and around the pond. The gathering became quiet and steady. Jostling and pushing and pressing suddenly stopped as if by a miracle. The mahayogi through his mere presence had calmed the minds of the crowd.

Sri Sri Sri Shivabalayogi Maharaj delivered his first message of peace to the world in his native language of Telugu. In it, he made reference to his own experience during tapas when his Divine Guru took him on a visit to the world of the Sun. He compared that visit with a contemporaneous news event unknown to people in that remote part of south India: The Russian manned space flight. To help explain his message, Sri Swamiji had given a vision to a devotee earlier that day. In his meditation, Kakarala Kameswara Rao saw the Russian cosmonaut Yuri Gugarian in a Sputink in space above the earth. The devotee told several people about his unusual vision, so there were many who had some idea of what the mahayogi was referring to. in his message that afternoon.

The following translation of His Holiness’ message is based upon the Telugu text printed and circulated the following day, and upon the vivid memory of an eyewitness to these events, Hindi Master.

For the peace of the world I did Tapas for Twelve years. Now I am going to tell you about that Tapas.

The question among the people is whether the astronomer who travels in the Sputnik can reach the world of the Sun, conquer it, and return. The scientists say it can be done, but ordinary people wonder whether conquering the Sun will have a bad effect on the world and bring darkness.

In samadhi you can go to the Sun and you can come back. I am telling you from my own experience.

I challenge everyone that the scientists cannot reach the Sun and return unless they do dhyana and travel in samadhi. Only the person who wants to bring peace to the world can visit the Sun.

This is possible only if you come to know who you really are and whether you really own your own body. You must do whatever is necessary to realize this. There lies the solution to world peace.

Many years later Sri Swamiji explained the simple significance of his statements. He wanted to make known to the people that the powers attained through tapas (tapas shakti) are great, that a person with tapas shakti could travel anywhere in creation, even to the Sun as Sri Swamiji himself did during tapas. He wanted to tell the people what could be accomplished through tapas shakti. Over the decades, Sri Swamiji often warned about the dangers of nuclear destruction, which adds additional significance to his first message to the public. Perhaps by using the Sun as his example, he was also referring to nuclear technology.

Many tens of thousands had the privilege of witnessing Shivabalayogi emerge from his twelve year tapas. We know that his body quite literally glowed with a divine radiance because color movie film taken of him a year and a half later shows this radiance and the powerful intensity of his presence. This vast crowd was greatly blessed by the very special and powerful darshan of His Holiness. They could not have looked on the mahayogi’s radiant body without awe, reverence and wonder. Throughout his life in the physical body, it was a spiritually transforming experience simply to gaze into his divine face.

Sri Swamiji’s Mission

From the beginning, Sri Swamiji’s ministry had four elements:

(1)  Giving darshan while in samadhi;

(2)  Dispensing blessed vibhuti to heal all forms of disease, whether physical, mental or spiritual, and also to be used for meditation;

(3)  Using spiritual songs (bhajans or kirtan) as a medium to induce bhava samadhi (spiritual rapture); and

(4)  Initiating people into dhyana (meditation).

These were the four basic methods with which Sri Shivabalayogi carried out the mission his Divine Guru gave him: to bring the people of the world into the line of meditation. Sri Swamiji was fond of reminding devotees that all the great yogis taught in the same manner, and he often used Jesus as a specific example.

Sri Swamiji never lectured, wrote books or gave any discourses. His only verbal instruction is that people should meditate at least an hour every day. His focus is to encourage the practice of meditation. Any instruction or teaching we may need he will give to us in the silence of meditation. We will discover ourselves, our purpose in life, our relationships with others, what we need to be doing, and everything else we need or want to know through meditation. Why should we believe what others say? We should experience and know for ourselves through meditation.

Through meditation our tensions reduce and we become more peaceful. Meditation improves our physical well being and allows us to be more effective in our worldly activities. The more we meditate, the more the blessings.

Most importantly, meditation is necessary to lose our false identification with the physical body. Sri Swamiji reminds us that the purpose of meditation is to develop spiritual consciousness. Other spiritual practices are important and usually necessary preparations for the spiritual life, but samadhi and Self realization require meditation. Sri Swamiji wants us to be aware of the Spirit and ultimately to become Self realized, so he teaches us meditation and guides us towards the indescribable bliss that is God and our true Self. Meditation is the light of the world.

Bhava Samadhi

Sri Swamiji in samadhi and Srimati Kailas Kumari Devi, the Maharani of Patna, (Mataji) in bhava samadhi. Sri Swamiji’s mother is on the left.

Of the four methods Sri Shivabalayogi uses to accomplish his mission, bhava samadhi probably is the most unusual. The word “bhava” or existence describes several variously deep spiritual experiences. Bhava samadhi (sometimes translated as spiritual trance) is the blissful experience which results from the soul presence of spiritually advanced beings such as yogis and gods. The person feels immense bliss. The depth of the experience may vary, and the person may dance ecstatically or move about in most unusual ways, depending upon the higher being in them. The person experiencing bhava samadhi no longer has any control over the body. It is the divine being within.

Since Sri Swamiji completed tapas, bhava samadhi has been a common phenomenon during his bhajan programs, lively songs praising the many names, incarnations and manifestations of God. The gods and great realized souls hover around the presence of a great yogi, and Swamiji uses their astral bodies and the bhajan music to enter the body of devotees so they can experience divine bliss. Those whom Swamiji blesses with bhava receive several invaluable benefits: diseases, including chronic diseases, are cured; God-consciousness is instilled; the ego sense is subdued and replaced by a spirit of self surrender to the will of God; an absolute and implicit faith in God is instilled; and pain and misery due to mental or physical causes are removed. Sri Swamiji gives bhava samadhi for the spiritual development of devotees and to bring them into the line of meditation.

Although bhava samadhi is part of all spiritual traditions throughout the ages, the widespread manner in which Swamiji employs it to bring people onto the spiritual path is unique. During bhajans in his honor, there may be ten or twenty people in bhava samadhi, many more during special functions. Sometimes people coming for his darshan the first time will receive the great spiritual blessing. Sri Swamiji’s divine blessings are always present when his devotees gather to sing bhajans.

Even more special is the actual presence of Sri Swamiji through bhava samadhi. Since he completed his twelve year tapas, Sri Swamiji has been coming in bhava samadhi upon many devotees to talk, give guidance, bless vibhuti and generally do whatever he would normally do in his own physical body. This presence through bhava samadhi continues to this day.

The following is a small sample of experiences with bhava samadhi over the last several decades. They suggest the powerful blessings attained through this very special spiritual experience.

—  —

I have commonly experienced trance over the last thirteen or so years. My entire consciousness is present during trance. My mind is very calm and I get bliss like anything. I get immeasurable bliss in trance. I am conscious of everything but I have no control over my body. The mind is quite peaceful. I can communicate with Swami. When I am in trance and I want to see Swami, I simply try to see him in my brow center and I always find Him immersed in meditation. I see a shadow of Swami, a light body of Swami, totally immersed in dhyana. Whenever I want to see Swami, I simply look between my eyebrows and I see Swami looking just like Lord Shiva, with his eyes closed in dhyana.

I get bliss in every trance, although it is different each time. If the bhajan is good, I get perfectly immeasurable bliss. The better the bhajan, the better the trance. The bliss I experience cannot be described. I have never seen any other pleasure which can be compared with this. This is why whenever people are in trance, they want that bliss continued, continued, and continued forever.

—  —

Before I had the darshan of His Holiness Swamiji, my life was full of troubles, sufferings, sorrow and misery. I grew pessimistic and lost all faith in the existence of God. I thought this world to be full of only sorrow and suffering and life was not worth living. I was ordered by the Maharaja of Bhadawar to have Swamiji’s darshan in Agra. Unwillingly I went inside the hall and saw people moving in trance. I thought they were all pretending. I got irritated and thought very badly about Swamiji.

When through the grace of Swamiji I came into trance, I came to know that Swamiji is really God who has come on earth as an incarnation. During trance I feel heavenly joy which is impossible to explain or describe. Long standing chronic diseases which could not be cured by all types of medical treatments began to disappear very rapidly. I totally surrendered myself to Swamiji, my worries began to vanish, and my faith in religion returned.

In trance I see figures of Swamiji moving and I can follow them dancing with joy automatically without any effort on my part. My body becomes like the string of a musical instrument vibrating with the bhajan sounds of the harmonium, drums and other instruments and voices. I see visions of Swamiji in the form of every God, including Bhagavan Rama and Bhagavan Sri Krishna.

My chest used to be bent towards the inside and despite my best efforts, I could not remain straight even for a short time. Once when the bhajans were over, I was leaving the hall and was standing outside. A woman who was in trance came out and made me straight with the strength of her hands. Since that time and with the grace of Swamiji, I was made to do exercises in trance and also automatically in my normal state every five to ten minutes. I was doing very difficult exercises which normally I could never do. My chest began to develop into a normal state and now it is almost straight. Even now when I sit for dhyana or attend kirtan, I have these exercises which from time to time are changed and regulated automatically.

—  —

The first time I saw people moving in trance, I thought they were pretending. I told my wife that if I do not wish to move my hands, how can it move? Perhaps because of my doubt, I was given prashad when I was before Swamiji. As soon as I tried to take the prashad, I found I could not take it because I could not control my hands. I used all the power within me to move my hands and take the prashad, but all in vain. Then Swamiji smiled and directed that some vibhuti be put on my forehead. My hands became normal and I took the prashad.

Generally when I am in trance, my fingers take the typical shape of Swamiji’s fingers and my eyes remain closed. Once I tried to force myself to keep my eyes open, but I saw the face of His Holiness shining like the sun and my eyes closed. I could not keep them open. I know that Swamiji has different forms for different people and Swamiji allows himself to be known by only that person who Swamiji wants to know him. When I saw his face shining like the sun, others at the same time and same place saw him in an ordinary form.

There was a gentleman from Kachaura who was suffering from many diseases and came to attend kirtan. I was in trance and went near him and began to cry. Tears fell from my eyes and touched the gentleman who also fell into trance. He told me afterwards that he felt very comfortable and he felt that the pain was being taken out of his body. The gentleman died peacefully after a few months.

There was a woman who suffered from paralysis and was unable to move one hand. She came to have darshan of His Holiness and she fell in trance and both of her hands started moving. Her sister had some skin disease on her head which caused her to lose her hair, leaving many bald spots on her head. She took vibhuti from His Holiness and used it, after which she grew very beautiful hair on her head.

I had a constant pain in my waist. A man was sitting behind me in trance. He touched that very painful part and I felt very comfortable and my pain disappeared. Another man from Agra also had pain in his back. He came to take vibhuti. My sister was in trance. She struck him with her fist on the back where he was sore and his pain disappeared.

—  —

My mind becomes controlled in Swamiji’s presence. I get involved deeper and deeper and then I forget myself. My mind is slowly transformed. He gives us the power, but He doesn’t force anything on anybody. The power He gives may be used for anything, for developing the personality or influence or worldly power or business or job. Some people with this power may go and shine in other fields, at the same time keeping it as a base for spiritual life.

Trance is an experience in which you feel the power flowing into you. When I am in trance, I feel that power working in me. I am aware of the power and my movements, but the physical movements are not mine.

Trance may be very peaceful and very powerful. It may be very ferocious, like in the trance of Narasimha Avatar or the Divine Mother Durga. But there is no fright in trance because bhava removes all fear. All these experiences with Swamiji prepare your mind to fearlessness. If a small mind were to get a high experience it would shudder and be afraid. But Swamiji doesn’t give experiences unless the person is prepared for it. Trance is not given to each individual.

Sometimes I am in trance and I feel like Swamiji is all around me and I am talking to Him, not physically but like an experience. So in addition to the god whose bhava I experience, I also feel and communicate with the presence of Swamiji. I feel as though my personality is so vast and I am no longer the little personality associated with my small, physical body. After the bhava experience I feel very clear and my mind is very alert.

Early Travels

Sri Swamiji remained in his native village of Adivarapupeta for about a year and a half after completing tapas. He used this time to regain his physical strength from the extreme tapas which he had just completed. It took his digestive system some time to get used to eating solid foods. During his tapas he had practiced silence (mowna, not speaking) for many years, and he continued to practice mowna at times after tapas. For many years afterwards he spoke very little, often communicating by scribbling notes. His silence reflected the spiritual intensity of his tapas and his preference for giving devotees practical experience rather than talk.

A number of devotees from Mysore State, now the State of Karnataka, went for Sri Swamiji’s darshan. They requested His Holiness to visit Mysore State and pay respects to the memory of Tapaswiji Maharaj[27] at Tapaswiji’s ashram in the Nandi Hills. They also wanted Sri Swamiji to bless the people of Mysore State and stay for sometime, of in Dodballapur, near Bangalore.

In response to these appeals, Sri Swamiji left the Dhyana Mandir in Adivarapupeta at 11:00 A.M. on the 21st of March, 1963, and proceeded to visit Tapaswiji’s ashrams, first at Kakinada and then the ashram at the foot of Nandi Hills near Bangalore. A press release was prepared which Sri Swamiji approved as follows:

Sri Shivbalyogiji coming out of his Dhyana Mandir on 26 March 1963. Visiting Dodballapur in Mysore State by the end of March, 1963.

Sri Sathyaraju, a boy of 14 years and 7 months (born at Adivarapupeta, Draksharam Town, East Godavari Dist., Andhra Pradesh) who had scant education and was not trained in spiritualism under any guru, did continuous tapasya for 13 years[28] and has attained spiritual power unknown to this world in recent years. Time has come, for the world will have the good fortune of witnessing the demonstration of this great power. Sri Sathyaraju after the attainment of spiritual siddhi has become Sri Shivbalyogi.

Today the most important thing for mankind is the practice of dhyana. Its preaching to others is of secondary importance. Sri Shivbalyogi will be in our midst to demonstrate how the human mind can be controlled to save mankind from disaster.

On 26 March, 1963, i.e. three days after Mahashivaratri, Sri Shivbalyogi will come out of his Dhyana Mandir into the outer world. All seekers of Truth will have the unique opportunity of witnessing Divine Power at work and satisfying their spiritual hunger.

Some of the devotees hailing from Dodballapur have succeeded recently in getting the gracious sanction of Sri Shivbalyogiji to their prayer to bless them with his darshan and sojourn at Dodballapur, and the people of the Mysore State will indeed be fortunate in getting his darshan and direct contact by about the end of March 1963.

The party that accompanied Sri Swamiji was small: two automobiles and a handful of young devotees chosen by Sri Swamiji to serve him during the difficult days ahead. Some of the companions set out with Sri Swamiji as if playmates setting out on an adventure. But they all began to appreciate Sri Swamiji’s spiritual greatness and the Divine protection guiding them after they began traveling and spending time with the great yogi. Hardly a day went by without some miraculous experience. In addition to the powerful presence of Sri Swamiji, they would feel an extraordinary Divine force protecting them, the great yogi, and their mission.

Some people gave them trouble, but Sri Swamiji always gave his companions peace. They had a sense of the need to protect Sri Swamiji and make sure his mission was successful. Sri Swamiji’s companions learned to protect him, make sure the food he ate was safe, provide him with minimal physical comforts, and keep away those who would have harmed or tried to use him for selfish aims. In this way, some five or six devotees served and protected Sri Swamiji during the first years of his travels throughout India. Some would return or be sent home and others would join, but the group always remained quite small.

The first leg of the initial tour took Sri Swamiji and his small group to Dodballapur, near Bangalore. There one of the people who helped organize the tour had built a very small ashram for Sri Swamiji. There are many mutts[29] in Dodballapur and some of the people who ran them came to feel extremely jealous of Sri Swamiji and the attention and crowds he was getting. They felt they were more important that this simple village boy and they ridiculed the bhava samadhi (spiritual rapture) which was common during Sri Swamiji’s public programs.

These mutt leaders sent messengers to Sri Swamiji and his devotees threatening harm unless they left Mysore State. They sent goondas (ruffians) to Sri Swamiji’s bhajans to create trouble. They openly threatened people and the thugs even used to beat-up Sri Swamiji’s close devotees. Sometimes many goondas sent by different mutts would converge on Sri Swamiji’s ashram at the same time, and the small group of devotees with Sri Swamiji often had to rely upon police protection.

One night, a large number of thugs converged on Sri Swamiji’s ashram to disrupt the bhajans and force Sri Swamiji and his devotees to run away. They were sent by various different mutts and it was shaping up to be a very ugly situation. There was a police constable at the ashram who had become Sri Swamiji’s devotee and who used to get bhava samadhi. That constable was asked to run to the police station and return as soon as he could with a large force. Within a half an hour, a large group of policemen arrived who proceeded to thrash the thugs and chase them away. This police response was a great miracle because it was extremely improbable that a lowly constable would have any influence, and it was unheard of that so many policeman could gather so quickly.

A yogi is undeterred by any obstacle or opposition. Sri Swamiji, who demonstrated unusual determination as a child and throughout his tapas, traveled throughout India without regard to any physical danger, whether posed by jealous religious leaders, thugs, selfish politicians, ignorant skeptics, or even bandits. Sometimes he traveled by car through countryside known to be infested with criminal bands known as dacoits. Sri Swamiji often tells stories about encounters with dacoits who intended to rob his group but instead became awed by his divine presence. Some of those automobile drives were very long and tiresome and Indian roads take a severe toll on both car and occupants. Twice he was involved in serious automobile accidents, but each time and miraculously no one was seriously hurt.

Swamiji related the story about this accident on the road between Dehradun and Delhi. Four people were in the van, Swamiji in the back, when a front tire blew out and the vehicle ran off the mad and overturned. The two in front thought the two in back were dead, and the two in back thought the same about those in front. Swamiji had to break a window with his hand to get out, and he showed us the scar on his forearm. No one was seriously injured.

In the Ashram at Bannerghatta Road, Bangalore

Sri Swamiji established his first ashram in Bangalore on Bannerghatta Road in what was then open countryside. Devotees remember the power of his presence there to be so strong that it was impossible not to be affected. When the bhajans were going on at the ashram, devotees would go into bhava by the time they reached Bannerghatta Circle about a kilometer away. The bhava samadhi was so deep that sometimes only Sri Swamiji could bring them out of their rapture to ordinary consciousness. We have a devotee’s contemporaneous description of the early days at the Bannerghatta Road ashram which was found among Sri Swamiji’s personal papers.

The life at the ashram in Bangalore is almost the same as at Adivarapupeta. Sri Shiva Bala Yogiji spends the whole of his time in dhyana except during fixed hours when he gives darshan to the devotees, initiates them into dhyana, and participates in the bhajans in his unique way.

Young or old, men or women of any caste or religion can have darshan of Sri Shiva Bala Yogiji. They will find him seated in padmasana[30] on a tiger skin with the eyes closed. He blesses them silently. He gives them sacred ashes (vibhuti), flowers and fruits. He opens his eyes and looks at the devotees keenly.

To those who go for relief from physical or mental ailment he gives suitable advice and prashad. To those who want spiritual advancement, they are initiated into dhyana or concentration of mind. They are asked to practice dhyana in their homes regularly every day for about an hour and he asks them to record their experiences in dhyana and to narrate them to him and seek further guidance. He says that once a devotee is initiated, his physical presence will not be necessary and the devotee will get his guidance wherever the devotee may be.

Devotees are initiated into dhyana directly by Sri Shiva Bala Yogiji or by one of his devotees in his immediate presence. The devotee is given the necessary instructions and guidance. …

Sometimes in dhyana, the devotee realizes his Ishtadeva according to his samskara.[31] He voluntarily assumes and naturally takes on the face and expressions of his Ishtadeva. They are said to enter the devotees’ bodies. This is called poonaka[32] (bhava samadhi). Particularly during the time of bhajans, bhava samadhi can easily be seen. At the bhajans, the expressions of Nara-Narayana, Shankara, Parvati, Rama and Hanuman can be witnessed often. The facial expression of Sri Shiva Bala Yogiji himself can be seen. Surely, this phenomenon is a unique sight baffling to the ordinary human mind. One may suddenly begin to hear some message suitable to the occasion or the seeker, or hear the sacred rhythmic sound of Omkar, or witness those in bhava samadhi successfully initiate other devotees into dhyana, some of whom go into trance quickly.

Also these bhajans are conducted by the devotees in their own homes or in different parts of the country. In all these places, these wonderful sights are common. They are all inspired, controlled and guided by the power of Sri Shiva Bala Yogi independently of where his physical presence may be.[33]

Sri Shiva Bala Yogi says that the transformation of devotees through bhava samadhi is beneficial to the devotees, helps them in their concentration, and will not harm the devotees in any way.

Sri Shiva Bala Yogiji’s mission is the reclamation of humanity to spiritual life. To this end he wants individuals to develop the power of mind, know its nature, and go beyond it to the spirit.

Almost thirty years later, eyewitnesses and devotees whose parents were eyewitnesses confirm these descriptions of Sri Swamiji in the first public years after tapas. He talked little and generally did not engage in question and answer conversations with devotees. He often would not answer questions at all except in meditation. Only rarely would he look at a person, and even more rarely smile. But people had wonderful experiences in meditation, and it was easy to experience the effect of his loving power moving across the room during the mass meditations.

In the late 1970’s Sri Swamiji talked more freely and became more accessible conversationally. Sri Swamiji described how devotees would come to the Bannerghatta Road ashram early in the morning to converse with him. They would talk for hours and ask the great yogi questions about all sorts of subjects.

Sri Swamiji’s Two Mothers

One cannot describe Sri Swamiji’s early years of public ministry, even in passing, without mentioning the two great souls who protected him so lovingly and whom Sri Swamiji dearly loved. They are his “two” mothers, his birth mother and the royal queen who cared for him as if he were her son.

Sri Swamiji’s birth mother, Smt. Parvatamma Allaka, is first and foremost among his devotees. It was his mother who cared for and protected the Balayogi while he underwent the rigors of intense tapas. After tapas, it was his mother who continued to selflessly serve her divine son by making sure that every visitor to the ashram, great or humble, received food, drink, comfort and human kindness. During the years Parvatamma Garu lived and worked at the old Bangalore ashram on Bannerghatta Road, she was the most publicly accessible person, the instrument through whom Sri Swamiji showered his own motherly love. Sri Swamiji described her mother as an incarnation of Goddess Parvati and she is regarded as a great saint in her own right with many miracles attributed to her.

The mahasamadhi where Sri Swamiji’s mother’s body is buried is located at the old ashram on Bannerghatta Road. Whenever Sri Swamiji would begin or return from a journey away from Bangalore, or on any other festive or auspicious occasion, he would visit and pray at his mother’s mahasamadhi. For example, when devotees from Delhi presented Sri Swamiji with a new automobile on August 7, 1993, that same night Sri Swamiji drove it to the old ashram and paid his respects to his mother. It was as if he was proudly showing his beloved mother the wonderful present he had received. To this day, many devotees pray to Sri Swamiji’s holy mother for help and love and Sri Swamiji continues to ask his devotees to visit and pray at his mother’s mahasamadhi. The care with which Parvatamma served her son, and the reverence with which Sri Swamiji regards his mother are divine examples of the loving relationship which should bind every parent and child.

In June of 1966, Sri Swamiji’s other mother came for her first darshan of Sri Swamiji. Sri Swamiji called Smt. Kailas Kumari Devi, the Maharini of Patna, simply “Mataji,” meaning honored mother, and so she is remembered by Sri Swamiji’s close devotees. Mataji was Sri Swamiji’s birth mother in previous lives and Sri Swamiji explains that she is with him in every one of his births. He often would tell people about how she cared for and protected him as lovingly as she did her own sons. She and her husband, R. N. Singh Deo, the Maharaj of Patna and Chief Minister of Orissa, performed invaluable tangible service for Sri Swamiji’s mission.

When Sri Swamiji completed tapas, he had missed the practical, worldly education which a young person normally would learn between the ages of fourteen and twenty-six. Sri Swamiji devoted those years exclusively to meditation, and it was Mataji who took him under her motherly wing and completed his education by teaching him about every day matters. She also made sure that Sri Swamiji never wanted for money so that finances would never be a limitation for anything he wanted to accomplish. Sri Swamiji acknowledged that she and her husband paid for the expenses when he was touring India. If it were not for them, Sri Swamiji said, he would have been stuck in Bangalore. It was they who donated and improved the Dehradun ashram for Sri Swamiji’s service, the ashram where Sri Swamiji spent several months each summer conducting public programs and enjoying its beauty. It was their generous personal contribution which paid for the construction of the meditation hall at the new Bangalore ashram.

Mataji passed away in 1988 while Sri Swamiji was in the United States. Actually, relates Sri Swamiji, Mataji did not want him to travel overseas. In her motherly care, she knew that the tours would be arduous and difficult on Sri Swamiji’s body, as they proved to be. At the time of Mataji’s death, Sri Swamiji was staying in the house of one of his American hosts. An unusual looking bird came to Sri Swamiji’s window and would not leave that entire day. When the news arrived of her death, the bird died before Sri Swamiji. He explained that Mataji came in the form of that bird to die in Sri Swamiji’s presence, and he performed the rites for the bird.

Sri Swamiji told devotees as late as February of 1994 that neither his mother nor Mataji had taken new births. They were always with him, giving advice and warnings. They came in his dreams and he said it was as if they had never left.

Sri Swamiji once explained that a little kindness means a lot to a yogi. Spiritual leaders enjoy all the luxuries given by their followers. A yogi needs only a little. An example he gave more than once was the kind service Mary Magdalene gave Jesus. In the town where she lived, Sri Swamiji explained, no one received Jesus with even the smallest act of hospitality or kindness. Only she came to him and washed his feet with her tears and wiped them dry with her long hair. Because of that kind service, her memory is revered throughout the centuries. All the others in that town have long since been forgotten.

Sri Swamiji’s two mothers took loving care of the great yogi’s simple worldly needs. They are an example for us to take the same care of the beloved yogi as we would for our most revered parent or treasured child.

Serve the People

In September of 1965, Sri Swamiji underwent a forty day tapas during the Indo-Pakistan War of that year, and then from August 7 of 1968 to August 7 of 1969, Sri Swamiji underwent another full year of tapas at the old Bangalore ashram. In each case, Sri Swamiji explained that his Divine Guru asked him to undergo tapas for peace in the world.

Sri Swamiji often tells people that India has managed to preserve the ancient culture which once was common throughout the world. India has been blessed with many great souls over the centuries — avatars, saints, yogis and mahayogis, rishis and maharishis — who have worked hard to protect the ancient traditions. These great souls taught the people how to know God and when political hostility made it necessary, the sages retreated to the seclusion of the forests and mountains to await the proper time to return. Elsewhere, explains Sri Swamiji, this ancient culture of the rishis has been almost completely lost or destroyed. One example he often gave in the United States is the Native American culture which in many ways preserves the ancient ways. But the Europeans destroyed this society, although Sri Swamiji says there are still yogis among the Native Americans to this day. The need to protect the ancient spiritually based culture suggests the significance of the tapas which Sri Shivabalayogi performed to ensure peace between India and Pakistan.

Sri Swamiji paid very close attention to the political tensions and violence in the Punjab region of North India which culminated in the Indian government’s assault on the Sikh Golden temple in Srinagar. He had news reports read to him every day and he watched the news on television. He would complain that the government was inactive while people were suffering. The Indo-Chinese war in 1962 affected him so much that his skin would crack and bleed. His body would shake from concern. He often told devotees that people should be free from trouble and those who would harm society and country should not be tolerated.

Sri Swamiji’s concern for nations is not limited to India. While traveling in England he complained about that government’s failure to provide the elderly with adequate financial support. In the United States, he complained about its government meddling in others’ affairs, and he was extremely critical of the mishandling of the very dangerous situation with Sadaam Hussein in Iraq.

Tapas on the one hand and keenly following and criticizing political misconduct on the other, Sri Swamiji’s mission ranges from the sublimely subtle and spiritual to the very outward and physical. Shivabalayogi is an inexhaustible ocean of love and blessings. His desire for each person’s happiness extends to the smallest details of every day life.

The Mission Continues in India and Sri Lanka

Function at the new Bangalore ashram in J.P. Nagar.

One measure of Shivabalayogi’s greatness and the importance of his mission is the extent of his travels throughout India and Sri Lanka, then later to England, the United States, and Venice in Italy. Although it appeared that he was responding to invitations, he explains that everything he does, wherever he goes, and the people he chooses are all through the specific directions of his Divine Guru.

Newspaper clippings preserved from the early 1970’s suggest the almost furious pace with which Sri Shivabalayogi executed the instructions of his Divine Guru. For the year 1971 alone, the clippings describe the following travels:

A January 24, 1971, newspaper article reported that Sri Swamiji will undertake another all-India tour during the third week of February, his first trip since his one year tapas. The article also stated that two hundred and fifty thousand people had been initiated into meditation. From March 19 to April 8 of 1971, Sri Swamiji toured several cities in Sri Lanka.

On April 14, 1971, The Deccan Herald quoted a statement in an April 11 Colombo news conference that Sri Swamiji is considering invitations to visit England, Singapore and the U.S.A., and he has plans for an ashram in Colombo.

Sometime in the spring of 1971 he spent a month in his native village of Adivarapupeta for Mahashivaratri.

On April 24 of 1971, The India Express reported that Sri Swamiji will leave Bangalore for Agra on May 1 by road via Hyderabad, arriving at Agra on May 3. He was to stay there until May 15, then to Sambhar Lake in Rajasthan from May 16-20, and then to Dehradun from May 21.

On October 1 of 1971, a Bangalore newspaper reported Sri Swamiji’s return from a trip to New Delhi, Hyderabad, Secunderabad, Warangal, Nagarjunasagar, Cuddapah, Ananthapur and Hindupur.

In December of 1971, Sri Swamiji began a forty day tapas because of the war which again broke out between India and Pakistan.

These news clippings give us an idea of Sri Swamiji’s intensive mission to share God’s blessings with all people. Although he established Bangalore as the international center for his mission, he spent most of his time traveling to ashrams and devotees throughout India, including Adivarapupeta, Agra, Dehradun, Anantapur, Hyderabad, Jhansi, Delhi Guntur and Sambhar Lake. He visited Sri Lanka on several occasions and consecrated a Shivalingam in Nuwar Elya which he named Sri Lankadishwara.

Countless numbers of people were blessed with miracles and were healed of their sufferings. The crowds became so vast that the police were unable to ensure proper control, and there came a time when the hosts in India did little publicity rather than risk unmanageable throngs of people. Everywhere he went, multitudes experienced his divine love.

At the Dehradun ashram.

International Tours

On August 7, 1987, Sri Swamiji consecrated and gave life to the deities in the Brahma-Vishnu- Maheshwara Temple at the Bangalore ashram.[34] When the temple was inaugurated, he made the statement, “Now my work in India is done. From now on I’ll be working only in the rest of the world.” Almost immediately afterwards, in September of 1987, he left for England, his first visit to the West. He remained there through December, visiting several cities and towns and conducting evening meditation and bhajan programs. He returned to England the following year and arrived in the United States in the last week of September, 1988. Sri Swamiji told devotees that he is the first true yogi, one who has attained Self realization through tapas, to visit the West.

Five tours in the United States during 1988 to 1991 reflect the same tireless commitment to service which Sri Swamiji demonstrated in India and Sri Lanka over the previous twenty-five years. During a three-month period, Sri Swamiji conducted mass meditation and bhajan programs in Seattle and Portland in the Pacific Northwest; Los Angeles, Santa Barbara and Laguna Beach in California; Reno, Las Vegas and Santa Fe elsewhere in the West and Southwest; Columbus in Ohio; New York, Boston and Washington D.C. area in the East; and North Carolina in the South. Often he would stay only three or four nights in one city before flying to his next destination. These were schedules which would have worn out the strongest of men, but nothing deters Shivabalayogi from successfully carrying out the instructions of his Divine Guru.

His travels in the West were not Sri Swamiji’s only contacts outside of India. Over the years, many foreigners came for his darshan in India and received initiation into meditation. He received many invitations to visit such countries as Russia, Germany, Czechoslovakia, France, China, Australia and Israel, to name only a few. On his return to India after American and English tours in 1989, he visited Venice, Italy, where he consecrated and installed a Shivalingam at the request of Italian devotees who first met Sri Swamiji in India. By that time, Sri Swamiji had established three trusts in addition to the one in India. One is in England and two are in the United States.

In the early 1970’s, Sri Swamiji used to tell his Indian devotees that he would go to the West and that when he did, he will unify all religions. In the beginning of the 1990’s, communism still controlled the countries behind the Iron Curtain. Sri Swamiji told devotees that he wanted to travel to those countries because there was such a desire and need for their people to know God. Sri Swamiji talked about the revival of Buddhist practice in China and how he wanted to travel to that country also. A month before Sri Swamiji left his physical body, he was telling devotees that over the next forty years, he will bring about a common spiritual tradition among India, the Near East, Europe and America.

All this additional travel and work remains to be done, and Sri Swamiji shall accomplish it through his astral or subtle body presence and the work of his disciples and devotees. Once a devotee remarked that in the history of Sri Swamiji’s past lives, there seemed to be a pattern in which he sows a seed and leaves the work of nurturing its growth to disciples. Sri Swamiji responded, “You have said it. Even in this birth it is the same.”

Rishikesh.

MAHASAMADHI

His Holiness, Sri Sri Sri Shivabalayogi Maharaj, left his body on Monday the 28th of March, 1994, at a private hospital in Kakinada, East Godavari District of Andhra Pradesh. Kakinada is a town about an hour’s drive from Sri Swamiji’s native village of Adivarapupeta. His devotees were surprised and stunned when they learned the news. There seemed to be no warning and Sri Swamiji had continually assured his devotees that he would remain with them for many more decades.

Since his mahasamadhi[35], Sri Swamiji continues to miraculously appear to numerous devotees in various ways, including in meditation, dreams, bhava samadhi, and ordinary consciousness, and in various astral forms, including his light body and his physical form. Beginning a little over a year before his mahasamadhi, the full presence of Sri Swamiji has been coming through a very powerful bhava samadhi upon certain devotees to attend meditation and bhajan programs in exactly the same way as Sri Swamiji used to in his own physical body. During these various manifestations, Sri Swamiji explains that he did not want to leave his body but he knew that its poor physical condition was an obstruction to his spiritual mission in this world. He tells us that he is far from being dead and he assures us that he will be with us always.

Sri Swamiji asked for this book to be written about his mahasamadhi to help people understand why and how he left his increasingly disabled physical body. Since his mahasamadhi, devotees throughout the world have experienced a heightened sense of his presence and blessings, and Sri Swamiji is telling us that now that he has dropped the physical form, his spiritual mission will expand far beyond what it has been. Sri Swamiji will work through many devotees and disciples to complete his mission in the world, and he wants to assure all people that he remains very much alive and he is The Living Yogi.

The Yogi’s Body and Mission

His Holiness with the idol of Goddess Parvati and the lingam Ardhanareeshwara which he consecrated inside the Dhyana Mandir, the small room in which he sat for almost ten of his twelve-year tapas. This photo was probably takes shortly after he consecrated them.

In a very real sense, Sri Swamiji leaving his physical body is of absolutely no interest. The physical body and its attributes mean very little to one who is God realized. By comparison, we ordinary people live with the mistake of associating ourselves with our bodies: the physical body, the mind, and the emotions we feel. To be a yogi means to be free from such delusions. The yogi is constantly reminding people that the source of their unhappiness and confusion is their ignorance of who they really are. To a great yogi like Shivabalayogi, mahasamadhi means nothing but that he dropped the impermanent and unreal physical form.

Sri Swamiji was supremely indifferent to his body, judging not only by the physical difficulties he endured during tapas, but also by the endurance and indifference to extreme pain which he demonstrated repeatedly over the next thirty-three years. Sri Swamiji is fond of telling devotees that the body is of no importance to a yogi who can accomplish the Divine mission with or without it. Sri Swamiji often gave Jesus as an example. Although his body was killed just as he was beginning his mission, Jesus continued and successfully completed his work. If Jesus really had been killed, Sri Swamiji would point out, how is it that Jesus has so many millions of devotees in the world today?

There are some misunderstandings about what a God realized being is supposed to be. One of them is that the troubles of this world have no effect on them. Although this is true of the yogi’s consciousness, it is not true of the yogi’s body. The yogi is fully God realized and never forgets his or her essential nature is as spirit, the essential love-bliss-consciousness of existence. However, the yogi’s body (which includes the physical, mental and emotional bodies) is subject to the external environment just like those of any incarnated person. A yogi’s physical body will bleed if cut, get sick if infected, and be affected by sadness (although in passing) no less than that of the ordinary person. Jesus wept and suffered, much to the confusion of the early Christian theologians trying to establish a doctrine to explain how God the Son could have very human qualities. The yogi’s body is different only in its extreme refinement and sensitivity. This is one reason why yogis traditionally remain in quiet seclusion, often chasing away those who are spiritually unfit to be near.

Food could adversely affect Sri Swamiji’s divinely sensitive body. Although he never advocated any dietary restrictions such as vegetarianism for others, he himself was extremely careful with what he ate and any carelessly prepared food would upset his stomach. He often had to refuse food cooked by people with agitated minds. The smell of meat or fish would make him sick and eating such foods would have been poisonous. Yet Sri Swamiji subjected his holy body to the smells of meat and fish being served on commercial airplane flights. In all these travels Sri Swamiji willingly exposed his body to the suffering, selfishness and anguish which can make this world so painful for those who live in it.

No Self realized being wants to take a body and suffer. So much love does Sri Swamiji have for all people that he willingly descended from his heavenly abode of bliss to serve humanity by assuming its suffering. No physical discomfort would dissuade him from his Divine mission. Sri Swamiji thrust himself into the midst of sinners and the devout alike.

The truly enlightened do not use spiritual powers for their own benefit, so they will not heal their own physical afflictions. Especially in the last few years of his physical life when Sri Swamiji’s body suffered so very greatly, people would ask why he did not use his powers to heal himself. After all, they would point out, his physical ailments were causing sorrow to the devotees and they were also interfering with Sri Swamiji’s ability to travel and give darshan. Sri Swamiji would respond very firmly that it would be a misuse of his powers to use them for himself. He has come to this earth and completed tapas not for his own sake but to serve all people at the instructions of his Guru. Sri Swamiji would never use his powers for himself. He cared nothing for his body and he repeatedly said it made no difference to him whether he completed his mission with or without his body.

The yogi’s physical body plays an important role in the Divine mission in that it takes on the suffering of other’s sins or karma. This is a subject which Sri Swamiji talked about very little. Typically he would discourage discussion about past lives and karma. They do not exist, he would say, or he would challenge people to meditate and find out for themselves whether there was such a thing as karma or rebirth. He himself would never directly admit to taking on karma, but the Indian tradition is overwhelming that this is something which the guru does for the devotees, and we have the record of some great yogis of recent history who unequivocally stated that their physical maladies had to do with absorbing karma.

The ancient prophesies in the Kumar Nadi state that out of every hundred sins in the world, Shivabalayogi will take ten upon himself. His physical sacrifice included the twelve years of his intense tapas, and they continued throughout the next thirty-three years. There is much to ponder about this subject when we consider the significance of Sri Swamiji’s presence in Kuwait when the Iraqi forces of Sadaam Hussein invaded in 1990 and the subsequent ill effect on Sri Swamiji’s health. There is considerable evidence to confirm that he healed people of their physical and mental disturbances by taking them on himself. So much love he has for us and so much determination to complete the mission he accepted from God that the suffering of his physical body meant nothing to him.

Over the years, Sri Swamiji kept his physical ailments a secret from devotees because he did not want them to worry. Consequently, many people were surprised and disappointed when he dropped his body, seemingly so suddenly. So in one sense, this account of Sri Swamiji’s mahasamadhi is the explanation of the increasingly severe health problems he suffered which finally rendered his body unfit for further use, and the utterly selfless love with which he gave of himself for the sake of the devotees. The story of Sri Swamiji’s body is worth preserving because the extreme pain it suffered in its last three years is powerful evidence of the master’s great love for his devotees. He pushed his body long beyond its usefulness because he knew the devotees loved his physical presence. But there are many perspectives to the story of his mahasamadhi.

Jesus’ mission really began to spread widely among the people only after he left his body, and the same can be said of many great yogis who became well known only after they left their bodies. It is as if God protects the world teachers from the insincere through relative anonymity, allowing a more broad impact of their great spiritual blessings through devotees and disciples only after the master drops the body. Perhaps the devotees’ anguish over the loss of their guru’s body compels them to participate more fully in the Divine work.

In this sense, Sri Swamiji’s mahasamadhi is not a loss but a great, auspicious and cosmic event. Before his mahasamadhi, Sri Swamiji used to say that his mission would only really grow after he left his body. On one occasion at Dehradun in 1984, Sri Swamiji made rather pointed comments about the time for his devotees to start working: “I have been doing service to the world in some fashion or another since the age of ten. I have initiated hundreds of thousands of people into dhyana. There is no one until now in human history who has initiated so many people. I think my job is over. My mission is finished. Why should I not retire at age 55 or 58 like all the government servants? When I leave I shall initiate twelve, twenty-one, fifty-one or a hundred and one people into tapas and bless them to carry on my mission.”

The Story of Sri Swamiji’s Holy Body

The Shivalingam which Sri Swamiji consecrated in Adivarapupeta early in 1962, and which he named Ardhanareeshwara. The concave feature on the left represents Devi, the Goddess, and the convex shape of the right is Shiva. In the middle, facing the front, is the face of Ganesha. The features of Subramanyan are on the back. This is a naturally formed Shivalingam which has been permanently set into its pannevattam, the base.

Those devotees who came to know Sri Swamiji during the last few years of his physical life may have assumed that his body was weak from the severe tapas he completed in 1961. His body certainly bore the marks of his spiritual austerity, as if to demonstrate to a skeptical world that he had, in fact, completed twelve years of intense tapas. Sri Swamiji’s fingers always remained bent from twelve years of clasping his hands together.[36] On his body were many scars, including where the great cobra that adorns the neck of Lord Shiva savagely bit him on the heel of his right foot, and the scars from when a particularly vicious individual threw a burning, gasoline soaked rag on his body while the Balayogi was immersed in divine consciousness. However, the truth is that Sri Swamiji’s health used to be very robust.

Sri Swamiji’s body was understandably very weak immediately after tapas. Among Sri Swamiji’s personal papers are these physician’s notes dated Sunday, May 6, 1962.

Pulse rate is increasing slowly week by week, starting from about 68-80 at present. Tension & blood pressure are maintained well. Sri Swamiji is keeping up good circulation. Weight is increased by 5 lbs. Nerve toning is taking place as evidenced by sensations of pricking at the feet, etc. Improvement in the muscular tone. 1st fortnight. Peculiarities. Left half of the body shows one less pulse rate than the right. Improvement started in left half of the body. Now he is able to use left leg and left hand without feeling any strain. Right side of body, pulse rate less than the left. Increase in pulse rate and not equal shows that physical body function is being taken up. All the muscle tone of the body presented by soft flabby, relaxed muscles all over the body.

It is interesting to read the doctor’s note that the pulse differed depending on which side he measured. There are many stories from shortly after tapas about Sri Swamiji playing miraculous games with his body. Once when a married couple, both of whom were physicians, came for his darshan, Sri Swamiji had each hold one of his hands and measure the pulse. To their shock, one felt a normal pulse while the other felt no pulse at all.

During his tapas, Sri Swamiji had learned about the ancient Ayurvedic science of kaya kalpa which restores the body and its vitality. His teacher was Tapaswiji Maharaj, a great hatha yogi who had undergone the radical treatment three times to completely rejuvenate his aged body and attain the age of 185 years. Tapaswiji left his body through mahasamadhi on October 12, 1955, while Shivabalayogi was still in tapas. However, Tapaswiji’s disciples were familiar with the gathering, preparation and administration of the necessary herbal medicines. After great pressure, they persuaded Sri Swamiji to undergo a forty-five day kaya kalpa treatment. Sri Sachindanandji and Sri Narayan Dasji, close disciples of Tapaswiji Maharaj, collected the herbs for the medicine, kalpa rasayana, and in April of 1962 prepared the amla palah samyog.

Sri Swamiji underwent kaya kalpa in Adivarapupeta some time in 1962. The treatment was less than ideal because it requires a cool environment, which Sri Swamiji’s native village is not. Even so, the kaya kalpa helped rejuvenate Sri Swamiji’s entire physical body. By the time Sri Swamiji first left Adivarapupeta at the end of March in 1963 to begin a lifetime of traveling, the devotees who traveled with him reported no health problems.

Sri Swamiji quickly began to put on weight and by the early 1970’s he had acquired the great stomach which became so familiar to his devotees and the public. But Sri Swamiji’s body was anything but flabby. He exercised regularly and took good athletic care of his body. He used an isometric exercise bar for a half an hour each day to build massive muscle strength. He used to go for long and brisk daily walks. In Bangalore, he could walk privately for several kilometers along the rural roads next to the ashram until the city’s congestion spread past that area. In Dehradun there was always an opportunity to climb down to the dry river bed below the ashram or walk along some other, private route. His muscles were so powerful that four strong men massaged him deeply for several hours each day and he still complained it was not enough.

Sri Swamiji had no physical complaints until 1974 when he accidentally burned his right foot while travelling in a car. As it turned out, the injury was badly handled and the foot was infected by a fungus that went deep in the bone and became incurable. Mataji, Sri Swamiji’s beloved second mother, immediately got involved and arranged for expert medical care. However, the damage done was severe and it took until 1978 before the burn was healed. During this slow recovery, the doctors discovered that Sri Swamiji was diabetic, which helped explain why his recovery was so slow. From then on, Sri Swamiji regularly received insulin injections, something which he insisted was to be kept secret from all the devotees. The complications from this burn caused Sri Swamiji’s right foot to remain permanently larger than the left. Despite the incurable condition, the infection was mostly dormant until Kuwait in August and September of 1990.

Sri Swamiji underwent kaya kalpa a second time in September and October of 1982, again in Adivarapupeta. Apparently he did it just to generally tone up his body. A disciple of Tapaswiji prepared the necessary herbal medicines. However, this treatment appears to have had some bad effect because the very strict rules for its administration were not followed. Sri Swamiji later explained that he was given water to drink instead of milk, which caused a bad reaction of diarrhea. His hair, the long matted locks or jata which had grown past his waist over the thirty-three years since he started tapas, had torn loose and was finally cut off. We know that instead of taking the mandatory rest of several months after the intense portion of the treatment, Sri Swamiji immediately left Adivarapupeta for programs in Anantapur. Some devotees noted that instead of coming out of the treatment revived, he was less than healthy and from this time on he had a history of internal problems. Previously his diet included a lot of raw fruits and vegetables. After he began to eat more cooked foods which were easier to digest.

Kuwait, 1990

In spring of 1990, some of us devotees in the United States had made arrangements for Sri Swamiji to visit the United States and England by flying with an Asian airline over the Pacific. Sri Swamiji made us completely change his travel arrangements because he insisted upon traveling via British Airways over the Near East. At the time, those of us in America responsible for the tour were perplexed and others upset by Sri Swamiji’s seemingly unreasonable intransigence, the consequent inconvenience, and the substantial additional expense we had to incur. Sri Swamiji was so adamant that he borrowed money from the Bangalore Trust to buy the new airline tickets. We complied with Sri Swamiji’s wishes and paid off the Indian loan.

Before Sri Swamiji left the United States after that 1990 tour, he called one of us to leave a message: Swamiji would telephone when he returned to India. This was unusual because Swamiji never used to leave such messages. Typically, he would send the various hosts a short letter of thanks after returning to India. When we learned what had happened in Kuwait, the meaning of the message became clear. Swamiji had planned to be in Kuwait regardless of the danger and he left a message to assure us that he would be all right.

The British Airways flight taking Sri Swamiji back to India landed in Kuwait City for routine refueling as Iraqi soldiers were capturing the airport. It was August of 1990 and Sadaam Hussein had invaded Kuwait. The Iraqis detained the Boeing 747 and all its passengers, and Sri Swamiji was a virtual prisoner in a Kuwait City hotel room for almost two months under deplorable conditions. There was little food he could eat and the heat was so unbearable that the chronic bone infection in his right foot flared up painfully and remained a serious health problem. He had been secretly receiving regular insulin shots for years and now the supply was quickly exhausted.

Afterwards, Sri Swamiji talked about Kuwait often. The next year when he was in the United States again, he would describe to us how he spent his time studying the Iraqi soldiers, their toughness and their battle tactics. He complained that his Iraqi “hosts” failed to offer him even a glass of water, and he praised the courage of the flight captain who worked hard to protect and care for Sri Swamiji and the other passengers. Sri Swamiji would inject the subject of Kuwait into many conversations. On Monday March 21, 1994, at the Adivarapupeta ashram a week before he left his physical body, Sri Swamiji was sitting with many devotees on the roof deck in the cool evening air. Sri Swamiji again raised the subject of Kuwait and described to us gathered around him how the Dutch manager of the hotel where he was detained took such good care of Sri Swamiji and the other passengers.

Sri Swamiji often complained about the Indian government which cared little for its own citizens. Had the captive passengers been Americans, he pointed out to Americans during his 1991 visit, the citizenry and the media would not have given their government any peace until the Americans were released safely.

Before Kuwait, Sri Swamiji had repeatedly told us that he had come to prevent the world from destroying itself. He warned of the dangers of nuclear war and predicted that it would come to pass soon unless people changed their ways and came into the line of spirituality. The clues were all there and many devotees now believe that in accomplishing his mission of global peace, he absorbed the effect of a nuclear war that would have broken out over Kuwait. Shivabalayogi took upon himself the karma of a global nuclear war which the Iraqi invasion would have precipitated.

Although Sri Swamiji never directly admitted to taking on karma, he indirectly pointed in this direction. When a devotee asked whether people could share karma through physical contact, Sri Swamiji answered only if there is a soul connection. Sri Swamiji frequently describes the soul connection he has with his devotees. A close devotee who over many years had wonderful and detailed metaphysical conversations with Sri Swamiji once asked whether he had stopped world war from breaking out over Kuwait. Sri Swamiji did not answer. From his long experience of conversations with Sri Swamiji, it is this devotee’s belief that this reluctance to answer meant yes.

The most direct evidence that Sri Swamiji took on karma comes from a devotee’s experience which took place in Dehradun in the 1980’s.

Years ago I used to tape record the evening bhajans in Dehradun. Sri Swamiji knew I was taping the songs and one night he told me to come by his room early in the morning with my tape recorder. He offered to sing some songs which I could record. He was quite fit and active in those days.

Early the next morning, I entered his room and immediately noticed that Sri Swamiji looked sick and very pale. There was a look of deep worry in his eyes. I asked him whether he was unwell. He said yes, that in his meditation he had seen an atomic explosion. “I have experienced a nuclear explosion on myself” were his words. He had absorbed the destruction of an atomic explosion.

Some things changed after Sri Swamiji returned from Kuwait. He asked that devotees not be told about his physical difficulties. He gave strict instructions that if devotees inquired, those attending Sri Swamiji were to respond that Sri Swamiji was enjoying good health. He did not want the devotees to worry about him. When Sri Swamiji became very ill while touring the United States in 1991, we rearranged his schedule of programs to give him some rest. On this occasion also, he gave us strict instructions that no one was to be told about his illness or anything else other than he was simply resting. We were not even allowed to tell other devotees where he was staying. As a result of his concern about unnecessary worry, most devotees had no idea of the severity of his illnesses until his final samadhi.

Hospitalized

Although Kuwait may not fully account for the deterioration of Sri Swamiji’s health, it had a substantial impact. But to hear Sri Swamiji describe it, he was in reasonably good health when he returned from Kuwait. True, the infection in his right foot was aggravated and he later suffered complications from the influenza he contracted traveling to the United States for the 1991 tour. But he insisted that these problems were not serious. Then on August 8, 1991, he received a homeopathic injection to cure his right foot. Within a few hours it caused a violent reaction in his body which shook uncontrollably for five hours. The medicine had the effect of poisoning Sri Swamiji’s already weak body. Sri Swamiji’s kidneys, the organ that helps remove toxins from the body, were already weak and after the injection they struggled to remove the foreign substances until they shut down completely and permanently.

At the time, Sri Swamiji told a long time devotee who was visiting the ashram that if he lived through this he would travel to North India to visit her home. She asked why he used the word “if”. Sri Swamiji said it was possible that he would not live. “It is written in your mother’s nadis,” he told her.[37] Some months later when several of us American devotees were visiting him on the occasion of his fifty-seventh birthday and the publication of the book Tapas Shakti, Sri Swamiji told us repeatedly that he had been ready to leave his body then and there. It was only through the prayers of his devotees, he explained, that he was able to recover.

For three months after that injection, Sri Swamiji was so sick that he was unable to take food or water. His lungs were full of fluids his kidneys could no longer discharge, so he could not breathe properly lying down. He spent those three months sitting and leaning his weight forward on his arms.

Finally, some devotees convinced Sri Swamiji to go to the hospital and undergo dialysis. There the doctors considered three major operations, an amputation of the right foot because of its chronic infection, a kidney biopsy, and the removal of badly infected lymph nodes in the groin. However, Sri Swamiji was too weak for any operation and the accumulated list of his physical ailments too severe.

During this critical illness in late 1991, Sri Swamiji’s devotees understandably wanted more information about what was going on, and some went to the nadis to ask specific questions. One question had to do with whether he would live on, and the answer was that he would with the help of a dialysis machine. In Sanskrit, the concept of dialysis was described as a machine which washed blood.

Devotees in the United States purchased a dialysis machine and supplies for his private use and Sri Swamiji received dialysis at the ashram twice a week. With regular dialysis and rest, he slowly began to regain some strength. About a year later, in 1993, a devotee in Ireland purchased a second dialysis machine which Sri Swamiji wanted as a backup for the first. On the occasion of his hundredth dialysis treatment, he had the devotees at the ashram woken up (it was late at night), assembled in the dialysis room with him, and treated to sweets as prashad. Sri Swamiji often assured us that his need for dialysis would either end or reduce to a manageable once a week which would allow him to travel again.

But Sri Swamiji’s body remained weak. In addition to the infected right foot and twice a week dialysis, he was diabetic and extremely anemic. Sometimes there would be blood in his stools, but the doctors could never isolate the cause. He suffered greatly from his intestines which wrapped around themselves and caused severe pain from the resulting trapped gas. For over three years he suffered from coughing which often could be heard several rooms away. His failed kidneys caused sores on his legs and an itch on his skin which made him extremely uncomfortable. Periodically the infection in his foot would flare up and his body would suffer fevers and chills.

All this was kept secret from the devotees in general. But those of us who had occasion to be with Sri Swamiji privately when he had no reason to conceal his symptoms often saw his body restless and scratching, coughing and uttering “Amma” and “Abba” (meaning mother and father) with the pain in his stomach. Sometimes he was weak from the fever which racked his body periodically. But whenever Sri Swamiji gave public darshan, which he did every night without fail, he would be in complete control of his body and would not allow it to show any symptom. There were many devotees even in Bangalore who did not know how sick he was. Sri Swamiji refused to allow his body to display any reaction to pain as he patiently sat still and gave darshan and blessings, listened to the problems the devotees brought to him, and sometimes just talked in good humor.

A Hoped for Recovery

The nadis state that Sri Swamiji would cure himself with medicines he invents. The reference probably is to kaya kalpa, which Sri Swamiji underwent a third time in March to May of 1993. Sri Swamiji was planning to do the kaya kalpa a year earlier but, as he explained to us through bhava samadhi after his mahasamadhi, he concluded that his body was still too damaged to tolerate the treatment. Instead, he strengthened his physical body through a yogic technique involving the tapas of a devotee.

Sri Swamiji chose one of several devotees around India who had been receiving Sri Swamiji’s bhava samadhi for over a decade. Sri Swamiji would come in bhava upon certain devotees to give darshan, bless vibhuti, give instructions, heal afflictions, engage in conversation and answer questions. The power and blessings manifested through these devotees was not their own. It was Sri Swamiji’s tapas shakti.

In late 1992, Sri Swamiji gave detailed instructions for the construction of a hut in the middle of his ashram in Agra where his devotee was to sit for a forty-five day tapas. It may have been some form of kaya kalpa because although the devotee did not take the medicine, the forty-five day tapas was done under conditions exactly like the ayurvedic treatment. The man remained in Sri Swamiji’s bhava for the entire forty-five day tapas and continuously manifested all of Sri Swamiji’s characteristics, including such details as the daily massages which Sri Swamiji received and the minute quantities of water he was allowed to drink. Despite a meager diet, the man in Sri Swamiji’s bhava miraculously retained his stout weight. Through the bhava samadhi and tapas shakti of Sri Swamiji, the devotee completed the tapas on December 30, 1992.

There are many witnesses to this forty-five day tapas in Sri Swamiji’s bhava, and immediately after completing it the devotee received instructions to travel to Bangalore to visit Sri Swamiji. There he was gradually brought out of the divine bhava. While in Bangalore, this devotee continued to receive Sri Swamiji’s bhava several times, and devotees at the ashram who had served Sri Swamiji personally for many years became convinced it was their beloved Swamiji talking and blessing through this bhava. The devotee would come out of his room in Sri Swamiji’s bhava and sit and say to the devotees “Come on, call all the others,” then speak just like Sri Swamiji would speak. The devotees enjoyed this darshan very much because this man’s body was strong and they could talk with Sri Swamiji for a long time. They could not take such time with Sri Swamiji’s own body because it was weak and needed rest. It was during this visit that Sri Swamiji (in his own body) stated that when he was in bhava upon this man, he had Sri Swamiji’s full powers. After Sri Swamiji dropped his own physical body, he explained to us through bhava samadhi that through this devotee’s service and the forty-five day tapas, Sri Swamiji’s own health improved to where he was able to undergo kaya kalpa in March of 1993.

Kaya kalpa requires strict seclusion in a cool and completely dark room. The windows in Sri Swamiji’s room at the Bangalore ashram were covered to block out all light and arrangements made for dialysis in the dark. Sri Swamiji was covered by a sheet as he held out his arm for the technician to insert the needles into his vein in the light from a small flashlight. His physicians monitored his vital signs daily. The nightly bhajans were moved to the opposite side of the ashram grounds to afford more quiet. But even so, we know that Sri Swamiji continued to be involved in the ashram affairs to some degree and he even accepted telephone calls from some devotees. He completed the forty-five day intense portion of the treatment on Sunday, May 9 (Mother’s Day) of 1993. Even though he once again had not followed the strict procedures exactly, devotees noticed a substantial physical improvement which increased as Sri Swamiji rested over the next months.

Sri Swamiji remained on dialysis twice a week. However, the kaya kalpa had improved his health and he started planning trips around India to test the strength of his body. Even before the kaya kalpa treatment, he had gone on a one-day picnic by the Cauvery River in early 1993. After the August 7 function that year, he took three bus loads full of devotees on a three-day picnic, bathing in the Cauvery three times, including at its source at Talakaveri. He enjoyed Talakaveri so much that he returned there later that year with a small group of devotees. He visited devotees in Hyderabad over a longer period by arranging for dialysis treatments in that city.

Sri Swamiji was collecting medicines for another kaya kalpa treatment, possibly in late 1994 or early 1995. By the time I arrived in Bangalore to spend my four-month sabbatical with Sri Swamiji, just before his birthday on the 24th of January, 1994, the foundation was being laid out for a new building at the Bangalore ashram which would serve as a kaya kalpa facility. It is designed to have underground rooms in which many people can undergo kaya kalpa treatment simultaneously. Sri Swamiji dedicated its foundation on that birthday and he was to have been its first “patient.”

On the evening of that fifty-ninth birthday, devotees from around India made plans to celebrate Sri Swamiji’s birthday the following year, his 60th which is a major event in India. I was invited to attend on behalf of the American devotees. The plans included a thulabharam, weighing Sri Swamiji with silver and donating several times his weight to complete the gopuram (domes) of the Brahma-Vishnu-Maheshwara temple at the ashram, to construct the new kaya kalpa building, and to fund the general activities of the Bangalore ashram. Our discussions completed, we proceeded upstairs to Sri Swamiji’s rooms for his blessings.

The evening before his birthdays, Sri Swamiji would invite many devotees to gather in his private darshan room and he would cut one of several birthday cakes he was given each year. Many devotees were already with him when we arrived after our meeting, and in all there must have been some thirty of us gathered in his room. We reported our discussions and plans. One of the devotees suggested using the thulabharam silver to make a statue of Sri Swamiji which could be installed in the temple so that Sri Swamiji could give local devotees darshan while traveling abroad. Much to our surprise, Sri Swamiji readily agreed to the idea.

Then Sri Swamiji had great fun calling on people to pledge kilograms of silver for the thulabharam. He teased devotees, told them to make donations, and if he thought the pledge was for too few kilograms, he suggested a larger amount, to the great amusement of everyone in the room. Each time a new devotee came into the room for darshan, Sri Swamiji would call someone to get the book in which the pledge records were kept. The subject could only smile weakly as his colleagues around him who had already pledged teased the new fellow mercilessly. There were good feelings and humor everywhere. Swamiji made a side joke to a devotee, “I have made four kg in one minute!” We all enjoyed the show immensely, knowing full well that Sri Swamiji had never asked anything for himself.[38]

I joked with Swamiji that he should put on a lot of strength and weight so that we would not have to weigh him many times with the silver. He replied no, his body was too weak and old and that would not be possible. Somewhat concerned, I pressed him to be with us for many more birthdays. He did not respond. Then a short while later as he was cutting the cake, he pleasantly surprised us all by saying that he would be around to cut another forty birthday cakes. He repeated this several times. Another devotee pointedly asked him in Telugu, “Do you really mean you will stay in this body for another forty years?” Sri Swamiji responded very emphatically, “Yes.”

After his mahasamadhi, Sri Swamiji told us that although he gave many indications that he might leave his body, he played a drama about cutting another forty birthday cakes to keep us from unnecessarily worrying. He already knew by the time of his fifty-ninth birthday that his body would not last long. A few months earlier he had asked a devotee to undergo another forty-five day tapas, but because the devotees did not understand the urgency of Sri Swamiji’s request, they delayed too long. Again through bhava, Sri Swamiji told us that had the second forty-five day tapas been done, he could have stayed in his body some time more.

With hindsight, we can recognize many indications which at the time were overshadowed by our hopes and Sri Swamiji’s statements that he would be fine. Sri Swamiji indicated to a devotee that he felt like his mission was over (presumably, in his physical body), but he worried that his disciples were not coming up as fast as he expected. In the meantime, Sri Swamiji authorized several devotees in the United States and England to initiate people into dhyana in Sri Swamiji’s physical absence. He assured us that his astral presence was sufficient and he chided,

“Sri Swamiji has taught others how to initiate people. So why don’t they travel around to all those countries? If Sri Swamiji wants to bring all those people into the line of devotion he’ll do it through his devotees. What is the meaning of the Trust? The Trust is supposed to bring people into this line of devotion, initiate them into meditation, teach them about Sri Swamiji, give them the vibhuti, and things like this. You cannot expect Sri Swamiji to travel to all the countries of the world. So the respective Trusts will have to do this work.”

Sri Swamiji gave indications as early as late 1991 when he was critically ill and the devotees at the Bangalore ashram were praying so hard for his recovery. One devotee had a dream in which Lord Hanuman appeared as a green colored monkey. Normally, Lord Hanuman is depicted wearing fine clothes, a crown, and precious jewelry, but in this dream he appeared dressed very plainly. Lord Hanuman spoke to the devotee in Telugu: “It is being said that God is dying.” The devotee understood that Lord Hanuman was referring to Swamiji and that he was dying. This realization shocked the devotee who woke up with a start. it was 4 A.M., early in the morning when dreams are considered true.

Over the last months before his mahasamadhi, Sri Swamiji often sang a song about getting onto a ship and the ship leaving the port. Many times he would sweetly sing the song to two of his close devotees who lived and served with him. They knew that the song generally meant that he was leaving, and when the ship leaves, you either catch it or you are left behind. Sri Swamiji was teasing the two devotees telling them the boat was leaving and he was leaving with it. Whenever he started singing the song they protested, “No, don’t sing that song.” But he would keep singing that song.

A few devotees were told well in advance that Swamiji would soon drop his body. One devotee relates as follows.

I received my invitation to the 1994 birthday function about a month in advance, in late December of 1993. Some time later I put a question to Swamiji in meditation: “Swamiji, if you call me I am coming. Otherwise, I am not coming. I will just send my donation.”

That same night while resting after meditation, Swamiji came to me in a vision and said “In three weeks from now I am going.” He gave me some instructions on how I was to proceed to Bangalore, but these were His only words. The message of the vision was very clear. I calculated the day. According to what He told me, Swamiji would leave His body on February 2nd.

I traveled to Bangalore and was there for the birthday function on January 24. I stood before Swamiji but I could not speak to Him. I know the meaning of His message and I know that He knew I knew because He had given the message. Generally Swami would speak a few words to me. That day He did not speak. At any moment tear drops would have come from His eyes and mine, but both of us controlled our emotions. I just said, “Swamiji, I have come. Tomorrow I am going.” He just nodded His head. I did not want to be standing in front of Him during uncontrollable moments so I left.

I knew, but the others did not. Everyone was telling stories about how Swamiji would live for another forty years, that He was to travel to Delhi, and the plans to celebrate His sixtieth birthday. I kept quiet. Swamiji years before had forbidden me to speak to anyone about my experience in meditation. Only after His mahasamadhi was I given permission to speak.

The date proved to the March 28. All that I can conclude from the additional month and a half was that Swamiji left the actual date floating.

After Sri Swamiji recovered from the worst of his 1991 sickness, he told us quite emphatically that it was only through the prayers of his devotees that he managed to stay in his body. This remained a constant theme throughout his illnesses, his last trip to Adivarapupeta in March of 1994, and also throughout the five days between leaving his body and its internment in the Samadhi at the Adivarapupeta ashram. The simple meaning is that because of his love for the devotees, Sri Swamiji compelled his unfortunate body to keep working long past when it should have given up in August of 1991. Sri Swamiji suffered for almost three more years before he was forced to drop the physical body. Yet we did not fully understand what he meant when he told us his body was pretty much done, but for his devotees’ prayers.

The Last Tour: 1994 Mahashivaratri in Adivarapupeta

Mahashivaratri in Adivarapupeta, 1994.

In January of 1994, plans were made and instructions given for Sri Swamiji’s long awaited return to his native village of Adivarapupeta for Mahashivaratri. When I received Sri Swamiji’s permission to spend my four-month sabbatical with him, he promised to take me traveling to the different ashrams in India. After I arrived in January, he told me he would drag me with him everywhere he went, and he purchased my airplane ticket from Bangalore to Hyderabad, then a ticket in his own compartment on the overnight train to Kakinada. The plan was to leave Bangalore that March 5 with a handful of devotees. He would stay in Hyderabad a few days, then Adivarapupeta for Mahashivaratri, then return to Bangalore around March 15. Then Sri Swamiji planned to fly to Delhi and visit devotees in Agra, Dehradun and Jhansi.

Adivarapupeta is where Sri Swamiji was born, where he sat in tapas for twelve years, the site of his first ashram, and where he gave life to the Ardhanareeshwara Lingam, a naturally occurring Shivalingam which has the features of Shiva, Parvati, Ganesha and Subramanyan on its right, left, front and back respectively. After completing tapas, Sri Swamiji remained in Adivarapupeta until he accepted an invitation to visit devotees in Mysore State in April of 1963. Since then, he had returned to his native Adivarapupeta annually for a month around the Mahashivaratri festival, the most auspicious time of year for the devotees of Lord Shiva. The night of Mahashivaratri depends upon the lunar calendar, but it usually takes place around March. On this sacred night, Lord Shiva’s devotees sing bhajans until daybreak and at the Adivarapupeta ashram that evening, a traditional marriage of Lord Shiva and Goddess Parvati is performed. Sri Swamiji’s devotees prepare a mass feeding for the afternoon before Mahashivaratri and another for the day after when many thousands of people would gather at the ashram for Sri Swamiji’s darshan and to eat his holy prashad.

A few days before our scheduled departure, Sri Swamiji was receiving his last dialysis treatment at the Bangalore ashram. There was a special room on the ground floor where the dialysis machine was set up with its own filtered water supply and electricity. Swamiji would lie down on a bed and through two needles in his left arm his blood supply was routed through the dialysis machine which methodically and mechanically filtered out the impurities which had accumulated since the previous treatment. The treatments took five hours and Sri Swamiji enjoyed company to pass the time, to press his legs, and towards the end of the treatment, to help keep him awake to keep his blood pressure up. I was encouraged to stay with Swamiji during treatments. We would monitor Swamiji’s condition, steady his left arm when he coughed, press Sri Swamiji’s legs, and periodically help him sit up and rub his back. When he dozed off, we would wake him up. When his blood pressure dropped, we would raise his legs and press them more vigorously. He would talk and joke with us, sing songs, and feed us prashad.

On this last occasion in Bangalore, he was in his fourth hour of dialysis when the subject of our upcoming trip to Adivarapupeta came up. Sri Swamiji told us the story of how the devotees in his native place never wanted him to leave Adivarapupeta, so he promised to come back every year for a month during Mahashivaratri. Sri Swamiji kept his promise and returned to Adivarapupeta every year until his hospitalization late in 1991. Poor health kept him from traveling in 1992 or 1993, so this trip in March of 1994 would be his first in three years.

I had not been to Adivarapupeta and did not know what to expect there. Sri Swamiji teased me that Adivarapupeta was a “small village.” He described how the crowd would be so huge and excited that they will tear out his arms! Swamiji insisted that they loved and missed him so much. He told us that they did not want to let him go when he left for Dodballapur (Bangalore) in March of 1963, so many devotees followed him as far as Madras. Swamiji compared their devotion to those of Lord Rama’s countrymen. When Rama left Ayodhya, throngs of those who loved him wanted to follow him into exile. Rama had to slip away.

Swamiji started singing a song. Tears started running down his cheeks. Through the tears he kept telling us how much they loved him in his native village and he loved them. I could only keep rubbing Sri Swamiji’s legs, awed by his expression of the very best of humanity. We all became very quiet and reverent.

Sri Swamiji left Bangalore for Adivarapupeta on Saturday morning, March 5, 1994. He was very weak and had to be carried in a chair down the stairs from his room above the meditation hall, then down more stairs to the car waiting to take him to the airport. As he left the hall, he told two of the ashram residents not to quarrel but take their problems to Akka. At the bottom of the stairs, he turned around to take a look at the ashram building, something he normally never did. As his car pulled out of the driveway, he usually would smile at the devotees. This time he just looked back towards his room.

As is his custom before and after journeys, Sri Swamiji visited his mother’s Samadhi at the nearby Bannerghatta Road ashram. There he was overheard saying, “Already time is up. I am weak.” He shed tears. The devotees who saw this privately wondered whether Sri Swamiji should travel, but they knew his indomitable will power.

We all hoped and prayed that his visit to the spiritually powerful place of his birth and tapas, and his planned baths in the ocean and the holy Godavari River would be another significant step in the continued recovery of Sri Swamiji’s body. Then he would travel to North India where he would bathe in the holy Ganges River. Sri Swamiji assured us that the worst was over, and we wanted to believe the best and prayed for a miraculous recovery.

Sri Swamiji flew to Hyderabad where he quietly stayed with a close devotee for three days. Sri Swamiji’s sickness continued and his body remained weak from fever and experienced great pain in his stomach. Even so, he gave darshan each evening without revealing the seriousness of his condition. Sri Swamiji underwent a very successful dialysis treatment at a dialysis clinic in Hyderabad, so everything was set for his trip to Adivarapupeta.

On Tuesday, March 8, 1994, Swamiji and a handful of devotees left Hyderabad by overnight train to Kakinada where he was received by a small group of devotees the next morning. After a short rest, Swamiji was driven to Adivarapupeta that afternoon after the heat of the day had passed.

The reception at the tiny village was impressive. A crowd of several hundred people waited for Swamiji at the village entrance. School children were lined along the dirt road, a band of drummers made a stirring sound, and fireworks exploded in celebration. A procession preceded Swamiji’s car as it slowly made its way through the main street in the village, having to stop often to allow villagers to do arthi and break coconuts in his honor. The procession continued onto the side road which leads to the small Shivabalayogi ashram immediately behind the village. This is the site of the Dhyana Mandir (meditation temple) which was constructed for Sri Swamiji’s protection and where he sat for almost ten years of tapas. There were beautiful bhajans sung in Sri Swamiji’s honor that night at the little ashram. The Adivarapupeta bhajan group is highly regarded for its skill and devotion, and rightly so.

The following night was Mahashivaratri. Sri Swamiji’s body was weak and we had to carry him downstairs in an armchair so that he could give darshan during the annual celebration of the wedding of Shiva and Parvati. Police had to control the devotional enthusiasm of devotees who wanted to pranam before Sri Swamiji and touch his holy feet. The crowd had already become much larger because word was getting around that Sri Swamiji had returned. By the next day’s darshan and mass feeding, thousands had gathered.

Sri Swamiji Recovers from a Difficult Dialysis

The next evening, we drove Sri Swamiji to Kakinada for a dialysis treatment which proved to be extremely difficult. His blood pressure dropped to dangerously low levels and he had to be put on oxygen. Unlike dialysis treatments at the ashram or in Hyderabad, visitors were restricted at this clinic. Those of us nervously gathered outside could only imagine the worst when we saw the agitation of the physicians and technicians. There was concern whether Swamiji should be given the blood transfusion which had been locally arranged.[39] Periodic power outages, common in India, and the resulting complete darkness were unnerving. When we were individually allowed to visit Sri Swamiji for a few minutes, we saw his pitifully weak body in great pain, an oxygen mask over his face.

The dialysis was stopped a little early and we had to carry Sri Swamiji to his car. He had no strength to move any limbs. We had trouble getting his inert body into the back seat of his car and when I bent one knee, he yelled that his leg was being twisted and would break. He was taken to a devotee’s house in Kakinada where he was to stay and rest. We lifted him out of the car into a chair and took him to the first available bedroom. Oxygen was brought and we reverently stood or knelt quietly, many of us with tears in our eyes at having to witness the pitifully sick condition of his body. We feared for the worst, and it was suggested that the ashrams should be called immediately so they could pray for Sri Swamiji. But the consensus was to wait until the next day.

Sri Swamiji the next morning was a completely different person: He was energetic and enthusiastic. It was as if the nightmare of the previous night had never happened. A plastic surgeon came to examine him, assured us that Sri Swamiji’s body was being well treated, and approved of his bathing in the ocean and the Godavari River. This surgeon was so affected by Sri Swamiji’s grace that he offered to immediately attend to Sri Swamiji, including driving to Adivarapupeta, should any complication develop. From then on through the day of the final samadhi, each time the surgeon attended Sri Swamiji, tears would come to the doctor’s eyes.

Our almost panicked concerns of the night before proved to be unwarranted by Sri Swamiji’s strength and cheerfulness the following morning. Swamiji wanted to go bathing in the sea and he gestured how he would get good energy from the sea bath. Despite near physical death the evening before, our talk was all about Swamiji’s continued stay in the Adivarapupeta area and plans for bathing not only in the ocean at Kakinada, but also in the Godavari River at Rajahmundry. That night, Saturday the 12th of March, we carried Sri Swamiji to the rooftop deck at the house to enjoy the pleasantly cooler evening air. About a dozen or so devotees sat around where Sri Swamiji was lying, taking turns fanning him while we all enjoyed his darshan and conversation. It was like old times.

One man came for his first darshan of Sri Swamiji. He had been visiting Shirdi Sai Baba’s ashram in Shirdi when he heard a voice say that after Mahashivaratri, he would receive the darshan of a very great person. When the man turned to see who had spoken, there was no one there. After he returned to Kakinada, he found out where Shivabalayogi was staying and came for darshan. This man was extremely well versed in many spiritual traditions and he began to ask Sri Swamiji questions. So began a lengthy conversation in which the man asked all sorts of questions about the various spiritual traditions he had studied throughout his life, the Vedas, the Bhagavad Gita, the Bible, the Koran, and even the shaman traditions of the Native Americans. As the man was leaving, he told me that Sri Swamiji had answered all his questions to leave him with the strong message that we may pray to the God which is to our liking. No matter how we worship God, our devotion goes to the Almighty.[40]

I returned to the roof deck where Sri Swamiji was still with a few devotees. I asked him who it was who spoke to the man in Shirdi about meeting a great person in Kakinada after Shivaratri. Sri Swamiji said that he told the devotee to meditate to find out the answer. Then he added, “Who called Swamiji into tapas?”

On Sunday the 13th of March, Sri Swamiji and about thirty devotees went to the beach at Kakinada to bathe in the ocean of the Bay of Bengal. When Sri Swamiji walked into the calm waters, they ebbed backwards as if coaxing Sri Swamiji further in. After some time, a passing fishing boat was hailed and Sri Swamiji insisted upon a short boat ride. After puja to the waters, Sri Swamiji sent most of us devotees back to the house and he remained sitting by the ocean until the gentle flow of the tide lapped his sacred feet. Afterwards, we observed that he really had gained physical strength.

The remaining dialysis treatments in Kakinada were completed with no difficulty and little discomfort. The supervising nephrologist proved to be extremely qualified and experienced. Sri Swamiji quite properly had every confidence that he could safely continue dialysis in Kakinada indefinitely.

On Wednesday the 16th of March, Mr. Ramanna, a devotee in Rajahmundry organized a motor boat to take Sri Swamiji and his devotees to a nearby sand island in the middle of the Godavari River which is some five kilometers wide at this point. The boat made two trips, the second time bringing devotees from Adivarapupeta. We all bathed with Sri Swamiji in the sacred waters amidst playfulness and the bhava samadhi of several devotees. He performed puja to the river and even returned to its waters to take lunch there. Upon his return to Adivarapupeta, he said that he enjoyed the river so much that he wanted an overnight picnic and that a devotee would come forward to make the necessary arrangements.

When Sri Swamiji returned to Adivarapupeta, he laid the foundation of a new building for the weavers’ society. Almost everyone in Adivarapupeta is engaged in the production of women’s sarees and men’s lunghis. On any day, one can see colorful, long loops of cotton being washed in the canal, or four saree lengths worth of yarn stretched on racks laid in the village streets, or the villagers expertly weaving the cloth on the hand looms in their homes. This was Sri Swamiji’s own occupation as a child, and after he completed tapas he worked hard to better the economic lives of his fellow villagers. He personally donated land and materials to construct houses for many poor families in the village. It was Sri Swamiji who reorganized the weavers into a cooperative society so they had more economic power to buy the raw cotton and sell the finished sarees and lunghis. The society had outgrown its existing building, and on Thursday the 17th of March, Sri Swamiji laid the foundation for a new one.

After the dedication was complete, the society members invited Sri Swamiji to give darshan in the existing society building. It was another hot day and the shade inside the building was refreshing. They laid down blankets and sheets on the cool, stone floor where Sri Swamiji could lie down and rest. He talked sweetly and affectionately with his fellow villagers and stayed several hours in their company. All the time they reverently pressed his legs and fanned his body. The bond they had with Sri Swamiji and those precious hours were something very special to witness.

Bathing in the ocean at Kakinada, March 13, 1994.

“I Have Returned Victorious.”

During the early afternoon of Friday the 18th of March, Sri Swamiji began to talk with the Adivarapupeta ashram committee members about constructing a new temple to replace the Dhyana Mandir. The soil around Adivarapupeta is very fertile but unstable, and the water table is only five feet below the surface. The Dhyana Mandir had been built hastily in 1950 and its walls were cracking ominously. Sri Swamiji had wanted construction to start in 1991, the last time he had been in Adivarapupeta for Mahashivaratri, but the work could not begin because he left before he could consecrate its foundation.

Now that Sri Swamiji had returned, he gave instructions for the new temple footprint to be measured out on the ground that Friday afternoon. The temple design was adapted from plans already drawn for the construction of a temple at the Bangalore ashram to Sati,[41] who Swamiji tells us is the mother of Ganesha. The new sanctuary space would measure twenty feet by twenty feet and it would be constructed around and over the Dhyana Mandir which measured only twelve feet square. When the new sanctuary walls and roof were completed, the Dhyana Mandir was to be carefully demolished so as not to disturb the Shivalingam and Devi inside the sanctuary.[42]

At ten o’clock that Friday night, Sri Swamiji was alone in his bedroom on the second floor of the Adivarapupeta ashram. He got up and came down the stairs to wake up the sleeping people. “Come On,” he told them, “Let us do the shankusthapana now.” He wanted them to prepare for the formal dedication of the foundation for the new temple. Nothing had been readied for such a ritual, so the devotees had to scurry about to call the priest and gather the necessary items.

We were roused out of our sleep with the news that Sri Swamiji wanted to dedicate the temple foundation that night. Outside, several devotees were finishing the hand digging of a six foot deep pit for the Northeast comer of the building. About thirty people gathered, coconuts were husked, and the various puja items collected. Sri Swamiji came down from his room, sat in a chair facing East and the pit, the Dhyana Mandir behind his right shoulder, and the rituals began some time after midnight.

Some of the devotees who were carrying out Swamiji’s instructions looked around for a time keeper. Noticing my watch, they asked me to tell them when it was 1:47. That was the exact time Swamiji wanted for the foundation to be laid. Some concrete was being mixed and the preparatory puja to the ceremonial first brick was being performed the time approached.

As the appointed minute arrived, the concrete was trowelled in a corner of the pit and the brick and various offerings placed inside. Each of us put down some cement, threw some sand, and poured coconut water as Sri Swamiji watched. I believe the photographs I took of him that night are the last before his final samadhi. I took two of them standing behind Sri Swamiji and they miraculously show the Shiva-Shakti energy which he was returning to the deities in the Dhyana Mandir.

Upon completion of the dedication, Sri Swamiji was heard to say “I have returned victorious.” He told a devotee that the Goddess Devi in the Dhyana Mandir was anxious for Sri Swamiji to complete the new temple.

Septic Shock and a Miraculous Dialysis

A young woman and her sister were among the devotees from Bangalore who traveled to Adivarapupeta in 1994 to be with Sri Swamiji for Mahashivaratri. She lived at the Bangalore ashram where she did all sorts of work like helping with the cooking and taking care of and doing puja to the deities in the temple. In the middle of March when she left Adivarapupeta to return to Bangalore, she had this strong feeling she had left something behind. She thought it might be something in her luggage, but when she searched through her belongings she found everything there. In hindsight, her sense of loss proved to be prophetic. This same week, a devotee in Seattle who had no knowledge of just how seriously ill Sri Swamiji was, had a dream that Sri Swamiji left his body.

In the evening of Monday, the 21st of March, Sri Swamiji gave darshan on the ashram roof in Adivarapupeta. The cooler night breeze was a relief after the intense tropical heat and we delighted in his presence. A few long time devotees from nearby villages and towns came for his darshan, and Sri Swamiji talked with several of them as he lay on a mattress covered in blankets. For some reason, he asked a devotee to translate some of his comments into English so I could understand. He was talking about the Dutch manager of the Kuwait City hotel where he and the other airline passengers had been detained by the Iraqi military. He told us how well the manager had taken care of Sri Swamiji and the other passengers. As he talked about other devotees, tears came to his eyes.

Shortly after he returned to his room downstairs, he again became critically ill. He had cut his left foot before we left Bangalore and the wound was not healing. He was going into septic shock from the infection. That first night, four devotees stayed up all night trying to keep him comfortable. I found out about it the next morning when they told me to be prepared to spend the next night taking care of Sri Swamiji. His condition was very serious, but we felt we should not tell the other devotees because Swamiji would not want them to worry. Our precaution was unnecessary. Many people of the area, having seen Sri Swamiji giving darshan and his weak physical condition, had already concluded that he had returned home to leave his body.

That night, Tuesday night, I was to be available. I started to sleep with the hope that Sri Swamiji would be all right and the others would not need to call on me. Among other reasons, I was afraid to stay up with Swamiji because I had no idea of how to take care of him. I did not know the language and I do not like the feeling of being helpless when there is work to be done. Within an hour I was called. Shortly afterwards, two devotees had to leave for Kakinada in the dead of night to find more oxygen. How they managed to drive through dense fog to safely return with the oxygen is a miracle in itself Meanwhile, four of us stayed in Sri Swamiji’s room, the three others often dozing off because this was their second night without sleep.

Sri Swamiji had a temperature of 102 to 103 degrees Fahrenheit. His body was miserably uncomfortable, unable to sleep from the pains and delirious from the fever. He would mutter “Amma” and “Abba” as if from the pain. Periodically his body would shiver uncontrollably in the tropical heat even though we covered him with several woolen blankets. He was too weak to sit up, so one of us would stay on his bed inside the mosquito netting to help him sit up every fifteen minutes or so. He was too uncomfortable to remain still and sitting up helped relieve some of the pain from his incessant coughing. We massaged and gently stroked his back, legs and arms to help soothe his body. When the electricity failed, which was often, we suffered in the oppressive heat and fanned his feverish body. We could not refuse him when he asked for small sips of cold water.

At one point while I was on the bed with him, Sri Swamiji exclaimed something and one of the other devotees immediately came inside the mosquito netting and pleaded with him. She later told me that he had exclaimed that he could not take the pain any more and wanted to leave, so she pleaded with him to stay. She reminded him of his mission, how far he had come, and how much was left undone. She even implored Sri Swamiji to use his powers to heal himself, something which Sri Swamiji repeatedly said he would never do. Sri Swamiji simply promised that he would not leave.

As the morning light filled the darkness, we made plans to evacuate Swamiji as quickly and quietly as possible. He was scheduled for dialysis in Kakinada and he needed the medical facilities that were available there. We hastily packed Swamiji’s belongings, threw our own belongings together, then carried him to his waiting car. I still remember looking through the car windows at the concerned and puzzled faces of the other devotees as we drove Swamiji’s car out of the ashram and through the village.

We took Swamiji to a devotee’s house where the nephrologist examined the seriously ill body of the God realized yogi. He assured us that Swamiji would be fine, although his condition was serious. Sri Swamiji’s blood pressure was too low to attempt dialysis and the infection in the left foot needed to be brought under control. He prescribed strong antibiotics to be administered immediately and postponed dialysis for a day. Despite the antibiotics, Swamiji’s left foot became badly swollen that afternoon. Wednesday night was again very difficult for Swamiji and we again stayed up all night trying to keep him comfortable and helping him sit up frequently to have his back rubbed. He was unable to sleep and could only slumber with his eyes half open. Yet this night was a vast improvement over the previous two.

Several hundred kilometers away in Bangalore early that Thursday morning, the 24th of March, one of the women who lived and worked at the Bangalore ashram saw Swamiji decorated with flowers which covered him almost completely. Swamiji was seated normally and she saw lots of people gathered around him. She woke up and felt an overwhelming sorrow. She just cried and could not understand what had happened. What she saw in the dream is exactly how Sri Swamiji’s body looked the next week during the five days it was giving darshan before being interred in the Samadhi.

In Kakinada that same Thursday morning, Swamiji was scheduled to have dialysis. His attending physician came and measured his blood pressure. It was 80 systolic, much too low from the minimum 120 needed for dialysis. After some concern and discussion, Sri Swamiji announced his decision to leave for dialysis. He was carried in a chair to his car, but when he arrived at the clinic something remarkable happened. He refused a wheelchair and smartly walked into the dialysis room.

Sri Swamiji’s last dialysis was miraculous. It was like his amazing recovery after we almost lost his body during the first dialysis in Kakinada. We were waiting outside and immediately began to hear reports of how well the dialysis was proceeding, how strong Swamiji was (including sufficient blood pressure), and how cheerful he was. News came that Swamiji wanted to go bathing in the ocean immediately after dialysis and that we should be prepared for the picnic.

Dialysis treatments take about five hours and Sri Swamiji started at about ten that morning. Satisfied he was safe, we left to have lunch. Upon returning to the clinic, the reports were still glowing. The nephrologist was overcome by Sri Swamiji’s grace and would personally look in on how his divine patient was doing, something not at all necessary for routine dialysis treatments. Sri Swamiji’s presence was so wonderful that the nephrologist, usually serious at the clinic, was seen broadly smiling, causing his patients to remark “What is going on today, doctor? You are smiling.” The other hospital staff and patients were similarly affected and there was great cheerfulness.

A woman was already on dialysis when Swamiji arrived. She and her son who was keeping her company were very affected by Sri Swamiji’s darshan. She complained to Swamiji that she was very tired of living with the dialysis and wanted to give up. Swamiji assured her to continue and that there would come a time when she would no longer need it. Over the course of hours, she asked Swamiji many questions, and the result was a beautiful question and answer conversation between the woman and the mahayogi, both undergoing dialysis, their beds separated by only ten feet. Some vibhuti was found and Sri Swamiji blessed it for her. When the woman left the clinic after her treatment, she was radiantly happy, giving namaskars in gratitude to everyone.

We went inside to visit Sri Swamiji. He was smiling and his joyful, confident presence was obvious. He raised and flexed his right arm in a gesture to show how strong he was. He thumped his chest saying his heart was strong. His body had completely changed from the helplessly weak condition we had witnessed over the last three days. Despite the critical problems of his physical body, Swamiji’s concerns were to keep us cheered up. Once again, it was like old times.

After the other patient had finished her dialysis, several of us were allowed to go into the dialysis room together. We were about eight or ten sitting around Sri Swamiji’s bed as the machine pumped and cleaned his blood. Swamiji was talking in Telugu with the others and in their conversation I could recognize the names of other devotees. Sri Swamiji shed tears, and we helped wipe them from his cheeks.

There was no bathing in the ocean after this dialysis. It was nearing darkness when Sri Swamiji returned to the house in Kakinada. Meanwhile in Bangalore that night, Thursday night the 24th of March, a devotee began to have several experiences which she considered ominous. She had a dream in which Swamiji was lying down. Then he got up, called her closer, and hit her hard on the back in a blessing. That Sunday during the full moon puja in the ashram temple, she felt someone approaching her from behind. It was very hot, like a flame. She could not see anything but she could feel the current hit her. Then on Monday, the day Sri Swamiji left his body, she felt very sick and could not sit. She could feel that Swamiji’s body was suffering.

Friday, March 25, 1994

Early the next morning, ending about 6 or 6:30 A.M. on Friday, March 25, Sri Swamiji had a dream which he related as follows:

Two people were with Swamiji, the three of them holding each other’s arms to form a triangle. One appeared to have the face of a monkey, the other that of a crocodile, although both had human forms. They were making Swamiji rise up. Swamiji’s mother was there and she was shouting “Where are you going?” as if warning. Swamiji felt very light and happy. They took Swamiji far away, past many planets and worlds.

They came to a planet filled with great light. They were just about to enter this luminous world when the crocodile-faced person blew onto Swamiji’s face. [Sri Swamiji explained that there is no air in space, so this fellow made a mistake blowing air onto Swamiji.] The whiff of air was enough to separate them, and Swamiji began to fall backwards from where he had come.

Swamiji was falling very fast, but the distance was so great that it took him a long time. He was looking for a place to land. He wanted a place between a river and the sea.

At this point in the dream, Sri Swamiji was woken up accidentally. When devotees came with his breakfast, he described his dream in detail, complaining how he had been disturbed and woken up.

Swamiji narrated this dream several times that day. After his mahasamadhi, he explained that the dream was about two soldiers of Yama, the God of Death, trying to take Sri Swamiji’s soul from his body. Although Yama has no power over a yogi, the dream was a clue.

That Friday morning Sri Swamiji’s badly infected left foot was operated on and thoroughly cleaned of all infected tissue. The surgery was done without anesthetic and after the operation, Sri Swamiji walked on the heavily bandaged foot without displaying any discomfort.

Swamiji returned to the devotee’s house in Kakinada where several of us gathered to discuss what was the best course of action for his health. Most of us wanted to see him taken to Bangalore or Hyderabad because the possibility was great that the infection in his left foot was spreading and the situation was very serious. But there were good arguments in favor of him remaining in Kakinada: The dialysis there was excellent; the two specialists devoted and qualified; Swamiji had better opportunities for quiet rest in the small town; and there was the hope that Sri Swamiji’s continued presence near his native village would be beneficial for his recovery. However, the more comprehensive availability of medical facilities in a larger city prompted us to raise the subject with Swamiji. When we suggested that his condition was very serious, that he might need additional surgery, and there were more medical resources available in Bangalore or Hyderabad, Sri Swamiji responded: “No Bangalore. No Hyderabad. No Adivarapupeta. Kakinada.”

Swamiji told us to wait until the surgeon changed the dressing on the foot the next day and, if the wound was healing properly, which Swamiji assured us would happen quickly, he expected to remain in Kakinada for two or three months. Swamiji expressed his confidence that the plastic surgeon would heal his left foot and assured everyone that he would be all right in Kakinada. He added that be wanted to stay near Adivarapupeta so he could monitor progress on the new temple construction. He would rest and recuperate, but he would visit the ashram for an hour every ten days or so.

That same Friday afternoon, some of us who had traveled from Bangalore with Swamiji had made plans, with his permission, to leave and return home. Sri Swamiji had originally indicated that his trip to Adivarapupeta would last ten days, but it had been almost three weeks since we set out. I was not looking forward to an indefinite stay without anything to do when I had work to do for Swamiji in Bangalore. When it was mentioned to Swamiji that I was thinking about asking for permission to return to Bangalore, he gave instructions that I was to immediately leave that night with the others. Finally, Sri Swamiji instructed the last remaining devotee from Bangalore, (other than Swamiji’s attending physician) to join the group returning to Bangalore.

His Holiness gave us specific instructions not to tell anyone about his physical problems. We were to tell devotees that Swamiji had decided to stay in Kakinada for a month or two. The only exceptions Swamiji identified by name, and these were to be given the details because Swamiji wanted them to arrange for the necessary funds for his expenses. Finally, Swamiji told two of the departing devotees, to attend to their businesses in Bangalore and then return to Swamiji in Kakinada in about ten days. He would give instructions later whether I was to return with them.

Somewhat stunned by the rapid turn of events and Swamiji’s instructions to return to Bangalore, we took the overnight train to Hyderabad, spent the day there with devotees, then caught an overnight bus to Bangalore. Although we knew that Sri Swamiji’s condition was still serious, it never occurred to us that he would not recover. When we arrived at the Bangalore ashram we assured everyone that Swamiji was just resting and would be fine.

On the same Friday night we left Kakinada, a devotee in the United States had a dream about a death in his family. Sri Swamiji used to stay at this devotee’s house in a special room set aside for that purpose. After each night’s meditation program, Swamiji would come back to the house, take dinner in his room, then typically call the devotee into his room where they would chat for 45 minutes or so. In the dream, Swamjji was in the house and the devotee was called to the room after dinner and was chatting with Swamiji for 30-45 minutes. Then Swamiji said good night, blessed him and said, “I will see you tomorrow.” The devotee went upstairs and at this point in his dream comes to know that there is a death in the family. He goes from person to person trying to find out who has died, but no one can tell him. This dream troubled the devotee who usually remembers no dreams at all. It only made sense when he got a telephone call informing him that Sri Swamiji had left his body.

The next two days, Saturday and Sunday, the 26th and 27th of March, Sri Swamiji’s condition remained reasonably good. On that Saturday night, a devotee in Northern India had a strong intuition that Swamiji had left his body. He dreamed the whole night that Swamiji was being lowered into a pit by two men. That Sunday evening in Seattle, another devotee had to abruptly leave a family dinner because of a sudden, inexplicable emotional disturbance. All the way home the devotee cried and felt deep sorrow for no apparent reason.

Monday, March 28, 1994.

In Bangalore on the morning of March 28, a devotee who lived at the ashram but worked outside was sleeping in the hall by Swamiji’s new rooms. Each evening he would attend to Sri Swamiji personally until about one in the morning. This morning, a few hours before Swamiji left his body in Kakinada, he heard Swamiji calling him by name as usual, the sound coming from the area of Swamiji’s bedroom. He was used to being awakened this way because of the many nights he attended Sri Swamiji and slept on the floor in Swamiji’s room. Swamiji called his name exactly the same way as usual, but the voice was different. He woke up and then realized that Swamiji was away in Kakinada. A week later Swamiji started giving darshan through bhava samadhi on a devotee who had served him for over a decade. It was only then that the man recognized the voice Swamiji had used to call him the day he left his body. It was the voice of the same devotee through whom Sri Swamiji was now speaking in bhava.

Also in Bangalore that same Monday morning, the man who had run the ashram office for many years was in the temple when the naivedyam (food offering) was made to Lord Shiva. He could see tears in the eyes of the figure of Lord Shiva and he also felt like crying. He was worried about Swamiji’s health that morning, and over the next two mornings he continued to see tears on Lord Shiva.

In Kakinada, it was in the very early hours of Monday the 28th of March that Sri Swamiji’s physical condition turned for the worse. He started having distension of the abdomen and griping, severe cramps which felt like the intestines are turning in on themselves. His body was in fairly good condition but for the severe pain.

During the night Sri Swamiji started asking for immediate dialysis, knowing that it would relieve the symptoms from which his body suffered. He was scheduled for dialysis later that morning, but by 3 A.M. he forced those with him to call the nephrologist to arrange for dialysis immediately. The nephrologist refused the request because there was no dialysis technician available at that time in the night. Advised of the doctor’s response, Swamiji insisted that his host go to the doctor and personally insist on immediate dialysis. He and his two cousins went as instructed, but again the doctor refused. Finally, Swamiji made his attending physician telephone the nephrologist. Once again, the doctor refused, saying that Swamiji was already in an emergency situation and he would not undertake the risk of dialysis without a technician. His technician would arrive at 7 A.M. and Swamiji could be dialysed then.

By this time it was about 3:30 A.M. Sri Swamiji had to wait, and he asked for and received an avil injection which helped him get a little nap. From this time on, Swamiji did not want two of his devotees to leave his presence. Swamiji would sleep with his head in one lap, then the other, holding both devotees’ hands. His body became more comfortable.

When Sri Swamiji’s blood pressure was measured at 5:00 A.M., it was a healthy 170 systolic. A half an hour later, it had dropped to 80 systolic, much too low to attempt dialysis. His blood pressure never again got above 80 systolic. His body broke out in cold sweats and from this time until he allowed his body its final rest, Swamiji kept asking for the time of day about every fifteen minutes.

By 6:30 A.M. Sri Swamiji’s heart rate became irregular and his attending physician became very anxious. They moved Sri Swamiji to the hospital where the dialysis clinic was located. There the nephrologist examined him and found him unfit for dialysis because of his body was in a state of shock and its blood pressure too low. Because of the heart irregularity, an eminent cardiologist was called to examine Swamiji. He advised postponing the dialysis for twenty-four hours to wait for Sri Swamiji’s blood pressure to increase.

After the cardiologist reported to Swamiji’s attending physician, she returned to the room where the sadly worn out body of His Holiness was lying. He complained about severe pain low in his back at the base of the spine. The pain was so severe that it made him forget about his stomach pain. From this time on, his body was continually in cold sweats. He told one woman, “Amma. my kundalini is rising.” He described a pain which seemed to slowly move up his body at a rate of about two inches every half hour. The pain made his body writhe and twist.[43]

Sri Swamiji called two devotees and had each hold one of his hands. Then he told one of them “From now onwards, Amma, I don’t need doctors. I can take care of my body myself. I’ll look after everything, I assure you. From now on, leave everything in my hands. I’ll take care of my mission.”

His Holiness continued to bear the severe pain in his body. The doctors gave him injections to help numb his body, then moved him to a room with a cardiac monitor. There they gave Sri Swamiji’s body more injections and capsules to control the heart beat, and the monitor showed the irregularities becoming corrected. Meanwhile, the pain which had localized by Sri Swamiji’s kidneys now started rising further. He described severe chest pain and the cold sweats continued. His body was so restless that the chest leads connected to the cardiac monitor kept falling off. A devotee had to hold his arm to keep the intravenous needle from being pulled out.

He told the doctors that everything was blurry and he could not see. Two eye specialists examined him and confirmed that his body’s low blood pressure was the cause. Then people noticed that Sri Swamiji’s hearing was failing. He could no longer hear when people were responding to his calls. He asked for the plastic surgeon to dress his left foot. The surgeon came and dressed the wound with great devotion, assuring Sri Swamiji that the foot was all right. Swamiji held the hands of his devotees and as difficult as it was for them to see the pain his precious body suffered that morning, the doctors, assistants and devotees whom His Holiness called to be with him the day he put his body down to rest were given a very special blessing.

Sri Swamiji’s body suffered so much because he loved the devotees and he was determined to bring them beyond body consciousness to Self realization. There was no other reason for His Holiness to push his poor body three years beyond its normal endurance. Had the body held up, he would have pushed it even further. No one could be with him without sensing his sweet, caring love and his ultimate indifference to the physical cost to his body. No one who had to witness the anguish of his holy body could resist being deeply affected. Through the physical suffering of beloved spiritual Masters, many devotees’ lives have been transformed throughout the ages. And being profoundly moved was the wonderful blessing His Holiness Sri Sri Sri Shivabalayogi Maharaj gave his devotees.

At about noon or one in the afternoon, Sri Swamiji went into a peaceful sleep for about a half an hour. Throughout this entire time in the hospital, Swamiji had been taking sips of cold water and soft drink. During this short sleep, he could be seen making sucking motions with his closed mouth as if he were drinking. He looked very happy and blissful.

When he awoke, he asked for the chest leads to be attached so he could be connected to the cardiac monitor. He asked for his blood pressure to be measured. He kept talking non-stop, whether giving instructions, conversing, calling out, or asking for the time. His speech was a little slurred so some words could not be understood.

Four devotees arrived to visit and Sri Swamiji told them they should go and have their lunch. One of them, who had taken a vow to take meals in private, remained with Swamiji. He and one other devotee were the only two to witness the miracle of His Holiness entering into yoga nidra.

One of the devotees heard Swamiji saying “Shambhu Shankara Tandri Parameshwara.” [44] Then Sri Swamiji told the devotee, “Look after carefully.” He nodded as though calling the devotee closer and when he drew near, Swamiji said something personal for him. At that time, the devotee noticed a great glow emanating from the body of His Holiness. The light was so bright that he felt that normally he could not have been able to tolerate so much light. He was holding Sri Swamiji’s left hand and thought that it was only because of this physical connection with Swamiji’s hand that he could bear the intensity of such a powerful light. Sri Swamiji smiled at him very pleasantly. The devotee asked Sri Swamiji about the brightness, but the Master only closed his eyes and nodded. Again the devotee asked Sri Swamiji about the light, but the Great Yogi only raised his left hand as if giving a blessing. Then His Holiness closed his eyes again as if to go to sleep. The other devotee saw a brilliant light in between the eyebrows of His Holiness as the beloved Master left his body.

At that moment the cardiac monitor alarm went off. The nephrologist was called and he took immediate action. With four of his staff, he worked hard because the heart beat was very, very irregular. Drugs, direct current shock and cardiac massage were given to no avail. The doctor examined Sri Swamiji’s eyes, saw the pupils dilated, and declared Sri Swamiji dead. It was 1:47 P.M. on Monday, March 28, 1994 and His Holiness had gone into yoga nidra. At the point when the doctor declared him medically dead, Sri Swamiji’s body suddenly relaxed. There was a glow in his body and his mustache stood up as if someone had turned up its hairs.

A death certificate was completed and Sri Swamiji’s body placed into his car and taken to the Adivarapupeta ashram. There the sacred body was seated in a yogic posture in an armchair covered with colorful cloths and facing North. The chair was on a wooden platform under a pandal (shade) in front of the ashram building.

Return to Adivarapupeta

It was mid-afternoon in Bangalore when we received the news. I had returned from Adivarapupeta the evening before and spent one calm night assuring other devotees and talking about future plans. That Monday I was in my ashram room on top of the meditation hall finishing articles for Sri Swamiji’s two magazines, the Inner Eye in India and Currents in the U.S.A. I wrote about Sri Swamiji’s enthusiastic reception in Adivarapupeta, his plans to travel in North India and then to the U.S.A. in early 1995, the plans for celebrating his sixtieth birthday, and his assurances that he would remain with us another forty years.

Around 2:30 I heard loud wailing downstairs. The noise continued and it sounded serious, like someone had been seriously hurt. I ran down the six flights of stairs to the kitchen area where several ashram residents were crying out loud, some of them shrieking in grief. “What’s going on?” I asked the trust secretary, Mr. Ramaradhya.

“Swamiji has died,” he responded, himself in a state of some shock.

I called my wife in Seattle and asked her to inform the devotees in America. She spent the rest of the night calling everyone we knew not only in the U.S. but in England as well. I called a devotee who was with us the night before when we talked about all of Swamiji’s plans. He was unable to respond. I wrote a press release trying to put a positive spin on what had happened, but inside I was empty and I really had no idea what had happened or was to happen.

Plans were made for a few of us to return to Adivarapupeta and bring back Sri Swamiji’s body for burial in the Bangalore ashram. In the middle of the ashram gardens was a recently planted grove of rudraksha trees. They surrounded a mound on which was a statue of Lord Shiva in meditation. Sri Swamiji used to tell a few close devotees that he wanted to be buried in that place. They always begged him to stop talking about such things. Having no other direction, we thought it our duty to comply with Swamiji’s wish even though we knew that his devotees in Adivarapupeta would want his holy body to be buried in that ashram.

We caught the first available flight to Hyderabad, where devotees had made arrangements for two cars to drive all night to reach Adivarapupeta the next morning. We consoled and took care of each other during that long and sorrowful drive, and we shared some wonderful reminiscences about Sri Swamiji in the old days. We were apprehensive about the difficult job of bringing the body back to Bangalore for burial and we struggled to help keep the two drivers awake.

Five Days in Yoga Nidra

While we were traveling from Bangalore to Adivarapupeta, events were unfolding in Adivarapupeta and across India which continued throughout the five days Sri Swamiji’s sacred body gave darshan before taking mahasamadhi. A woman broke a coconut before the holy body and placed the two halves on the ground before him. Blood began to drip from Sri Swamiji’s foot onto one of the coconut halves. This was the first clue for the devotees gathered there that something was unusual.

The Adivarapupeta ashram received a call from Agra. A devotee in bhava samadhi stated that Sri Swamiji was not dead. He had gone into yoga nidra. Only then did a mother come forward whose three year old child went into bhava samadhi at the Kakinada hospital at about the same time as Swamiji’s medical death. The divine spirit in this child also said that “I am not dead. I am in yoga nidra.” The woman had told some people at the hospital, but then kept quiet because nobody took her seriously.

Thereafter, the Adivarapupeta ashram would get periodic reports of other people in bhava samadhi in Agra, Delhi, Hyderabad and London saying to wait, that Sri Swamiji was trying to return to the body but there was an obstacle. Devotees were encouraged to do bhajans twenty-four hours a day to help pull Swamiji back into the body. The Bangalore ashram remained a focal point for collecting and passing on these messages, a handful of devotees staying by the telephone in Swamiji’s room at all times receiving calls with news and calling devotees to keep them advised.

We all wanted to believe Sri Swamiji would miraculously come back to his body, and many of us assumed the messages through bhava meant Swamiji needed our help to do it. Although a yogi needed no help to do anything, we thought that this possible miracle had to do with his body and Sri Swamiji always told us that it was up to the devotees to take care of his body. We knew that his body was badly damaged and had suffered extreme pain, but we also believed that Sri Swamiji wanted to return. None of us wanted to let Swamiji down and many of us were emotionally unready to accept that he had left his body. It was lost on no one to whom I talked in that remote Indian village that all this was taking place over Holy Week, the time Christians prepare for the resurrection of Jesus on Easter Sunday.

Those bhava messages make more sense now. In a broad sense, Sri Swamiji will always return and be with us. Our awareness of his presence depends upon the devotion in our hearts, good bhajans through which Swamiji can continue to bestow blessings and divine bliss through bhava samadhi, his amazing full presence in shakti rupa, and most importantly, good meditation. But over the five days between entering yoga nidra and the mahasamadhi, there was much confusion.

Initial Reactions

When the devotees in Bangalore heard the news that Sri Swamiji had dropped the body, some tried contacting him through disciples who for over a decade had manifested his bhava and in that bhava samadhi had exhibited Swamiji’s full presence. On that first Monday night they informed the devotees in Agra about what had happened and asked whether they could get some answers through Swamiji’s presence in bhava. Only the day before, Sri Swamiji had been fully present upon to tell the Agra devotees that he would live for another forty years and they had nothing to worry about. But they found something which Swamiji said unusual. When they asked Swamiji when he would be coming to Agra, he said, “You are going to call Bangalore tomorrow, aren’t you? Then you will get a definite program.” They drew their own conclusions the next day when they learned the news of Sri Swamiji’s physical passing.

A devotee was in Sri Swamiji’s bhava at the very time Swamiji’s body was pronounced medically dead at 1:47 P.M., and he remained in that bhava until 5 P.M. that afternoon. On Monday night, the Agra devotees tried to get Swamiji to talk, but although Swamiji again came in bhava, he said nothing.

Another devotee through whom Swamiji would often come to give darshan happened to be with the Agra devotees that Monday night. The devotees asked him to contact Swamiji, but even though he received bhava, Sri Swamiji still would not talk. It was as if the usual forms of communication with Swamiji had been cut off.

Swamiji only communicated by making a devotee write down a message in bhava. Swamiji responded to the devotees’ use of the word “mahasamadhi” to describe what had happened to him. Mahasamadhi refers to the yogi’s final liberation from the body. In this written message, Sri Swamiji corrected the devotees by saying “Sri Swamiji has not attained mahasamadhi. Sri Swamiji is only in samadhi.” Swamiji delivered a further written message which was relayed to Bangalore that same Monday night: “Sri Swamiji would wake up at two o’clock, early Tuesday morning. The devotees have to do bhajans, fold their hands to Swamiji at 2 A.M., pray, and ask for Swamiji to wake up and he would.” Bangalore passed on the message to the devotees in Adivarapupeta.

Tuesday, March 29

Sri Swamiji’s instructions from Agra were followed in Adivarapupeta, but Swamiji did not wake up at 2 A.M. as prayed for. The situation was the same.

A little later, but still early Tuesday morning, Sri Swamiji transmitted another written message through bhava. “There is nothing you need to do now. Just go to sleep. At 5 A.M. when you wake up, I will again speak to you.” At 5 A.M., Swamiji gave another written message in Hindi as follows.

Sri Swamiji is in samadhi and if the devotees are willing, they may wait up to 28, 48, 58, 68, 108, 208. 309 or a maximum of 386 hours. The devotees can wait depending upon the condition of the body. If the body starts decomposing, you may say your last prayers. Sri Swamiji shall be with his devotees. Sri Swamiji won’t leave the devotees. Just as Swamiji comes in bhava and gives his instructions and talks to us, he will continue to do so even afterwards. Swamiji’s blessings should be conveyed to all the devotees.

Later that Tuesday morning, those of us from Bangalore who had driven all night arrived at the Adivarapupeta ashram. We had been traveling since Monday afternoon so we had no idea about any messages through bhava samadhi. We expected a mournful sight, but when we drove through the ashram gates we saw a lot of activity, heard joyful bhajans, and realized that many devotees were in bhava samadhi.

Throughout the night we had talked and thought about what it would be like to see Sri Swamiji’s body. We nourished a hope that when we arrived we would find that everything was really all right. It was a shock to see his beautiful but lifeless body. We were forced to confront the reality that the unthinkable had happened. Sri Swamiji had physically left us.

Then we started to hear news that Sri Swamiji had not gone but was in yoga nidra. We had no idea what yoga nidra was, but it sounded a lot better than what we were seeing. Devotees excitedly told us that Swamiji was trying to re-enter his body. We relaxed and our dreaded duty of having to return the body to Bangalore seemed to pass. The mood was one of cautious optimism, but the pit being dug in the ashram building to receive Swamiji’s body was a sober reminder of what had happened.

His Holiness was still taking loving care of each one of us. Those devotees who felt the most grief at losing Sri Swamiji’s physical presence, they went into bhava samadhi almost immediately after seeing his lifeless body, and Sri Swamiji kept them in the bliss of divine bhava throughout most of the next few days.

Tuesday night in Sriharikota, several people who had heard the news about Sri Swamiji gathered sorrowfully. There was weeping and wailing even as they tried to sing bhajans. A devotee through whom Swamiji had regularly come in bhava to give darshan, received bhava and Swamiji asked them, “Why are you crying? Swamiji is not gone.” The devotees asked how could they continue to see Swamiji. He replied, “In meditation.” Within a half an hour, the sadness and tears vanished.

In Adivarapupeta, the bhajans continued all day and night without break.

Wednesday, March 30

Messages encouraged devotees to keep praying for Sri Swamiji’s return, so kirtan, bhajans, meditation and prayer continued throughout India, the United States and England with intense devotion. More devotees arrived in Adivarapupeta from all over India, including Bangalore, Delhi, Hyderabad, Agra, Jhansi, and Dehradun.

The bhajans continued unabated and there were always two devotees continuously fanning Sri Swamiji’s body day and night. Messages through bhava continued to encourage continuous bhajans prayers for Swamiji’s return. We also were encouraged by the miraculous preservation of Sri Swamiji’s holy body. Adivarapupeta in late March is uncomfortably hot and humid. Temperatures in the day climbed above 40 degrees Celsius, over 90 degrees Fahrenheit. Sri Swamiji’s body was protected only by the shade of the pandal, yet it showed no sign whatsoever of rigor mortis which would be expected to set in within hours. There was no discharge from the nostrils or anywhere else. The body was naturally cool to the touch. The eyes, which normally would have to be sewn shut, remained naturally closed. After more than two days, there was no evidence of any decomposition. The sacred body never did show the usual signs of physical death.

Sri Swamiji had told many devotees in India and the United States not to bury a yogi’s body until it started emitting a foul odor. He had told us in the United States that many yogis had been accidentally “killed” because devotees had assumed their bodies were dead. In fact, the yogis were in samadhi and their bodies only appeared to be dead. When the devotees ignorantly buried the body, the yogi was deprived of the opportunity to return physically.

However, after five days of intense heat Sri Swamiji’s body was showing signs of dehydration and the skin on his face was becoming darker. Some devotees were beginning to wonder whether the time had come to perform the mahasamadhi rites and bury Sri Swamiji’s body as befitting a great yogi. As more time passed without Swamiji’s return, the stronger these feelings grew.

Thursday, March 31, 1994 (Good Thursday)

I had telephoned my wife in the United States several times to keep her advised and she called devotees around that country with updates. Thursday morning she telephoned me at the ashram and I gave her a very pessimistic assessment on any revival of Sri Swamiji’s body. I had stayed awake all night to help keep the bhajans going and from about 1 A.M. through about 7 A.M. I had been leading the songs with the help of one group of men, some young people from Delhi, and a sadhu. It felt hopeless and I was hoarse and completely worn out.

While I was on the phone, several devotees I knew arrived from Delhi. It was pure joy to see their familiar faces, good friends with whom I could talk over things because so few people in Adivarapupeta spoke any English. But as I tried to explain to them all that had been going on, all the confusion, fatigue and isolation of the last few days and weeks overwhelmed me and I sobbed like a child. They were also distraught and tired, having traveling by train for three days ever since they got the news about Swamiji on Monday evening. It was very emotional.

I was thinking of sleeping, but realized it was too hot and in that small and then crowded ashram there was no place private enough to sleep anyway. I decided to stay awake and take a cool bath. As I was leaving my bath, I heard a devotee from North Indian singing a bhajan: Parvati priya suta Bheemana thanaya / Shivabalayogi pita Maheshwara / Praneshwara Parameshwara Ardhanareeshwara / Adivarapupeta avatara purusha, roughly meaning “The beautiful son of Parvati and Bheemana / Shivabalayogi is our Father / our very life force, Great Lord Who combines the male and female aspects / the great incarnated soul of Adivarapupeta.” His singing sounded indescribably divine and the sweetness and devotion of his voice were strikingly different from the powerfully fast enthusiasm with which the villagers sang their bhajans. The words and the singing were full of love for Swamiji and immediately revived what had been flagging bhajans. I rushed to sit next to him. Despite my weak and sore voice, I joined in but I no longer had any strength to lead a bhajan.

By Thursday morning, more and more of the devotees gathered in Adivarapupeta felt it was time to begin the mahasamadhi rites. That morning two messages were communicated to Bangalore from two different Jhansi devotees in bhava samadhi. The first message was amazingly timely, as Sri Swamiji was obviously aware of some differences of opinion in Adivarapupeta. “His Holiness is very disappointed with His devotees. They should remain united. His Holiness is very angry with the devotees.” The second message was: “Perform kirtan all night. His Holiness will come back tomorrow.”

Later that day, Bangalore transmitted the news that Sri Swamiji had given additional instructions through bhava. “Immediately you have to call up Adivarapupeta between one and two. First what you have to do is make all people stand in a queue and have darshan. Then Swamiji’s vibhuti has to be given to everybody as they have darshan. All around where Swamiji was made to sit down in samadhi, sprinkle vibhuti with water.” At 1:30 that afternoon, the Bangalore devotees passed on this message to Adivarapupeta and shortly received a return call indicating that Sri Swamiji’s instructions had been carried out.

Thursday afternoon in Adivarapupeta, a meeting was organized for representatives from all over India to decide what to do with Sri Swamiji’s body. I was invited to represent the devotees abroad. For years Swamiji had told devotees that if there was an important decision to be made, they should call an open meeting for all interested devotees and come to a consensus, making accommodations with each other as necessary. If they were unable to reach a decision, then Sri Swamiji himself would provide the direction. Over the years, such meetings were held at Swamiji’s many ashrams in India, and Swamiji often came in bhava samadhi to provide the necessary guidance.

We convened in Swamiji’s bedroom upstairs in the ashram building and voiced opinions on what to do. Some of us believed that Swamiji could still return so the body should not be disturbed. They were concerned about his instructions not to bury a yogi’s body before it emitted a foul odor. Others among us believed the time had come for the mahasamadhi. They pointed out that the change in color of the skin which indicated little hope.

We were still talking when we received two successive phone calls from Hyderabad. One reported that a daughter of a devotee, a girl who was very close to Sri Swamiji, went into bhava and said that the devotees should wait at least until 3 P.M. the next day. Almost immediately after that message was passed on to us in the meeting, the telephone rang again with news that a respected swami also advised to wait until 3:30 P.M. the next day. The explanation given was that this additional twenty-four hour period would be the best remaining opportunity for Sri Swamiji to return to his body. So we decided to wait and reconvene after 3 P.M. the next day.

Later that day, Bangalore received another bhava message. The daughter of a Delhi devotee went into bhava samadhi and some time between 8 and 10 on Thursday evening gave a message substantially as follows: “The reason Swamiji left the body was that the body was proving to be a big obstacle in his mission. He could do much better without the body. But the devotees would have to work harder. They will have to do a lot of meditation and a lot of bhajans. Evil forces are at work and they are strong. Do not underestimate them.”

That evening some of the Northern Indian devotees and I sat on the roof of the ashram building sharing our experiences with Sri Swamiji. Each one of us had wonderful tales and we laughed at stories of how Swamiji would tease and play sweet tricks on us.

The bhajans in Adivarapupeta tirelessly accelerated to an unbelievably intense pitch. Adivarapupeta is a small village and a few devotees make up its wonderful bhajan group. Although many devotees had gathered and joined in the bhajans, it is still amazing to me how that small and talented bhajan group’s devotion and enthusiasm carried them through what turned out to be over a hundred and twenty hours of continuous bhajans. The bhajans throughout Thursday night and Friday morning were exceptionally moving. By then I was too exhausted and hoarse and had to sleep, but I would often wake up through the night to hear the powerful rhythms and melodies of the bhajans. Many people meditated or danced ecstatically in bhava. The messages to wait another day to give Sri Swamiji a chance were having an obvious impact.

Over those same five days, hundreds and thousands of people came to see Sri Swamiji’s holy body, and many of them camped down to stay in the small ashram. All these people were fed three meals every day plus tea morning, afternoon and night. Quietly and efficiently, that small ashram in that small village generously acquired and prepared enough food to feed everyone. That so many people could be fed so many meals over so many days by the dedicated service of a handful of people was a miracle. No one was hungry, and Swamiji must have been very pleased.

Friday, April 1, 1994 (Good Friday)

The five days between Swamiji entering yoga nidra on Monday and the mahasamadhi ceremonies on Good Saturday were often very confusing and difficult, and the three weeks before that were also extremely draining for me emotionally. There were times when I felt totally hopeless and disillusioned. “It was all over,” I thought to myself. “I’ll just go back to my life and forget Shivabalayogi ever really happened.” All the things he promised could no longer happen. He was gone and maybe he never was real. Most of us experienced deep shock and grief, and I know some like me also felt let down. It seemed to happen so suddenly and without warning or any instructions. Only three days before he left in yoga nidra, Swamiji assured us that he would stay with us and get better.

Friday morning I made a mental promise to continue with all the work I had planned to do for Swamiji. I was done with the worst of my grief and I decided to complete the book of experiences I had started, help put together a book of Sri Swamiji’s photographs, and work to make films and video tapes of Swamiji available.

Sri Swamiji would not let any of us remain long with our sorrow. Friday morning witnessed a miracle of his continued grace. The sadness among the many devotees gathered before Sri Swamiji’s body became transformed to happiness and hope. The previous day, a young girl of about thirteen from a nearby town had been weeping continuously before the holy body. Friday morning, Swamiji put her in bhava samadhi and through her changed the dominant mood at the Adivarapupeta ashram.

She had Shivabalayogi’s bhava although she did not assume the same hand posture like Swamiji, an easily recognizable characteristic of his bhava. She sat on the ground facing Swamiji’s holy body and swayed rhythmically and very beautifully to the bhajans, her eyes open and often smiling very sweetly. After some hours, the divine spirit in her called devotees to give them gave darshan and vibhuti. Some devotees helped call me over and I was greeted with a very wonderful smile of recognition and assurance. That smile was my confirmation that what I had just been thinking was right. I would continue with what I had started. I knew that Swamiji’s bhava was upon the girl and through her, Swamiji put vibhuti between devotees’ eyebrows and assured us all. More and more devotees came for such darshan and walked away with spirits lifted. People began to smile and some burst into tears from relief.

There were several others present who went into deep bhava samadhi. One man was in a very deep bhava of Nagendra, the cobra who adorns Shiva, and with his snake-like motions clearly indicated he was not only worshipping the subtle body in the girl, but also protecting it. All the bhava of the other people in bhava were expressed with reference to this girl’s bhava. That is, the spirit in her was controlling the others. Some in bhava clearly were worshipping the astral presence in the girl. It was beautiful to experience, especially for those who grieved deeply and were greatly confused by Sri Swamiji’s abrupt physical death.

The girl’s trance helped produce an optimism and joy which had been missing for many and the mood became more positive. She helped us pray and sing as hard as we could as the three o’clock time approached. She stood up and gave instructions for the conch to be blown continuously. The bhajans became very intense and were sustained at a very fast pace for a long time. People almost frantically were praying or chanting Om namah Shivaya or Om with every effort to call Sri Swamiji back. The bhajan group kept singing Om namah Shivaya continuously, periodically cutting the tempo only to build up the pace again quickly. People were whispering in Sri Swamiji’s ear. People were chanting mantras. People were praying in every way they could think of.

By 3 P.M., it became more and more apparent that the possible return of Sri Swamiji that afternoon would not happen. There was no hoped for miracle, but an unexpected and miraculous transformation did occur. Through Sri Swamiji’s definite presence and divine grace, the devotees had expressed their love and were given an opportunity to express all they should for their beloved Swamiji.

The bhajans continued, and at about 4:00 P.M. we reconvened in Sri Swamiji’s room, as we had the day before. We could see that the skin color on Sri Swamiji’s head had become dark, that his body was dehydrating so that the nose had become quite sharp and beak like (which reminded some of how Suka Rishi, an earlier incarnation of Shivabalayogi, was to have looked), and that the skin on the cheeks was sagging. There was no evidence of the hoped for return of life. The mahasamadhi was scheduled for the next day, Saturday.

The bhajans continued Friday, day and night, without any break. Friday evening, a mini-bus full of devotees arrived from Bangalore. During their drive to Adivarapupeta, one of the devotees went into the bhava of Sri Swamiji. When they asked Swamiji whether he would return to his body, he did not reply, a response these devotees understood to mean he would not.

Saturday, April 2, 1994, Mahasamadhi

His Holiness, Sri Sri Sri Shivabalayogi Maharaj, entered mahasamadhi in Adivarapupeta on Saturday the 2nd of April, 1994.

Sri Swamiji later explained through bhava that he entered mahasamadhi at 3.00 P.M. For the previous five days he had remained in yoga nidra. After the devotees’ decision on Friday afternoon to proceed with the mahasamadhi rites, Sri Swamiji gave a message through bhava to wait on the interment until 3.00 P.M. the following day. It was exactly at this time that the devotees lowered his holy body into the Samadhi pit. For this reason, April 2 is the date on which we celebrate the mahasamadhi of His Holiness.

At about 5:00 A.M. that Saturday morning, several people witnessed a divine light falling from a star in the sky. The light fell to the ground in front of the Dhyana Mandir, then entered the temple and went into the Ardhanareeshwara Lingam which Sri Swamiji had installed the year after he completed twelve years of tapas. There was light drizzle that morning in Adivarapupeta, something quite unusual from the heavy dew which was typical for that time of year. Rain is auspicious because it often attends the presence of a great yogi and Sri Swamiji was well known to bring rain with him wherever he traveled.

Throughout that morning, devotees did puja to Sri Swamiji, each praying to the beloved Swamiji in his or her own personal manner. Dear friends from Delhi had helped me get some flowers, camphor, incense and a coconut as an offering. As I offered them to his sacred body, I felt the presence of all the devotees around the world who could not be with us in Adivarapupeta, and I silently asked Sri Swamiji to accept the small offering in all our names.

The more formal puja and ceremonies began at about noon. The girl who had been in Swamiji’s bhava directing the mood and activities the previous day was again in the same entrancing bhava throughout this day. The spirit in her guided the ceremonies with very few words, using mostly gestures. She made sure that everything was done as befitting the unique greatness of the divine soul whom the ancient Kumar Nadi describes as the Universal Guru, the Guru to yogis, spiritual leaders, sadhus, kings, priests, the underprivileged, and the outcasts.

A beautiful mahasamadhi ceremony was performed as due the Lord of Yogis. His precious body still showed none of the usual effects of death. It remained supple, intact, and unspoiled. The holy body was washed with hundreds of pots full of milk, fruit, curds, coconut water, perfumes and water. This abhishekam ceremony ended around 2:30 in the afternoon when devotees reverently prepared the sacred body for the mahasamadhi. A large cloth furnished privacy as Sri Swamiji’s body was dressed in a fresh robe. When this cloth was removed, a little of his chest and stomach was exposed and, unlike the face and head which had become quite dark, I saw that his body appeared very natural and life-like.

Amidst enthusiastic pushing and jostling by the large crowd, the holy body was carried into the darshan room on the ground floor of the ashram building. It was in this small room where Sri Swamiji used to sit and give darshan on a low, tiger skin covered asana. Over the decades, doors on the East and West sides of this room allowed tens of thousands of devotees to file by His Holiness for darshan and pranam to his holy presence. This will continue for centuries and millennia as this same room is now the site of the Samadhi where people can still come and receive Sri Swamiji’s powerful darshan.

A pit had been dug and carefully lined in the floor where Sri Swamiji’s asana had been kept. Sri Swamiji’s body was seated in a yogic position on a bed of salt, then vibhuti and rice. His body was smeared with vibhuti, then adorned with flowers, costly perfumes and fragrant oils, turmeric, kumkum powder and sandalwood paste. Many large lingams made of vibhuti were placed with him. Each devotee was given an opportunity to make a final offering before the sacred body was buried in the unhusked rice (“paddy rice”) which had just been harvested from the rice paddies which surround the ashram and the village.

As I offered some small flowers, I again thought of all the devotees in the United States and throughout the world who could not be at this special occasion to say good-bye to Swamiji’s holy body. Swamiji wanted to be with us all before he left his body, but that was not possible physically. But, as we continue to find out as we talk to devotees, Swamiji touched each devotee in a special way to let them know he was still with us. By the time a layer of earth was put over the Samadhi, it was after five o’clock in the afternoon.

Sri Swamiji’s body faces North, the same direction in which His Holiness had previously faced when giving darshan in that small room in the Adivarapupeta ashram building. Meditation to the North, although not as beneficial as the East, has few obstacles. By facing North, he is looking away from his native village and his back is to the adjacent Dhyana Mandir where he completed tapas. It is as if Sri Swamiji is looking forward and not to the past.

That evening, in the clouds which formed to the North of Adivarapupeta, the same direction which Sri Swamiji is facing, brilliant flashes of lightning continued into the night.

Sunday, April 10, 1994, Consecration of the Samadhi in Bangalore

In Bangalore, it rained quite heavily on the day of Sri Swamiji’s mahasamadhi in Adivarapupeta. Like Adivarapupeta, this rain was unusual for Bangalore at that time of year. On that same afternoon, Saturday the 2nd of April, the sky in Bangalore was covered with clouds. Four children, the eldest a teenager, were visiting the ashram and at about 3-3:30 P.M. they were standing near the garden water tap by the side driveway next to the meditation hall. They saw a beam of light descend all around the ashram, then focus in the middle of the garden amid the grove of rudraksha trees. The light seemed like a powerful sunbeam coming from the East, but in the mid-afternoon on a completely overcast day that was impossible. The light came from a point on top of Sri Swamiji’s rooms above the meditation hall.

A second Samadhi for Sri Swamiji was prepared at the Bangalore ashram according to the detailed instructions which Sri Swamiji had given through bhava samadhi over the previous few days. While he was still in his body, Swamiji used to remark that he would like to be buried among a grove of rudraksha trees in the middle of the ashram garden. Now that he had dropped his physical body, it was time to implement his wish. The location and dimensions of the Samadhi, the polished granite slabs with which it is to be covered, the construction of a mandapam over the Samadhi, the source and dimensions for the Shivalingam to be installed, and all other details were specified by Sri Swamiji through bhava.

Sri Swamiji told many devotees that his jata, the matted hair which grew past his waist during twelve years of tapas, was as sacred and powerful as his body. His long jata, already almost falling off, was cut off during kaya kalpa in 1982 and had been carefully preserved in Adivarapupeta. The jata was brought to Bangalore according to Sri Swamiji’s instructions through bhava. It was carefully placed in Swamiji’s car and driven from Adivarapupeta, stopping overnight at Swamiji’s ashram in Anantapur for rest.

Upon arrival in Bangalore on Tuesday the 5th of April, 1994, the holy jata was taken to Sri Swamiji’s mother’s mahasamadhi at the old Bangalore ashram. A large group of us waited there to receive his holy presence. After darshan of his mother, as Sri Swamiji always does before and after an absence from Bangalore, the jata was taken to the nearby main ashram. On the main street corner an even larger crowd of devotees met Swamiji’s car and walked in procession before it singing, shouting and chanting his praises. The procession entered the ashram gates where Swamiji’s car pulled up at the bottom of the steps leading to the meditation hall, just as it always did when bringing its precious passenger. The sacred jata was reverently carried up the stairs to Swamiji’ s rooms above the hall. Later this spiritually powerful form of His Holiness was placed on Sri Swamiji’s asana in the meditation hall so all the people could receive his darshan and blessings. Sri Swamiji remains there in this special form to this day.

The Bangalore mahasamadhi celebration began at noon on Sunday, the 10th of April. The Samadhi pit had been dug in the middle of the garden, as he wished, and carefully lined with stone. After a homa and purnahuti (offerings), a small portion of his jata, the cloth he was wearing in Adivarapupeta just before his mahasamadhi there, a Shivalingam made from the earth in which his holy body was buried, and some personal effects were laid on a bed of vibhuti. Many people in that crowd of devotees were in bhava samadhi on this special occasion and many devotees had powerful experiences of Sri Swamiji’s presence. After we made offerings of flowers, tulsi leaves, incense, camphor, turmeric, kumkum, perfume and money, the Samadhi was covered with earth.

That same night, heavy rain again fell on Bangalore, an auspicious reminder of the presence of a great yogi.

I AM WITH YOU ALWAYS

Death has no meaning to a true yogi. The yogi may drop the physical form in a process called mahasamadhi, but the yogi’s presence, blessings, miracles, and guidance will continue until the Divine mission entrusted to the yogi is completed. Within the first few weeks after Sri Shivabalayogi Maharaj left his body, hundreds of people in India, England, the United States and other countries on countless occasions have seen, physically felt, and conversed with his physical form or his astral body of white light, whether in normal consciousness, meditation, dreams or the divinely blissful spiritual rapture of bhava samadhi. Within a month, Sri Swamiji was touring his ashrams in India and within seven months, devotees in England and the United States also were witnessing and experiencing the full power of Sri Swamiji’s presence through bhava. Nothing has changed except the physical form through which Sri Shivabalayogi is working.

Since completing twelve years of tapas on August 7, 1961, Sri Swamiji has been giving the world practical demonstrations of tapas shakti, the powers attained through tapas. His first public message was that through tapas shakti a person could even travel to the sun. Swamiji would perform all kinds of miracles to astonish people and make them stop and consider their own potential in light of what Swamiji accomplished. Sri Swamiji’s mission is to use his tapas shakti to give people tangible experiences of the Divine, to teach them how to reach God, to take care of the needs of their daily lives, and to protect the world from the ignorance which would destroy it.

Over three decades of public service in his body, Sri Shivabalayogi used many different ways of blessing, communicating and being with his devotees. He continues to use all of them. Those who were blessed with visions of Swamiji in meditation or dreams continue to have these experiences. Some devotees would hear Swamiji’s voice giving instructions or assurances in meditation or even during ordinary consciousness. These continue and devotees consistently report a heightened sense of Sri Swamiji’s presence and a greater depth to their meditation.

Since the mahasamadhi, many devotees have seen Shivabalayogi on numerous occasions, often in Adivarapupeta, the resting place for his holy body, and in Bangalore, the site of his international center. Some have seen his physical form while in bhava samadhi, others while in ordinary consciousness. Many devotees regularly see Swamiji’s face above the lamp that is kept lit before Swamiji’s dais in the Bangalore meditation hall. In the United States and England, devotees have seen his physical and light body forms during meditation and bhajan programs or even normal activities, in either case with eyes open while normally conscious.

Three months after the mahasamadhi, people in Adivarapupeta continue to see Swamiji in the form of light. This light travels from the entrance of the ashram towards the place where Swamiji sat for tapas the first time on August 7, 1949. At least four or five people have seen this light, usually after ten o’clock in the night. One person described this light as in the shape of a candle flame, passing across the houses very fast towards the place where Swamiji was made to sit in tapas. One boy who was sleeping outside his house was awakened by Swamiji who was holding the trishula (trident). Swamiji asked the boy, “Why are you sleeping outside across my way?” The boy got up and told Swamiji, “No Swamiji. I will sleep inside” and went inside. Another man described the light as the shape of a marigold flower. One woman has seen Swamiji standing near a jackfruit tree while she was going back home after bhajans.

For the construction of the new temple in Adivarapupeta, Swamiji regularly comes in bhava samadhi to give detailed instructions. Swamiji always gave meticulous and often technical directions for the construction of buildings at his ashrams, and since his mahasamadhi he has taken a very special interest in the new temple which replaces the Dhyana Mandir. Devotees feel as if he has never left them. They have his darshan so often through bhava that they do not have time to miss his physical body.

Sri Swamiji continues to come to his devotees to give darshan, love, guidance and blessings. He wants his devotees to share these experiences with each other so we all come to know that he is always with us in a very real and practical sense. The following is a small sample of devotees’ experiences since Swamiji left his body.

—  —

After meditation, I usually lie down and rest for a half an hour or so. I am not sleeping. It’s more like a slumber. The day before Swamiji left his body I was feeling very disturbed about some personal matters. I lay down for a rest and Swamiji appeared to me in my slumber. He said, “Why are you disturbed? Leave your concerns at my feet.”

Over the next week and more, I would see or experience Swamiji every day. He was with me in dreams. He would tell me things. Sometimes I could tell there was feasting going on, a celebration with people eating.

It was over this same period that the Delhi devotees got the news that Swamiji had left his body. My husband and I with other long time devotees spent three days traveling by train to Adivarapupeta to attend Swamiji’s mahasamadhi. My daily experiences with Swamiji continued throughout that time and after I returned home.

—  —

It was a week before Swamiji left his body. I came home from Sunday evening meditation, unloaded the car, and replaced on our home altar the picture of Swamiji which we use during our weekly meditations. I was doing an arthi to his astral presence in the house when suddenly I was hit with extreme pain in my abdomen. I doubled over and went to lie down. My stomach was bloated, moving and contorting of its own accord. I felt gas in my intestines and the pain got worse.

I crawled back to our altar to get some vibhuti which Swamiji had given me for my stomach when I was in India. I had not eaten anything and somehow I “knew” that this pain was not physically related. The only thing that could help me was the vibhuti. I ate some and rubbed some on my stomach according to the directions he had given me. Immediately I felt relief and most of my pain and discomfort was gone.

The rest of the week I could not eat much without being assailed by gas attacks. I had never experienced anything like this before. I decided not to go to doctors because I knew they would have nothing to say. I kept eating the vibhuti and rubbing it on my stomach throughout that week. There was one night, Tuesday or Wednesday, when I was unable to sleep at all.

That Saturday morning I decided to telephone Swamiji and the devotees at his Bangalore ashram gave me the telephone number of the house in Kakinada where he was staying. I called to ask for his blessings for my father who had just been diagnosed with cancer. I felt bad about troubling Swamiji, but his doctor, Devi, assured me it was all right, then returned with Swamiji’s assurances that my father would be well. (My father did recover fully.) Then Devi told me the harrowing story of how they had almost lost Swamiji on the previous Tuesday and Wednesday night.

I asked Devi to tell Swamiji to please not be ill any more, that we all loved him so much, and that we wanted him to be well. Devi translated Swamiji’s response: “He asks me to tell you that ‘Swamiji gives his blessings to all devotees.’ ” Normally when Swamiji asked me to covey blessings it would be for the American devotees or the devotees in Seattle. This time he said all devotees.

Early that Monday morning, at 1:30 in the night, I was awakened by my husband’s telephone call to tell me that Swamiji had left his body. Once I began to recover from the shock, I began the slow process of telephoning devotees all over the country. Although it was the middle of the night, I wanted everyone to know immediately. I made about fifty calls that night and so many devotees had the same general experience to relate to me. Nearly everyone had felt Swamiji’s presence especially strongly over the prior two weeks. We all realized that we had been praying fervently for Swamiji’s health and feeling his presence much more closely.

As I was making those calls, I realized that my stomach and intestinal problem had vanished and it has not returned since. It was afterwards that I learned about Swamiji’s chronic suffering from the severe pain from gas trapped in his convoluted intestines. Swamiji used to say that close devotees would feel his own physical problems. I also learned about something which Sri Swamiji had said that January during an interview for Sri Swamiji’s Indian journal, The Inner Eye. Swamiji said that his devotees come to him about ten days before they die. It occurred to me that before Swamiji left his body, he came to each devotee to assure them and make them feel his presence very closely.

—  —

On the morning of Good Friday (April 1, 1994), I dreamed I was having Swamiji’s darshan. I had no questions for him. I was just glad to be in his presence. As I was sitting and gazing at him, he disappeared. I knew he was still there. I could still feel his loving energy. I waited for him to reappear in the form I was used to seeing him, but he didn’t. Then I felt a light tap on the crown of my head and I heard a voice say, “Good bye.” I turned to look over my right shoulder and saw him walking away. I woke up knowing that he was leaving the physical plane and that it was not really a “good bye.”

—  —

The time Swamiji left his body was a little after one in the morning Seattle time. At that time, I awoke from a disturbing dream in which I felt utterly abandoned, like a child left in the middle of a vast nowhere. After I awoke, I saw Swamiji’s physical form. He told me to always remember to love and forgive. I saw his body ascend and move through several realms of existence. Then I saw something like a transparency of him superimposed upon a large, twelve foot high gold statue like a Buddha in a meditation posture. Swamiji was alive and moving in that statue. Afterwards, I went back to sleep.

Since Swamiji left his body, I feel his presence to be much more powerful. His presence was especially strong the week or so after he left the body, and his spiritual power continues to be with me as I practice massage and healing energy work with my clients.

—  —

My maid has served the family for many years and is a devotee of Swamiji. She used to get into long conversations with Swamiji and he would give her many blessings. She was traveling in a bus at the time Swamiji left his body. This was at 1:47 p.m. on Monday, March 28. It was at that time that she smelled incense. It struck her as strange and she asked several people on the bus whether they knew of any incense. She could not find the source of that fragrance.

When devotees in Delhi heard the news that Swamiji had left his body, several of my family members, some other devotees, and I immediately left for Adivarapupeta. I hurriedly left instructions for my maid to keep a lamp burning before the photograph of Swamiji in my puja area. I had to run to catch the train and a few days later I was there for the mahasamadhi ceremony. I checked my watch at the time and I remember that it was 5 p.m. on Good Saturday, April 2, when Swamiji’s head was being covered in the samadhi at Adivarapupeta.

My maid did morning and evening puja while I was gone. On that Saturday, she decided to do ritual washing (abhishekam) of the deities. She carefully cleared the marble surface and bathed the gods. She had left the room to get more water when she heard a crash. When she returned, she saw that Swamiji’s photograph had slipped and fallen. The glass in its frame was broken all over the table and floor. This happened at 5 p.m.

She cleared up the glass and somewhat nervously put the photograph in one of my drawers. She continued to wash the deities. On the altar there is a small Shivalingam with a cobra made of metal in a protective position over it. When the maid reached in this area, the fangs of the cobra dug into her hand, drawing blood. The wound took several days to heal.

When I returned from Adivarapupeta I noticed that my photograph of Swamiji was missing. My maid produced it from the drawer and related what had happened. We realized that the photo had fallen and its glass broken at the very same time Swamiji’s head was being covered in the Samadhi.

—  —

The afternoon and evening of March 28, the day Swamiji left his body, I learned that Swamiji had given instructions in Adivarapupeta that all devotees should sit before a burning lamp and meditate all night. That night I sat in meditation for six hours, from two to eight o’clock in the morning. I usually see Swamiji in my meditation, but this time I had no vision or image of him. I personally felt that this message of meditation had to do with the continuity of my dhyana

I still had the feeling of Swamiji inside, as well as the impulse to keep meditating, so I continued my meditation. After a while I saw the image of Swamiji, but it was very faint. Swamiji was extremely weak and had wrinkles on his forehead, a furrowed brow as if from worry. I felt that Swamiji was gone and no longer visible to me. After a while, I felt there was some kind of process going on inside me and that I had been given a special eye, a third eye, to see it. Again I saw that Swamiji was very weak and was making efforts to come back inside. I felt that Swamiji was urging me to help in this process.

Suddenly I felt this process was complete and I found a meaning in that process. The message was only meditation. I felt that my continuity with Swamiji was established again. There is no discontinuity in my meditation experiences simply because of Swamiji’s physical disappearance from this world.

After meditation, I went to the bathroom and closed my eyes for a while. I saw Swamiji’s figure on the floor, something which I often had seen before. Swamiji was upside down, some water coming out of his mouth. A small figure, very tiny, made of copper wire came out of Swamiji’s mouth. Then I saw a young lady in a green saree appear near Swamiji, extending her two hands towards him. Then the tiny figure jumped into her hands. From this I concluded that Swamiji was not returning to his body.

I traveled to Adivarapupeta as soon as I could after Swamiji left his body. There I had darshan of Swamiji’s body before the mahasamadhi ceremonies and while I was meditating I saw a great light.

I returned to Bangalore after the mahasamadhi. I was lying on my bed at the ashram when I lost sight of the room’s ceiling and instead saw Swamiji in padmasana (lotus posture) coming forward to me. I was not meditating and it was not a dream. This vision continued for about ten minutes. I awoke another devotee who was sleeping in the same room, but she could not see anything.

Then on the night of April 9, I was awake and saw Swamiji in the ashram garden. The garden looked like it used to be about five years ago, much more vacant with few plantings. I saw many people with Swamiji, some doing bhajans. I thought they needed water, so I brought some in a pot and left it there.

—  —

We arrived in Adivarapupeta Wednesday morning to have darshan of Swamiji’s body. I was sad, and tears started flowing. Then when I closed my eyes, I saw a very bright sunlight in the sky with a tail, like a corona, trying to come, but it was stopping. This was not the sun but another light source in the sky. The light was trying to enter Swamiji’s body. Each time I closed my eyes I saw this light.

I also saw a white light coming from the Shivalingam in the Dhyana Mandir. It was coming onto Swamiji’s body where it was sitting. Whenever I would look at the Shivalingam, I would see this light. I thought maybe I was imagining it. But each time I closed my eyes I would see the same beautiful light. I would also see a beautiful white, diamond studded like light coming from the Lingam towards Swamiji, but it was stopping before it got to his body.

The next day I went into the Dhyana Mandir and saw a huge light about the Lingam. It was in three stripes, each about six inches wide, with a blue circle of light. The vision created a great impression on me and I can see it very clearly as I am describing it now, several weeks later. It is a beautiful, beautiful blue circle of light which I am unable to forget. Whenever I think about the vision, I feel it. The vision gives me an assurance that everything is fine.

—  —

I have known and served Sri Swamiji since the first time I met him in 1964. Usually in the evenings at the Bangalore ashram, I help take care of Swamiji’s asana, do arthi, and otherwise help in the work of the ashram.

On Thursday night, March 24, I dreamed that Swamiji was being offered arthi and he was giving darshan. The next morning when I told my sister, I found out that she had the same dream. On the 30th and 31st, I was in the temple at the Bangalore ashram doing the evening kumkum puja when flowers fell from the idols, an auspicious indication that a wish has been granted. But the next night, Friday, no flower fell and the temple curtain accidentally caught fire.

I was chanting Om namah Shivaya throughout Friday night into Saturday morning, but by about 4:30-5:00 A.M. I got the impression that Swamiji was absorbed by Shiva and Parvati. Four days later, Swamiji came in bhava upon one of the other women who lives at the ashram. Through that bhava samadhi, Swamiji asked, “Where is my beard now?” I got the answer in my mind that Swamiji’s beard was with Shiva and Parvati. Surprisingly, another devotee spoke out the same answer, to which Swamiji agreed.

After the Bangalore devotees heard the news of Swamiji leaving his body, I traveled to Adivarapupeta and was there before the mahasamadhi. I sat in meditation before Swamiji’s holy body. In my meditation, Swamiji came and hugged me with both arms and blessed me. Swamiji told me, “Don’t be afraid. I am here always.”

All of the Thursday night before the Bangalore Samadhi was consecrated, I could not sleep. I could feel Swamiji touch me. I could feel his hands and the rest of his body, but I could not see his face. Swamiji kept telling me, “Come, let us go to Jagadish and Yashoda,” but I could not get up. On the day of the Samadhi in Bangalore, and before the relics were placed in the Samadhi, Swamiji told me that his right thumb was in the rudraksha tree towards the South-southwest, and his feet were in the rudraksha trees towards the West.

During that day, I kept worrying about milk which had to be boiled for Swamiji, a job which I would often do when Swamiji was in his body. At first I thought not to bother, but then I got concerned that Swamiji would want it. So I and some other ashram women put some milk on a low flame. Later I felt that Swamiji really did ask for milk. By this time, the mahasamadhi activities were completed except for the simple chanting of mantras at the samadhi. I brought the milk and put it on the North side of the samadhi. Then I heard Swamiji say that he couldn’t reach it and he wanted it put on the South side. I thought maybe it was just my own thoughts, but I could not help it. I was in bhava samadhi. I got up and moved the milk to the South side.

The day after Swamiji’s Samadhi was consecrated in Bangalore, it was about eleven o’clock in the morning and I was sleeping. I had been up very late because of the ashram functions, but there was a puja going on at the ashram that morning. Swamiji came to me, picked up my arm, and woke me up. He said, “Why are you sleeping? Are you disgusted with me?” Although I was awake, I was still very sleepy and soon fell back into a slumber. Again Swamiji came to me and woke me up by shaking my arm. This time Swamiji told me, “I’ll follow you always. Don’t be afraid of anything. Don’t feel my absence.”

Then Swamiji asked me for an anklet for his right leg. I was still in bhava and wondered how I could get it to him. But somehow I removed my anklet and gave it to another devotee to be put in the samadhi. I asked Swamiji, “What do you want the anklet for?” He answered, “I would like to wear it just like child Krishna playing the flute.”

When I was chanting the Mrittunjaya Mantra that evening by the Samadhi, I closed my eyes and saw Swamiji wearing Shiva’s crown. Another time I saw Swamiji with the crescent moon on his forehead, just like Shiva. Yet another time, I saw him wearing all the jewelry that devotees had given to him as presents over the years.

—  —

The photograph of Sri Swamiji’s light body (jyoti swarupa) taken the day before his body was interred in the Samadhi at the Adivarapupeta ashram.

I had been taking all sorts of photographs and video tape of Sri Swamiji for two months: Swamiji giving darshan, Swamiji bathing in the ocean and the Godavari River, Swamiji returning to Adivarapupeta, Swamiji dedicating the foundation of the new weavers’ society building, and many more scenes. The plan was to collect as much material as possible to edit into video tapes and books for distribution to devotees. But when we got the news that Swamiji had left his body, I left all my fancy equipment behind in Bangalore. We were in a hurry to return to Adivarapupeta and there was too much sadness. I did, however, take my pocket camera.

I could not bring myself to take any pictures and I wanted nothing to remind me of such sadness. What was going on seemed so unreal, so devastating, so confusing. It seemed to come without any warning because Swamiji kept assuring us he would remain with us another forty years. Yet here was his lifeless body. If he would come back to life like the bhava messages said, I thought to myself, then I would have something to take pictures about.

As the days and nights wore on without any sign of Swamiji’s return, I began to doubt him. I felt let down. I even thought Swamiji had cheated us by dying. Then on the Friday morning after he left his body, Good Friday, Sri Swamiji came in bhava upon the young girl who swayed so rhythmically and beautifully to the beat of the bhajans.

Through his presence and assurance through that girl, many devotees forgot their sadness and my recommitment was affirmed. Swamiji through that girl called many devotees forward for blessings and to give them vibhuti. Swamiji called me back a second time and gestured with a hand cupped in a circle up to the eye. “He wants you to take photographs,” explained the devotee attending Swamiji and the girl. “Photos of what?” I asked. “Of everything you see here,” came the translated answer.

I got my pocket camera and started taking pictures of the crowd and bhajan group before Sri Swamiji’s holy body, then at Swamiji’s insistence, of the young girl in his wonderful bhava samadhi. I took pictures of devotees receiving his blessings and vibhuti on their foreheads. Then as the excitement and intensity of the bhajans and the devotees’ prayers were building towards the expected return of Sri Swamiji by three that afternoon, I took what was intended to be a formal photo of Sri Swamiji’s body as it had been giving darshan for the previous four days: Sri Swamiji’s holy body being fanned by two devotees on either side of him.

About a week later in Bangalore, I picked up the developed photos and was flipping through them quickly as I walked back to the ashram. I was puzzled by a white cloud looking area on one of the photos. It wasn’t the print because it appeared on the negative. I could not think of any explanation. No one was burning camphor at the time I took the picture, no one else was taking pictures with a flash, and the white area on the photo was too symetrical and vertical, obscuring Swamiji’s body almost perfectly with a dense, cloud-like column of white light and leaving the devotees on either side visible.

The next night, Sri Swamiji was in bhava upon Miss Yashoda and I asked him what was in the photo. He just smiled. Not satisfied, a couple of nights later I again asked Sri Swamiji who again was in bhava upon Miss Yashoda. “There is a white area on the photograph I took of Swamiji’s body just before the mahasamadhi. Would Swamiji tell us just exactly what is the white area in this photo?”

“Jyoti swarupa,” was his response. “It is Swamiji’s light form. He wanted to show it to us. In his light form, everyone of us is going to experience Swamiji in this form. He’ll come and touch us, touch our body, touch our mind. You will actually feel Swamiji. I’ll shake you up. I will touch you. I will call you. Those people who keep me in their mind, I’ll be with them always.”

—  —

On Good Friday evening, our shepherd-mix dog got into the altar room of our house. I observed the dog, without his being aware, having a nice “visit” with someone of about Swamiji’s height. The dog’s eyes were moving around the room, then he looked up as he does when someone is about to pat him on the head. I entered the room and startled the dog. I said, “What is it?” The dog looked at Swamiji’s photo on the altar and nodded as if to say, “Him, of course.”

Both my husband and I were very grief stricken about Swamiji’s departure. We were listless and sad. To make matters worse, I became very ill. Easter Sunday night I consoled myself by reading from Swamiji’s book, Tapas Shakti. I read his advice to pray before Swamiji’s picture. Although I did this often, I was struck by the advice and went to our altar. I applied vibhuti and then poured out my grief to him. I asked for his reassurance. I was already quite tired so when I lay down to meditate, I drifted into sleep within a few minutes.

I cannot say that my meditation was “good” or that I was dreaming in the normal sense. Nor was I in any “trance” that I know of. I would just sleep a little, then awake with impressions, then return to sleep. My first impression was of an immense outpouring of love which replaced my despair with happiness and took away much of my bodily suffering. Swamiji seemed to want me to know that despite everything, he was very happy and wanted us to be happy. Everything was all right. I sensed a beaming smile and much radiance all around him.

I went back to sleep and awoke with more impressions, like a dream which I could not remember. It was Swamiji in a spirit form hovering over his body and trying to re-enter. He tried very hard and many times, but the body was too damaged to contain his spirit any longer. But Swamiji wanted to please his devotees and disciples, those who had prayed for his recovery, bought medical supplies, and served him in so many ways. He wanted to stay a little longer in his physical form for their sake.

Again I fell asleep and awoke. Swamiji knew that the devotees were grieving but their grief would be short. They should bathe themselves in Swamiji’s loving radiance, be happy, and quickly get started to continue Swamiji’s work. This was very important. There was some question why Swamiji left his body during Easter week. Swamiji explained that he had not planned it that way, but it was nevertheless meaningful and would serve to clear doubts in some people’s minds.

I felt that Swamiji had told me that his Samadhi shrine would become comparable in some ways to that of the great Muslim Sufi saint, Kwaja Moinuddin Chishti, in Ajmer where thousands visit and are served in mass feedings from huge cooking pots. But in his case, Swamiji explained, people of all faiths would come, including Muslims, and many miracles would happen. Swamiji seemed to emphasize his compassion for the Muslim community and wanted it known that Muslims are welcome. Many would make the pilgrimage to his Samadhi which would become a wish fulfilling sort of place.

Somehow, Swamiji communicated to me that he is calling those devotees who are so inclined to come and settle near the Samadhi and serve him by serving the multitudes who will come to visit, especially the poor. In turn, he communicated to me, Swamiji will take care of the devotees’ needs and they will remain very happy in such service. Swamiji can still initiate qualified persons into tapas, and it seemed like there would be a few doing tapas nearby. Swamiji’s shrine will promote world peace and the unity of people of all faiths in good will. It should have nothing to do with politics.

Swamiji said to me that leaving his body actually will result in much more being done in his name than if he had remained with us physically, which he had tried to do as long as he could to make his devotees happy, especially those who felt a need to see his body. The worldwide scope of his mission will increase due to his dropping the body. Swamiji said that we devotees can show our love for him by throwing ourselves whole heartedly into the work and by doing our meditation without fail. He will supply whatever else is needed.

—  —

On Easter Sunday I did a ritual in honor of Swamiji before my wall hangings of Jesus and Babaji, two of the world’s great masters. I felt it was a most appropriate day as Easter symbolizes resurrection. Little did I then know that Swamiji had left his body and his mahasamadhi had been performed the day before.

About a week later, a friend shared a powerful vision he had received on that Easter Sunday. He is not the “visionary” sort, so this experience was quite new and very real to him. He was lying in bed on Sunday morning when suddenly he found himself not in his room. He was in a cave. He could feel the dark, damp cold on his hands and face. He smelled the sharpness of mold and earth. He seemed to be searching. He felt the presence of two others and they said, “He is not here. He has gone to a better place.” When he found himself back in bed in his own room, he was compelled to quickly write down the words which came to his mind: “Jesus is the same as Pan, the same as Ganesha, the same as Quetzalcoatl, teaching us to be reborn in our truth, not by separating but by connecting.”

This friend’s experience immediately struck me as referring to Swamiji. I knew then that Swamiji must have left his body and had resurrected in spirit. I telephoned a close devotee in Seattle, and she sadly told me that Swamiji’s body had been buried the day before Easter Sunday.

—  —

After the mahasamadhi, my sister went to Adivarapupeta to stay at the ashram. My daughter and I traveled from England to visit her and attend the August 7th function there. The three of us stayed in one of the rooms on the main floor of the small ashram building. We shared the room with a silver haired grandmother from the Bangalore ashram, Ajji.

The first time my daughter and I saw bhava during this visit, we could not help but think the woman comical. Swamiji has blessed me with very powerful bhava for which I would give anything to experience again. But I wondered about bhava that was less intense, and I thought this woman’s bhava might be exaggerated. My daughter said, “Why don’t you go and do something or ask something?” Eventually, half-heartedly I went in front of this woman, just to say Swamiji I’ve come or whatever. I went in front of this woman and I burst out crying. I couldn’t help it. I knew that through this trance Swamiji’s power must have overtaken me.

Every day it rained heavily, turning everything into a muddy quagmire. One night about four days after our arrival, my daughter asked me to accompany her to the bathroom which was to the side and behind the ashram building. We would go out the front of the ashram building (facing the gate), and then around left towards the back of the ashram. About twenty or thirty yards in front, by the ashram gate, there is a light post. As we came out from the ashram building, I noticed bars and bars of fluorescent light flickering in the vicinity of that light post near the gate. I thought that was unusual and asked my daughter look at it. She said it’s raining and the rain was probably doing something to the light from the lamp and that’s what was flickering. So I didn’t think too much about it.

The next night my daughter and I again went out and headed to the back of the ashram. As I waited outside for my daughter, I was facing the ashram gate and looked up. On the light post I saw the form of Swamiji. He was in the same place where I had seen the fluorescent light bars the night before. As before, several inexplicable fluorescent bars of clear light flickered near the ordinary light post. I could clearly see Swamiji’s form: his face, beard and neck, a white shawl wrapped around his body, and even the detail of his hand holding the cloth as he always wore it.

I was startled because it was night. I looked away, then looked back because I was curious. The thought came that when my daughter came outside she would be negative again. As she came out, I said, “I’ve got something to tell you.” I didn’t have to tell her. She looked up and said, “My God, Mum, there’s Swamiji there.”

Both of us were startled, so rather than go back to our room the way we had come, we walked around the back side of the ashram building instead. Back in our room, we woke up my sister and told her we had seen Swamiji by the ashram gate. She was skeptical and did not believe us. She did not want to go outside to see for herself, perhaps because she had no desire to disprove us.

After a little while, we all went out front and looked across to the ashram entrance. Three of us could see Swamiji. We saw Swamiji’s form turn right once, then turn left once. Ajji confirmed whatever my daughter and I saw. Ajji went forward towards him but stopped a few feet away as she never took the liberty of going close to Swamiji without his permission. She stood silently for some time when it appeared as though Swamiji just went out of the gate.

My sister had seen nothing, so we came back into the room and debated again. I was completely convinced it was Swamiji. The form looked exactly like him, except that he appeared taller. My sister admitted that Swamiji had been appearing a little bit taller to several people in the village. Ajji finally declared that if it was Swamiji, he must come to her in a dream that same night.

That morning, Ajji got up and said she had a dream of Swami and it was a long one too.

—  —

During my stay at the Adivarapupeta ashram after the mahasamadhi, I had many experiences of Sri Swamiji. Every day Yashoda and I would ask each other about experiences in sleep or meditation. Whenever I had an experience or vision, she also would have the experience. Whenever I had none, she had none.

Before I went, I had planned to join a group on a pilgrimage that would set out around the 2nd of May. I had even prepaid my expenses for the trip. But I needed to accompany Yashoda to Adivarapupeta. About a week after we reached the ashram I had an experience in meditation. I saw a person smeared with vibhuti ask me to get into a car which would be coming along. A car came and I saw Swamiji inside, but he stopped me from getting into that car saying another was coming for me. The second car turned out to be like our ashram van. After I got inside, it slowly started growing in size and it turned into Nandi who took me up into the sky. Swamiji was down below clapping his hands and asking me to hold on tightly, visit Srisailam and return. [45]

On one dark night in the room we shared with several other women, a small light suddenly appeared and became as bright as a 1000 Watt light. There was no window or any other opening in the wall where the light was, yet it seemed to emerge from the wall. Two of us saw the light and became extremely excited and started calling out Swamiji’s name. The light again became a small and vanished.

One night I had a dream that somebody told me that Swamiji was in the old ashram at Bangalore. I went there and was told that he was behind the ashram. A lot of men surrounded Swamiji. There were no ladies. I was watching from a distance. I saw Swamiji raise his hand and call out to me telling me to either call this certain lady by phone or write a letter to her. The following morning I remembered the dream, but Swamiji had not told me anything about what I was to communicate to this lady. I did not have the lady’s telephone number, so I wrote her a letter in which I mentioned the dream. After a few days I received a reply letter from her. The lady wrote that her husband had been sick for a few days. For some reason he had refused to go and see the doctor or take any medicine. This worried the lady very much. She wrote that just before the postman had delivered my letter at her office, she saw Swamiji. That evening her husband surprisingly agreed to go to the hospital. He started taking medicine and he had recovered completely by the time the lady wrote me her reply.

On one occasion, I had the darshan of goddess Devi in the form of a woman. She was angry and indicated to me that something bad was about to happen. The next day a young boy living at the ashram began vomiting and became severely diarrheic. That same night Yashoda was in a deep trance of Swamiji and broke three coconuts in each direction of the newly constructed temple. At one place Swamiji paused for a while but did not break a coconut. It was in the direction of the small temple of Lord Anjaneya (Hanuman), just outside the ashram walls. Swamiji wanted Sri Kodandam to break that coconuts. On being questioned Swamiji said that because that was in the direction of Hanuman and Sri Kodandam was a devotee of Ram, he was asked to break the coconut.[46] The next day the boy was alright.

Sri Gopanna, the Adivarapupeta ashram vice-president, was composing the August function invitation and writing about the new temple construction. When he wrote that its construction was Swamiji’s last wish before death, Yashoda immediately went into Swamiji’s trance and asked them not to use the word “death.” They should use yoga nidra in samadhi. This disturbed me. That night I could see Swamiji sitting on the Samadhi all throughout my sleep. The next morning I offered milk at his Samadhi and when I put my head to the Samadhi, I could clearly hear breathing. This also happened on another day.

—  —

Swamiji told me that whenever I came to the Bangalore ashram, I first should go to the temple and pranam to the deities. In that temple, Swamiji had consecrated idols of Brahma, Vishnu, and Maheshwara (Lord Shiva), their spouses Saraswati, Lakshmi and Parvati, and the gods Ganesha, Subramanyan and Nandi. Each idol is carved out of black stone and through Swamiji’s tapas shakti, each idol had been imbued with a soul of the deity it represents.

When I arrived for the mahasamadhi celebration in Bangalore, I did pranam to all the sacred deities. I closed my eyes before Lord Shiva and I would see Swamiji’s face on the idol, beard and all, in black like the idol, as if carved in the black stone. I checked to see if it was my imagination, but each time I closed my eyes I saw the same vision. This happened to me only before Lord Shiva and not before Brahma or Vishnu.

—  —

Swamiji often used to wake up the ashram residents in the middle of the night. Swamiji used a stick to hit the gate outside our rooms. He would make us get up and come with him for a walk about the garden. We would enjoy the special time sitting around Swamiji, talking, and eating the prashad he gave us. Sometimes, one of us might not wake up, and Swamiji would scold us the next morning saying that we all were sleeping like water buffaloes. So those who stayed at the ashram became very accustomed to waking up when Swamiji called.

Over the many years I lived and served at the ashram with my wife and children, I became very used to Swamiji’s nocturnal revelries. On Saturday night, the day before the mahasamadhi in Bangalore, I heard Swamiji beating a stick on the gate outside my room. I immediately woke up and went outside. There I saw Swamiji beating the gate. After some time, Swamiji put his hand in his coat pocket and as I did namaskar by bowing to Swamiji, the vision vanished. I returned to my room and went back to sleep.

Months later I continue to see Swamiji in the ashram. One evening Swamiji was standing in front of my room carrying a trishula (trident). One afternoon after I had cleaned the meditation hall, I was about to get the dust bin. When I turned around I saw Swamiji with both his hands clasped behind him and holding a towel.

—  —

Swamiji’s Samadhi consecration in Bangalore had taken place the day before. I was sitting in dhyan next to the Samadhi in the middle of the Bangalore ashram garden. Although my eyes were closed, I saw Swamiji come up to me from the left and I felt Swamiji touch my left ear. I got up from my dhyan, then shortly resumed it. This time I saw Swamiji come up from my right side and, like before, I could very definitely feel his touch, this time on my right ear.

—  —

A young child a year and a half old, the son of a devotee, was present when a woman returned to the Bangalore ashram bringing some of the dark, clay-like mud from Swamiji’s mahasamadhi in Adivarapupeta. She had carried the earth between the broken halves of a coconut. When she separated the halves and took out the hardened mud, it had taken the rough form of Swamiji. We could see his head, arms, fingers and other features.

The child would point to the mud figure and mumble a lot of words. Suddenly we understood that the child was telling us to do abhishekam to Swamiji. This we did by pouring milk over the figure. Then the child pointed out Swamiji’s jata which we could distinguish very clearly. Then he started making signs asking us to hurry up and do something. At first we did not understand what the child wanted and guessed that maybe he wanted us to do bhajans. Then when the child pointed to the telephone, I guessed that he wanted me to telephone Adivarapupeta and find out when Swamiji’s jata would be arriving in Bangalore. The night before, devotees returning from Adivarapupeta had said the jata was coming, but we did not know when.

I telephoned Adivarapupeta and they told me that the jata was already on its way in Swamiji’s own car and had left at 6 a.m. that morning. Only then did it occur to me that we had to inform local devotees and organize a proper reception for Sri Swamiji’s jata just as if we were receiving Swamiji himself. Many people needed to be called, nadaswaram music arranged, bhajans organized, and food cooked for the people. The jata could arrive the next morning and we had very little time to prepare. But through the small child, Swamiji gave his devotees some warning.

—  —

I reached Adivarapupeta the second day after Swamiji left his body. That night I went into bhava samadhi and saw Swamiji. He told me that he is not going to come back into the body but would keep his body intact so that various devotees could come and have his darshan.

That Friday, April 1, the devotees gathered at Adivarapupeta got the message from Hyderabad that the bhajans should continue non-stop and Swamiji should return to his body by 3:00 or 3:30 that afternoon. But about that time when the other devotees believed that Swamiji would re-enter his body any moment, I saw that Swamiji had become united with the Shivalingam, and that if anyone prays to any Shivalingam they would be able to see him in it.

The following Tuesday, Swamiji’s car arrived at the Bangalore ashram accompanied by a large procession of devotees. The car was bringing Swamiji’s jata, his matted hair, from Adivarapupeta. The jata is about five feet long and it was wrapped in a white towel and carefully made to sit vertically on the back seat of the car, just as if Swamiji were sitting there. But instead of seeing Swamiji’s jata in the back seat, I actually saw Swamiji himself sitting in the car wearing a white shawl. When the jata was brought out of the car, I could feel the current flowing from the jata to my body. I went into bhava samadhi and Swamiji told me that his jata should not be put into the samadhi.[47] He also told me that he was still experiencing pain from the process of mahasamadhi at Adivarapupeta. It was nobody’s fault, but a lot of people had touched and lifted him and he was still feeling the resulting pain.

After the jata was placed on Swamiji’s dais in the meditation hall, I saw Swamiji sitting there in his physical form. He sat there for a long time. That night Swamiji told me that he was feeling very hot and asked me to arrange for a fan.

Throughout the next night I could see Swamiji in the garden distributing prasadam. During Swamiji’s mahasamadhi in Bangalore, I went into trance and saw Swamiji joining in the purnahuti during the homa[48] and later giving darshan in the hall. It was as though he was conducting the homa and program as usual. At the end, I saw Swamiji lying on the Samadhi. Later that afternoon while devotees chanted the Mrityunjaya Mantra before Swamiji’s picture set out by the Samadhi, I saw the real Swamiji in the picture, moving his head quite normally.

I received Swamiji’s guarantee that he is very much here. Whenever I close my eyes I see Swamiji. All these experiences began happening after the jata was brought to the ashram.

—  —

Shortly after Swamiji’s mahasamadhi, we were visiting a friend in Delhi who was telling us the story about how the glass on her photograph of Swamiji broke at the same time as Swamiji left his body. She showed us the picture which she kept in her puja area. Then she said she had something special to show us.

She reached into her closet to pull out a carefully stored box. Inside was a small jata, a lock of matted hair, which had fallen off of Swamiji’s head many years earlier. Swamiji had given it to her. She allowed us to hold the jata. When I took it in my hand, I felt a great power and saw Swamiji standing before me.

—  —

I was sleeping near the pit which had been dug for Swamiji’s Samadhi at the Bangalore ashram. I was crying. Then I heard some noise and saw Swamiji walking towards me with a stick in his hand. I asked Swamiji why all this happened. Swamiji answered, “No, nothing has happened. I have only left my physical body.” Then Swamiji patted me on the back and asked whether the rudraksha trees were bearing fruit and whether the plants in the garden were being cared for. Swamiji assured me that he was always here and he warned me not to quarrel with the others staying at the ashram!

—  —

Swamiji came in trance upon the wife of a recent devotee and for over an hour he gave instructions about the Shivalingam to be installed at the Samadhi in Bangalore and many other detailed instructions on what was to be done at the ashram. Swamiji complained that his rooms at the ashram had not been cleaned and that they should be every day. “You should not think that Swamiji is not here,” he said. Then he complained he was being bothered by all the mosquitoes and the mosquito curtain had not been drawn around his bed. He gave instructions to put up the curtain every evening, then draw it back every morning, just as always.

Just the night before, I had cleaned the carpet in Swamiji’s room, so I was wondering why Swamiji complained about the cleaning. I immediately went to Swamiji’s room and found many flower petals on and around his bed. I had forgotten that they had fallen when we laid Swamiji’s jata on his bed. I cleaned them up.

Just the day before, it had occurred to me to put up the mosquito net, but I thought that without a physical body, the mosquitoes would not bother Swamiji. The two previous nights I had slept outside Swamiji’s room, as always, and I was terribly bothered by the mosquitoes even though I had turned on a fan to create a strong draft. That night after I put out the net around Swamiji’s bed, I slept outside his room without the fan and the mosquitoes did not bother me.

—  —

Over the many years I have known Swamiji, we used to spend long times together in conversation. Sometimes Swamiji and I would just joke and talk about small things, and many times Swamiji would tell me amazing things or I would ask Swamiji all sorts of questions. People used to say that I joked a lot with Swamiji and he joked a lot with me. Swamiji enjoyed our conversations.

Over the years Swamiji also would come to me in dreams and we would converse for hours. When Swamiji appeared, it would normally be around the middle of the night. I would remember the dreams and what we talked about quite clearly upon awakening, and Swamiji used those dreams to give me a lot of information and tell me whatever I had to do. These dreams were quite vivid and concrete.

My wife and I traveled to Bangalore where we attended the mahasamadhi. That night, we returned to our room in a nearby guest house and went to sleep. About the middle of the night Swamiji came to me in my dreams. We were talking and joking for a long time. We enjoyed our conversation as always.

—  —

In the United States, a devotee in Portland, Oregon, found out about Swamiji leaving his body and attended a meditation organized for local devotees on Saturday, April 2, the day of Sri Swamiji’s mahasamadhi in Adivarapupeta. In her meditation, Sri Swamiji came to the devotee and asked what he could do for her. All sorts of thoughts and personal issues arose in her mind in the way of a response. Then she saw Swamiji walk around the room and stand in front of each devotee and give a blessing. He did this three times, going to each devotee and blessing them individually.

—  —

Several devotees who had gone to Adivarapupeta for Swamiji’s mahasamadhi returned to the Bangalore ashram at about 11 p.m. on Sunday, April 3. Those of us who had stayed in Bangalore received them and we all spent some time talking. Suddenly we noticed that one of the women, a long time devotee who had served Swamiji personally for over ten years, was in bhava samadhi from Sri Swamiji’s presence.

Swamiji talked to his devotees very pleasantly. He asked one of us to describe the mahasamadhi in detail and he said that it had been done very nicely. Then he said that henceforth, his mission would become very big. He asked for a little milk and drank it. He assured his devotees that he has not left us and that just like he used to come over two of the ashram women in trance, he would continue to do so and give instructions from time to time. He told us that henceforth the devotee upon whom he was in bhava will not be like she had been until then. Her life was going to change and she will play a different role.

Swamiji also advised his devotees not to quarrel, but have a meeting whenever required and reach a decision peacefully. “Just like you have a meeting now and see Swamiji is here, in the same way Swamiji will come and give guidance.”

—  —

At the Bangalore ashram on Monday, April 4, 1994, Swamiji came in bhava and told his devotees that more and very big work was ahead of them. What had been done while Swamiji was in his physical body was nothing compared to what was to be done in the future. “You would understand the size of the mission only in the future.” Swamiji told us that the puja in the temple should be continued. The next night, Swamiji said that all devotees should come together and give their support to the Trust and that he would give a lot of power and courage for the Trust to do its work.

—  —

A large, extended family lives in the house of this long-time devotee of Swamiji. For decades he has invited Sri Swamiji to come to the house for a pada puja, the ceremonial washing of the guru’s feet with water, milk, yogurt, fruit, coconut water and honey. It was an annual occasion when the family would feed many hundreds and thousands of people. There is a bedroom in the house which was set aside for Swamiji’s exclusive use. He would stay there on these annual visits, but otherwise the room was used only for prayer and meditation.

The grandchildren in that household range from two years old to young teenagers. They are all very close to Swamiji and, as is often the case with children, their innocent hearts and minds are sensitive to all sorts of divine manifestations which adults have long since learned to ignore. One of the young teenage girls described this experience which happened on April 11, 1994.

After dhyan at home we were in Swamiji’s room repeating the Mrityunjaya Mantra.[49] I was looking at Swamiji’s photo. Suddenly I looked at the lamp we keep burning near the photo. Something was pulling me towards the lamp, pulling me to keep gazing into its light. After a while, about two minutes, I saw the lamp split into two. One stayed in the lamp’s normal position and the other went moving about and I watched it go to the opposite end of the room. There I saw something bright like the sun. It was a light, a jyoti, about twelve feet away from me. Inside the jyoti, towards the bottom on one side, was a black dot. I kept repeating the mantra. After some time, I blinked then I saw the dot move to the middle of the circle of light. I blinked again, then saw a thick, horizontal line across the light. The next time I looked at the jyoti it was above the line.

I could not concentrate anywhere but on that jyoti. The jyoti started coming closer to me until it filled my entire vision. It became bigger, then smaller. Finally I saw Swamiji inside the jyoti. The black spot was on his forehead and he was smiling broadly.

A ten year old had this experience on April 2, 1994:

We children were at home sitting in meditation in the hall. While I was in meditation, I saw Swamiji walk out from his room and come up to me. He said something to me which I do not remember. Swamiji applied vibhuti to my forehead. Then Swamiji walked back into his room.

Some of the very young children are constantly acting as if Swamiji was really in his room and they admonish the adults in the house to respect Swamiji’s presence. When these children are in Swamiji’s room, they go up to his bed and fan him as if Swamiji was sitting there. When they are not attending to Swamiji, they are praying, and if the little one sees someone else in Swamiji’s room who is not mindful of Swamiji’s presence, she scolds them as if to say, “Can’t you see Swamiji is here?”

One Sunday, a cousin and I came to the ashram. We went to the hall. Swamiji was sitting down. Granny was doing arati. We sat down. After sometime we talked to Swamiji. He was pink, the eyes were blue. His jata was thick and long. After some time he got up. He went near the door of the hall and came back.

—  —

On Thursday, April 14, the Bangalore devotees organized a special homa by Swamiji’s Samadhi. The Mrittunjaya Mantra was chanted 10,000 times before a large photograph of Swamiji. The homa started at 8:00 A.M. and it took until about 7:30 P.M. before it was completed. At any time, there were twenty to thirty people participating.

I traveled with some other American devotees to India almost immediately after Swamiji left his body and we were at the ashram to participate in the homa and the all day chanting. By mid-afternoon, I felt drained of energy and took a short break. It was then that an Indian devotee explained to me that the Mrittunjaya Mantra literally meant victory over death and would bring the dead back to life.

I returned to the homa and found that somehow I had forgotten how to chant the mantra. Several times I tried to join in the chanting, but the words failed to come. Suddenly I felt a surge of energy and the mantra came back. All of a sudden I could say the Sanskrit words loud and clear.

It was then that I saw three or four of the Indian women opposite from me looking at Swamiji’s photograph. I turned my head and saw that Swamiji was alive in the picture. He was moving and breathing. Then I saw Swamiji’s body become about ten feet tall, standing by the homa fire with his head touching the pandal. In my mind I said “Swamiji, you are so big.” Swamiji just laughed in his sweet way, and then he became really huge. The top of his head covered the entire four acre gardens at the ashram and the rest of his body was submerged. I saw a twinkle in Swamiji’s eye and that twinkle was the fire of the homa. I could see everyone who was sitting around the homa fire, and they were all just a tiny dot in the pupil of Swamiji’s eye. Throughout this vision, I was quite awake and conscious, and Swamiji was sweetly laughing.

It occurred to me that the mantra worked and Swamiji was back even bigger than life. At the end of the homa, all the devotees walked around Swamiji’s Samadhi. Sitting there for some time was a man in Swamiji’s bhava, his hands in the same unmistakable posture as Swamiji’s. Some others ahead of me pranamed to Swamiji’s astral body in this man. When I pranamed, Swamiji, through the man in his bhava, hit me on the back in a blessing.

After Swamiji’s mahasamadhi I continually experienced Swamiji’s presence much more strongly than before. On one occasion during my stay at the Bangalore ashram, a uniquely beautiful crow alighted near me and gave me a look that was Swamiji. I saw Swamiji in Swamiji’s dog (Ramo by name), birds, and various people looking at me. I knew the difference between when it was Swamiji and when it was just a crow, dog or person. Once I was meditating by Swamiji’s Samadhi when Ramo came up and affectionately licked me. I did not break my meditation, but I felt grateful for Swamiji’s blessing.

Swamiji’s presence in various living beings was soon confirmed in a rather dramatic way. The morning after I felt Swamiji’s blessings through Ramo’s affectionate lick, I was walking towards the Samadhi for meditation and saw Ramo. I could not walk by the dog without giving him an affectionate hug. Ramo immediately followed me to the Samadhi. There one of my traveling companions was already in deep meditation by the samadhi. Ramo bounded up to him and put two paws on his chest. He later described to me what he experienced at that moment. He felt a surge of energy pass through his heart chakra, as if the touch had opened the chakra. He opened his eyes and instead of seeing the dog Ramo, he saw Swamiji hugging him.

—  —

Since Sri Swamiji left his body, I have been seeing his face very often. This began at home in the United States and continued throughout my trip to Bangalore, Adivarapupeta and Dehradun which was hastily organized after we found out Swamiji had left his body. I would see Sri Swamiji about six to twelve inches in front of my face. This would happen when I was awake and frequently throughout the day while doing all sorts of things, whether at home or driving my car on the freeway. I look through Swamiji’s face to attend to whatever it is I have to do.

—  —

Each Sunday evening, Swamiji’s devotees in Seattle get together for meditation and bhajans. Sunday night on May 22, 1994, we played a very devotional bhajan from India. The song was new to most of the dozen or so people there so we had difficulty with the words.

I gave up trying to find the words and was looking at the large photograph of Swamiji which is before us during meditation and bhajans. Light from the sun shone from a window onto the wall behind the photograph. The photo itself leans on an easel about five feet in front of the wall. In the sunbeam I saw a face. It was very clear, like looking at a picture. I said to the devotee next to me, “look at the light on the wall. There’s a face in it.” She looked and also saw the face. The face was of a younger man, that of a young Swamiji. He had a very big smile with glowing, dark eyes. He was very happy. Below his face were several smaller faces, also very joyful, like spirits accompanying Swamiji. As the bhajan slowed down and ended, the smaller faces faded away, then Swamiji’s face disappeared leaving a white cloud like that in the photograph of Swamiji’s light form taken during his mahasamadhi.

The two of us saw the faces all the time that one bhajan was being sung, a period of several minutes. The vision was very clear. Two other devotees saw an unusual white light during this time and in the same place as the two of us had seen the faces. They described this white light as looking just like the white cloud the two of us saw and as in the photograph of Swamiji’s astral body. So all told, four devotees saw Swamiji throughout that bhajan.

—  —

The news of Swamiji leaving his body quickly got around among American devotees and I found out within a few days. That Sunday, the day after Swamiji’s mahasamadhi in Adivarapupeta, I was at a very big party, an annual Easter Sunday brunch given by a friend in his large artist’s studio in Portland.

It was a large room and there was a band playing in front. I looked to one side and I saw Swamiji. He appeared as if suspended well above the crowd but below the open loft ceiling. He was about the same size as ordinary. He was smiling a terrific smile, full living color. He wore an orange cloth. Every time I looked in that direction, he was there. This lasted two hours. As far as I knew, no one else saw him. I mentioned it only to my son and another who felt Swamiji’s presence but couldn’t see him.

At this time I knew Swamiji had left his body but I could feel his presence all the time. It was even closer than usual. It was not the same as his physical presence, but it was strong.

Some weeks later I was going to meditate. I was getting into the state where I believe I can feel Swamiji’s presence. I thought perhaps Swamiji could do something special, like maybe make a candle light up. Instead, something happened to a nearby, rather massive sand candle which was a gift from a friend. It was already burning but all the wax suddenly burst into flame and was consumed.

—  —

I went to Bangalore in August of 1993 to live there for a year. When the news came that Swamiji had left his body, I joined the small group of Bangalore devotees who immediately left for Adivarapupeta. I returned and arrived at the Bangalore ashram on Sunday, April 16, 1994.

A couple of days later, it was dark and I was walking up to the meditation hall for bhajans. There was really nothing in my mind while I walked by the side of the building, the ashram garden on my left. As I passed by the path leading to the newly covered Samadhi, I glanced to my left and saw Swamiji sitting by the Samadhi. All this happened in an instant. Swamiji was wearing a white cloth and facing me. Someone was fanning him. Inside my mind I thought, “Oh, Swamiji’s in the garden” as I continued to walk towards the bhajans. Then it immediately struck me, “How can that be? Swamiji’s left his body.”

I turned about and headed towards the Samadhi shrine, somewhat apprehensive. There I found a man in Swamiji’s bhava being fanned by somebody. He was in the same position as I had seen Swamiji. I did a pranam to Swamiji’s spirit in him and turned around and left to go to the bhajans.

—  —

London devotees meet for meditation and bhajans on the final Sunday of each month. As usual, the devotees gathered at the little hall in Wimbledon, South London. This night became a most special evening because of Swamiji recently having left his body.

Silently in meditation and vocally in bhajans, the devotees shared the comfort that Swamiji gives when we think of him. They also shared the strangeness of the knowledge of their Swamiji’s physical departure. But it became most evident that Sri Shivabalayogi’s energy is as manifest now as it has always been. Various devotees experienced trance and visions. One devotee related her experience as follows:

I had a vision of Swamiji Shivabalayogi being garlanded with beautiful bright blue flowers. Somebody came up to Sri Swamiji and anointed his head and he was led to a white dais. There were people behind this white dais but I could not see them. It was too bright. Then someone placed a cloak around Swamiji. It was maroon velvet and draped to one side. Then he was given a silver staff. I heard a voice from behind the dais say, “This is for his greatness.”

As Swamiji walked away after this ceremony, people threw white flowers at his feet. Swamiji looked modest and shy at this great honor.

Two weeks later, the London devotees had a special program in honor of Swamiji’s mahasamadhi. About forty-five devotees attended and the same woman who had the vision experienced its continuation.

Sri Swamiji was led to a futuristic carriage. It was a most unusual craft which Swamiji boarded, not altogether unlike a roller coaster. This carriage took Swamiji to a destination which exuded a golden visual presence.

—  —

In my dream, I was talking with friends when a woman suddenly appeared before me. I “knew” this woman but could not specifically recognize her. I began to tell her of my grief as losing the physical presence of Swamiji. While I was talking to her, Swamiji appeared in actual size above her left shoulder, levitating in a sitting yoga posture. He had a beatific expression on his face and showered quiet blessings upon me. I began to cry as I continued to tell the woman how I used to talk to Swamiji quite frequently and now I couldn’t call him on the telephone any more or be with his physical body. Swamiji continued to float above her in silence. His presence was so real while the others were not as distinct. I felt as I often felt in Swamiji’s presence, bliss and joy, and all the hairs on my body stood on end.

When I finished telling her, she commiserated with me, being very understanding and sharing her sadness with me. Then we hugged and before I knew it I found myself hugging a Shivalingam. It took me by such surprise that I did not immediately realize what it was and awoke. It was about eleven at night and I was still aware of Swamiji’s continuing presence all around me. I felt as if he were still floating in the air before me.

The previous Sunday I had found myself crying before Swamiji’s picture feeling immense sorrow over the loss of his physical form. As I cried I said to him, “Don’t You care that I miss You so much? I know You’re not gone, but You don’t care that I feel so much pain because I can’t call You any more, or go to see You, or bring You here?” I felt so intensely sad that the world had lost the physical presence of a being as great as Jesus and Lord Buddha, and I was so sad for all the people who would not get to meet him physically. Then I had this dream two nights later and the following day I felt supremely peaceful and deeply moved. I could tangibly feel Swamiji’s love and support for me.

—  —

Sri Swamiji dedicates the foundation of the new temple at the Adivarapupeta ashram.

Sri Swamiji dedicated the foundation of the new temple at Adivarapupeta at 1:47 A.M. on Saturday, March 19, 1994. As far as I know, the photographs I took of him on that occasion are the last taken while he was in his physical body. Two of the photos taken after the moment of consecration show an inexplicable anomaly. However, I did not notice it for several days because I was so preoccupied by the jyoti swarupa photo I had taken on the next roll of film. When I finally did notice similar white clouds of light on the temple foundation photos, I suspected they too were astral bodies. Who would believe that I took not one photo of an astral body, but three?

I waited several months until Sri Swamiji was in the United States in shakti rupa upon R. B. Singh. Then I asked him to explain the unusual lights in the two temple foundation photos. “Is this a good time to ask Swamiji about the photos I took of the temple foundation laying?”

“Yes. What do you have to ask?”

“These are two pictures I took when Swamiji was consecrating the foundation. This looks strangely like another subtle body, astral body.”

“It’s because the pranaprathistha [50] was being done. At that time it was being done for the deities in the temple. That’s the reason it appears in the picture like this. This power that Swamiji has given to the deities is going to remain with the deities for a very, very long time.”

“Which deities are these in the photo, Shiva?”

“Shiva and Parvati” came his answer.

“How is it that the camera caught these images?”

“It’s to show to the devotees. Once the power goes into the temple, it goes to both. Shiva and Devi have come into Swamiji’s body.[51] So the power is given back to Them. The power is moving from Swamiji’s body towards the idols. That’s why you see it like that.”

The Dyana Mandir in March of 1994, shortly before construction of the new temple that replaced it.

Photo taken from behind Sri Swamiji’s head looking towards the trench where the blessed, northeast corner-brick is being laid. The light from Sri Swamiji’s head is going to the right and behind, in the direction of the Ardhanareeshwara Lingam and Devi inside the Dhyana Mandir. The light is Shiva-Shakti.

DARSHAN

Conversations with Swamiji through Bhava

I have just arrived in Adivarapupeta and I had Swamiji’s darshan through trance. He has given me this message to communicate to you. His first words were a gentle scolding to me because I had been crying. He is not happy with devotees who would cry. He is not dead so why do we make a scene as if he is? He insists that we not cry. He is being very clear about this. He is with us.

Our most important connection to Swamiji is meditation. Everything depends upon this. How well and how earnestly we meditate will bring all manner of blessings to us in the form of instructions, visions, and trance. It is the single most important factor of our practice. It is important for us to follow the instructions for his meditation and not to open our eyes or leave our seat. We should sit for our intended time even if our mind is unsettled, for it is the earnest effort that counts. Swamiji said that if we try hard he will come and make it easy for us. The strength of our conscious relationship with Swamiji depends upon our meditation. Instructions will come to us through our meditation. With good and consistent practice Swamiji will come to his devotees through visions. It is necessary to write everything down about our visions afterward so that we do not forget any part of it.

Swamiji will come in trance when the practice of the group is strong and consistent. Swamiji stressed again and again the importance of meditation. Swamiji is with us. We know this through meditation. He is here. He is alive for each devotee who would turn to him.

Swamiji laughed and joked with each devotee during his presence in trance. He is blessing and instructing us. He is inviting us to discover the treasure of his Presence through meditation.

—  —

Since his mahasamadhi, Sri Swamiji is coming in bhava samadhi more often and through more people to reassure devotees of his continued, tangible presence. Conversations with Swamiji since his mahasamadhi are especially amazing to those who knew and conversed with him over many years while he was in his own body. They recognize not only Sri Swamiji’s language, demeanor and message, but Sri Swamiji knows them intimately in a way no one else could know.

The consistent and repeated message which Sri Swamiji is giving is the need to meditate. All the various practical demonstrations of miracles, phenomena, visions and divine bliss are only aids for us develop on the path of meditation which is the most important spiritual practice. Meditation is the light which will dispel the darkness in the world. Shivabalayogi is meditation. His blessings through initiation bring about a profound transformation and concentration in the person who practices meditation. One’s religion, beliefs, spiritual practices and commitments to spiritual teachers are all deepened through the utterly selfless and loving blessings of this great Jagadguru, a Universal Teacher.

Sri Swamiji reminds us that the goal of meditation is to drop our ignorant identification with the physical body and develop spiritual consciousness. No miraculous healing, divine conversation, powerful spiritual trance, or awesome vision is as important in our lives as the peace, clarity and understanding we experience through meditation and the blessings of a Self realized master. Meditation beneficially affects our health, our work, our relationships, our knowledge of who we are, and our sense of purpose in this life. Our lives quietly and subtly become transformed and we tangibly experience in our beings what the mystics in all spiritual traditions have declared: God is the bliss within and all around us.

While he was in his own physical body, Sri Swamiji instructed his devotees to initiate others into meditation even when he was physically absent. He explained that he will always be present through an astral body which actually transmits the spiritual blessing. Many people, especially in the United States, have received Sri Swamiji’s initiation in this manner both before and after he dropped the physical form. Some had been meditating for a long time, others hardly at all. Yet common to all from the initiation was a deeper and more blissful concentration than ever before experienced. The greater the prior experience with meditation, the greater was the effect of Swamiji’s initiation. Some with no prior experience had divine visions, and almost all found that the one hour meditation had sped by as if a few minutes. Such is the effect of a yogi’s grace.

To experience Sri Swamiji’s presence fully requires a practical spirituality. We have to practice meditation. Sri Swamiji’s duty is to help us meditate, bring us to spiritual consciousness, give us the experience of God consciousness (samadhi), and guide us to Self realization. It is through regular daily meditation that we really know The Living Yogi. To help bring and develop us on the line of meditation, Sri Swamiji continues to be with us in a physical body through bhava. Everyone can experience the transforming blessing of Sri Swamiji’s darshan merely by being in his presence. In this additional and very practical sense, Sri Shivabalayogi Maharaj is The Living Yogi.

The following questions and answers are edited and reorganized from transcripts of tape recordings and notes of several different conversations with Sri Swamiji through bhava samadhi. They are only a small sample of how Swamiji continues to converse with devotees and to assure them that Swamiji is The Living Yogi who actively loves and cares for the devotees.

Blessings

Portland, Oregon, 1991.

Be calm. Blessings. Blessings to the American devotees. Be calm. Don’t worry. Swamiji sends his blessings to all devotees whether they are in America, Australia, France, England or anywhere in the world. They should be told to write in a diary whatever questions they may have. I will definitely answer them, either in dhyana or in dream or in some other way.

Do not be afraid. Swamiji is always with you. You need to continue the work. Swamiji will come back in bhava from time to time as required. You will continue to get guidance. Swamiji will give enough courage and willpower for all the devotees around the world who are working. Swamiji is always there, everywhere.

I still miss Swamiji’s physical body.

Does Swamiji have only one body? Swamiji has lots of bodies. He’s lost one body, but he still has plenty of others. If you do good meditation you will be able to see him. Whichever body you want, that body will come.

Swamiji’s Mahasamadhi

On the day Swamiji left his body, he complained of a very sharp and severe pain going up his body. Early that morning Swamiji said, “Amma, my kundalini is rising.” What was that? Was that correct?

Yes, that’s true.

So the pain was caused by the kundalini rising?

Yes.

One would think that a God realized yogi would be able to raise the kundalini without any problem.

If the kundalini shakti comes up to a higher level, Swamiji would be in samadhi. Then he won’t be able to talk with people, or walk or travel. So he had to keep it suppressed so that he would be able to speak to people. Swamiji had not been in samadhi for a long time before he went into yoga nidra and mahasamadhi. That’s the reason he experienced pain.

How long had it been since he had been in samadhi?

About six months. Had he gone into samadhi, he would have left his body a long time earlier.

He would not have been able to re-enter his body?

If he remains in samadhi for a long time, he doesn’t have the desire to come back to the body. That’s the reason he did not go into samadhi.

What happened to the body over those six months that when the kundalini finally rose up it caused so much pain?

The body remained normal, but because he had suppressed the kundalini, he had to experience pain when he finally went into yoga nidra and left his body.

Swamiji did not want to leave the body right now, but the trouble his body gave him and the amount of pain he had was really unbearable. All the plans Swamiji had made were to stay in his body. But he was forced to leave it. His body was so bad that he had to leave it.

Swamiji wanted to be with all the devotees before he left, but he could not. So whenever a devotee thinks of Swamiji, his astral body will be present.

Swamiji, we feel that we have not taken care of your physical body. Do you also think that we are responsible for this mistake of ours?

No, Swamiji does not think of this. Even if someone were to misbehave, Swamiji will forgive that person. If a yogi does not forgive, will he not be like any ordinary human being? Swamiji forgives. After all, what intelligence do you have? You act according to whatever level of intelligence you have. Swami forgives.

There has been misconduct. Swamiji knows about all that. Swamiji’s work is to forgive. In the yogi’s kingdom, everyone is the same. Even when the most wicked people come, the yogi loves them and makes them holy people. If I see only faults, then who will come to me? I see people’s good points. If Swamiji says who is good or who is bad, then nobody will come to his kingdom. Nobody will come to his court and take initiation from him.

It is more important to Swamiji that you carefully listen to his instructions. What Swamiji is saying, give heed to it. You all should do meditation. If you do your meditation well, Swamiji will give more blessings. Take the example of a teacher and his class. He teaches that class again and again and again. As many times as he teaches, his knowledge and his power increases. If you do more, you gain more.

What did you think of the mahasamadhi function? Swamiji was there to see everything went on well.

Was Swamiji giving instructions through the young girl who was in bhava?

Swamiji gave bhava to the girl to give directions. That girl became all right.

During Swamiji’s mahasamadhi, Swamiji came in my dream. Swamiji was lying and covered by a big umbrella. People were saying that Swamiji is no more, that Swamiji is dead. …

Never say “dead.” Swamiji never dies. Don’t use this word ever again. Swamiji is sitting in front of you and you are saying that Swamiji is finished? During the mahasamadhi you did not see Swamiji’s body, but you should have seen Swamiji’s soul. Swamiji’s soul was there.[52] Swami never dies. The soul is immortal.

Isn’t it true that even a yogi like Swamiji is affected by pain or feelings of loss or disappointment?

No, that is only temporary. Swamiji was never sad. From where can he get sadness? A lot of Swamiji’s devotees doubt this, even very close and dear devotees.

Swamiji was scheduled to leave for programs in Sri Lanka when Adinarayana[53] died, but he did not cancel the programs. He changed nothing and went ahead with the programs.

What about when Swamiji’s mother passed away?

People expect a person to behave in a certain manner when his mother dies. If he doesn’t behave in that manner, then they draw all kinds of conclusions about the person. They would say that he didn’t have enough love for his mother. To avoid that, Swamiji had to behave in a certain way. Swamiji was not really affected by the death of his mother. That was all to show people in the external world.

In some of the photographs of Swamiji taken in the weeks before his mahasamadhi, it almost looks like there is fear in his eyes. Was that just a passing thing?

No, that was not fear. He was concerned about the future of the devotees. That concern is what you saw in his eyes, not fear.

The devotees who are meditating, most of them have not attained siddhi. It is Swamiji’s responsibility to see that they attain siddhi. Had they attained a certain stage, their attachment to Swamiji’s body would be nothing. The few who have attained a certain level in meditation have a connection with Swamiji that is spiritual rather than physical. To them, the loss of the body meant nothing. But for others who still have to come to at least that stage, for them the body of Swamiji was very much required. They miss Swamiji very much. If they don’t do the meditation in this life, they will have to continue the meditation in the next life. And again it will be Swamiji’s responsibility to see that that they attain siddhi.

See what’s happening now. A few people who have attained siddhi have not been affected in any way. But there are others who simply stopped meditating. After Swamiji left his body, they’re not doing any meditation at all. This was Swamiji’s concern, that those people still needed Swamiji’s body and without it they may not be able to achieve the siddhi.

Was Swamiji’s concern the same as what Jesus had the night before the crucifixion? The Bible says that he had some fear, but was it concern for the sake of the disciples?

He had twelve devotees. His concern about them was seen as fear. The physical presence of the body is essential for those devotees who have not come up to a certain stage and if they stop their practice. That is what is of concern to Swamiji. The body is not essential for him to do the work.

Why did Swamiji cry? One example was the last time he was in dialysis in Bangalore he was telling us how he loved the people of Adivarapupeta and how they loved him. He cried. He shed tears.

Since when have you had this in your mind?

For many months.

Isn’t it nice that you were thinking about that?

The other example was the last time Swamiji had dialysis in Kakinada when some devotees came in and were talking with Swamiji about other devotees. The conversation seemed to make Swamiji sad and he shed tears. My understanding is that it was unusual for Swamiji to be crying.

Swamiji never had grief, but that happened. He had tears in his eyes. They serve to make sure his devotees can remember him. Even now you keep remembering that.

I thought it was beautiful. We were all touched.

It’s for the devotees so they would again and again think of that.

Were they tears of love or tears of sadness?

They came for the devotees. The advantage is that the devotees think about him again and again, like you are thinking. That’s good for the devotees. It’s beneficial for the devotees to be thinking of him a long time after his body is gone. That’s the reason he cried. They will forget everything else but that. That will remain in their hearts. Once they get that, they will have a mental connection with Swamiji. That will remain for a long time. They will do a lot of meditation. That’s the advantages the devotee gets. That’s the reason a lot of gurus suffer like that. All that was for the devotees. What does Swamiji have to do with that? It happens automatically for the sake of the devotees.

Swamiji asked for the temple foundation to be dedicated exactly at 1:47 A.M. Then nine days later, Swamiji almost every fifteen minutes kept asking for the time. Then he left his body at 1:47 P.M. What’s the significance?

According to Swamiji’s birth chart, the position of the planets was good at that time. When the shankusthapana[54] of the temple was done, he had to look into the good of the village. That time was good for the village, which is why he did it then.

Is there anything to the numbers themselves? Is it a coincidence they were both 1:47?

No, there’s no relation.[55]

Three nights before Swamiji left his body, Swamiji had a dream about two men, one with a crocodile head and the other with a monkey head, and they were taking Swamiji away. Swamiji described that dream to people several times that day. Is there any special significance to that dream?

Swamiji was not willing to leave the body. That’s the reason he had a dream like that.

The two people in the dream were taking him away from the body?

Yes. Those were the soldiers of Yama, the people who take away the lives of those who are to die.

They did not have the power to take your life because you are a yogi. They cannot do that to you.

They could not really come and take me away from my body, that’s true. That was only a dream. But in this dream I saw these two people coming and take me. A yogi has the freedom to chose when to leave his body all by himself. Even the soldiers of Yama can not do anything to him.

So with hindsight we realize now that it was a clue, that something was going to happen.

Yes.

It seems that close devotees of Swamiji would experience pains similar to what Swamiji was experiencing. This seems to have been especially true in the weeks before Swamiji left his body. Swamiji had stomach pain. A close devotee had stomach pain. Is that true and why is it?

Those devotees who relate to Swamiji’s physical body would have their bodies affected. Those who relate with their minds, they would have their minds affected. Those who relate to the spirit, they would have no effect at all.

Indications

While he was in his body, Swamiji always assured his devotees that he will live for a very long time. Why did he suddenly leave his body?

His body did not support him. What could he do? Swamiji fought with Lord Shankara to be allowed to come down again into his body. But Swamiji’s body did not support him, so he could do nothing about it.

Did Swamiji know while going to Adivarapupeta that his final time is coming?

Swamiji gave indications but you did not listen. On his 59th birthday he knew it the whole time and he gave indications. He said that his life was complete and how much more life Swamiji will have depends on the prayers of devotees. Swamiji said this again and again, but nobody understood.

When Swamiji went to Adivarapupeta, he wanted to construct a new temple there. For that he got the wall broken around the old Dhyana Mandir and he got sand and other building material collected. He wanted that ashram to be ready. But in the meantime, his body did not support him. What could he do? Swamiji was fighting with Lord Shankara, “Give me some time.” It was a fight between Guru and disciple that he wanted to live for some more time and the Guru was not allowing. What could Swamiji do? That was the wish of God, so don’t grieve for it.

Swamiji, in Satya Yuga, yogis used to give clear indications about their mahasamadhi.

In the present era it’s not done. It is Kali Yuga. It is not possible now. In the Satya Yuga, the rivers had milk instead of water and you all used to drink milk. At that time, even the water offered as prashad in temples [charamrit] was milk. Now all the rivers have water and you drink water. Now the charamrit you get is water.

When exactly did Swamiji come to know that he would leave the body because it had become unfit for his mission?

On the January birthday function when all of you were there. At that time, a couple of times Swamiji said, “Today Swamiji’s life has completed. How much life Swamiji has depends upon the devotion of his devotees.” Several times I indicated that Swamiji’s life was completed that day and how much more he stays depends upon the devotees’ prayers. I said this again and again. I mentioned this when everyone was eating. I mentioned this when we were cutting cake.

Swamiji did a drama while cutting the cake. Swamiji said that he was going to sit for another forty years. That was a drama. But what could he do when his body was not supporting him?

If devotees did not understand the indications, why did you not correct them?

It is not done like this. A yogi never says he is going to leave this body. If a yogi says like that then there would be chaos all over. Could you leave the ashram and return home if you knew Swamiji was going to leave his body? Devotees would not be able to leave their guru, so yogis don’t have permission to tell. Swami’s devotees are all over the world. They would have come here and grieved and cried. Can a mother leave her body if her child knows she is going to leave? Can a wife leave her husband or a husband leave his wife? There was no need to tell people very clearly that Swamiji was going to leave his body.

Swamiji’s devotees love their guru very much. It’s like a mother loving her children, a wife loving her husband, and a brother loving his brother. Swamiji’s devotees were fighting with Lord Shankara and praying to Him to leave their guru’s life and take their lives instead. They were prepared to sacrifice their lives for the guru’s life. Save our guru’s life, the devotees asked Lord Shankara again and again. Swamiji loves his devotees very much. While Swamiji was going, he sent his blessings to all the devotees. But he did not want them to know very clearly that he is leaving his body forever. Over and above, yogis do not have permission from God to tell others clearly the time of leaving their bodies.

Yoga Nidra

What is yoga nidra?

Swamiji left his body in yoga nidra, not just through mahasamadhi. One hour and forty-eight minutes after going into yoga nidra, Swamiji came in bhava upon a disciple in Agra. Swamiji gave three indications that he is going into yoga nidra. Swamiji put three people into bhava and told them in bhava that you should try to wake me up.[56] The messages said there was a chance that Swamiji can wake from yoga nidra from twenty-four hours to three hundred forty hours if his body will support him. The messages also said that if his body does not support him, then Swamiji blesses all the devotees. My body did not work, so I had to go from yoga nidra into mahasamadhi.

Swamiji will keep coming again and again in the bodies of his various devotees and he will help his devotees always as he has done earlier. Swamiji will give instructions to his various disciples. For some devotees, he will come in bhava. For some he will come in meditation. To others he will come in sleep. If you get instructions about any other disciple, contact that other disciple on telephone or by letter and convey the message to that person. Devotees must exchange notes with each other and must tell their experiences to each other.

A part of Swamiji is in every devotee, in all devotees who are anywhere in the world. Swamiji is in their bodies, in their minds, in their hearts. Swamiji your mind. Swamiji your heart. Swamiji your body. How can you find Swamiji? There is only one way to find Swamiji, through meditation.

Swamiji fought with Lord Shankara and Lord Shankara said, “If your devotees will do good meditation you can again come in power.” Swamiji took permission from Lord Shankara to use his powers and come in bhava through someone else’s body. He can give his love to devotees, he can solve their problems, and he can be with them. Swamiji will come again and again and again in shakti rupa. This is Swamiji’s promise to you. Don’t grieve. That is most important.

Do you love Swami’s body or do you love the power of his blessings? Now listen very carefully. If Swami was not a yogi you would not have loved him so much. You loved Swamiji because he was a yogi. You loved the blessings through his yogic powers. I give you blessings that although I may not be there in my body, I will be with you always and you will always get Swamiji’s powers and messages through him. These are my blessings to you.

Why do you grieve for me? Previously I used to meet you in Bangalore. Now I will meet you in Delhi. Now I will meet you in Agra. Now I will come to your meditation. Now I will come to your dreams. So do not grieve for me.

Don’t grieve for Swamiji’s body. It is because of your love that Swamiji took permission from Lord Shankara to come in power and be with you. It is very unusual for someone to come in shakti rupa or bhava through yoga nidra to help and guide devotees and make his presence known. But it is because of your love that it has happened. It is because of your love that Swamiji got permission from Lord Shankara and he is here. It is very unusual to guide devotees this way after going into mahasamadhi.

All devotees should all feel very happy that after yoga nidra I am coming through bhava. I would not have gotten permission to come into bhava, but I insisted that I have to get into shakti rupa and come through bhava so I can be in contact with my devotees. You all know how much problem Swamiji had with his body and how much he suffered in the last four years. After all, when the body did not support Swamiji, he had to leave it.

During the five days we were having darshan of Swamiji’s body, the messages said pray hard, do good bhajans, do good meditation, then Swamiji can come back. Did that have to do with Swamiji coming back through shakti rupa or bhava samadhi in the manner we are now experiencing?

No. Those people who got the messages wished to have Swamiji back alive in the same body very much. That’s the reason they gave the message like that. They liked Swamiji very much. But even if the devotees didn’t do the prayers, Swamiji would still come and work like this because he had his mission to complete.

If Swamiji had to go into mahasamadhi in yoga nidra, why did he have to go to the hospital and leave his body there? Why didn’t he do it in the ashram?

Swamiji went to the hospital for his treatment. When Swamiji’s body was not supporting him in the hospital, he had to leave it. He had no desire to go into yoga nidra. Swamiji had to go in yoga nidra because his body was not working and was not supporting him. Swamiji had to go into mahasamadhi. If Swamiji had wanted to just leave in mahasamadhi, he would have decided earlier. He would have had the pit dug in front of him and made all the arrangements. Even a hundred years before he could decide the date of his mahasamadhi. But he had no desire to leave through mahasamadhi.

It was like this. In Dehradun, Swamiji’s devotees who were in the military used to come and massage him. They were very strong and massaged hard and deep. Swamiji had to put himself in power otherwise they would make chutney out of him. That time also, Swamiji used to go into yoga nidra and people kept massaging him and he used to enjoy the massage and be comfortable by going into yoga nidra.[57]

Yoga nidra used to relax Swamiji. Even during massage he used to go into yoga nidra. Even during that time sometimes his body was not too well. In the same way, he went into yoga nidra in the hospital. When his conditions did not improve in yoga nidra, he had to go into mahasamadhi.

When a yogi sleeps, is that yoga nidra?

Yes. Even when he was asleep, if anyone came near him, he would know of it. He would know everything that was spoken around him. A yogi never sleeps. He is always conscious. That’s called yoga nidra. Even samadhi, when he has a little consciousness, that is also yoga nidra.

What is the difference between yoga nidra and mahasamadhi?

There is not much difference. When you sleep you die. Swamiji entered yoga nidra with the conviction that if Lord Shankara agrees, he will come back again. He would have told his devotees that he was going for mahasamadhi. Suddenly I left my body in yoga nidra. Otherwise I would have decided a date. I would have informed my devotees and gone into mahasamadhi. No amount of grieving on the part of my devotees could have stopped me from going into mahasamadhi.

If Swamiji is in yoga nidra, then he can come back through bhava samadhi as he is doing now. But if a person passes away through mahasamadhi as the other great beings have done, then they can appear only in dreams or visions. People have to perceive them through their own experiences. But they will not come back through bhava samadhi. This is the difference.

When Swamiji was in dialysis, sometimes he would slumber off, and yet he would understand what was being said. Would he be going into yoga nidra?

No, that is not yoga nidra. Yoga nidra has got nothing to do with the body. It comes through sankalpa.

What’s sankalpa?

The yogi has a lot of power. If the yogi wishes that something should happen, that’s called sankalpa. Whatever he wishes to happen happens.

Why didn’t other yogis like Nityanada wish for this to happen?

The duty that they were assigned was not of such size that they had to do this. They just gave their powers to their devotees and their work continued like that. That is all. They did not come back and do the work like Swamiji is doing.

What is it that is in the body? What is it that leaves the body? It’s the mind with the prana [life force] and the five indriyas [senses]. These are the ones which are in the body. A yogi has full control over these. When he has a sankalpa, when he has an intent, then he can remain. That sankalpa or intent remains and the work will be done towards that end. Nothing has gone. That is yoga nidra. The body has gone but the yoga nidra is there. With than sankalpa he keeps coming and going.

When a normal person dies, the mind dies with the physical body. When a yogi dies the mind remains. When Swamiji’s body was dying, his mind had a sankalpa, a goal. Through that goal or intent, he can keep coming back with the mind and work towards his goal.

Actually speaking, there is no relation between the spirit and the body. Swamiji is always ever present in the spirit. The reason he had to take a physical body is to become familiar to us. That part of the job is over. Now he is again in the form of a spirit. If you do the meditation, you can also develop your spirit and come up. Again and again you should tell yourselves that Swamiji is not the body. He is spirit. You should not be identifying yourselves with the physical body. You should be identifying yourselves with the spirit. If you keep telling yourself this, that should help you.

Is this in any way related to the story of the yogi who was close to being God realized but was thinking of his pet deer when he was dying, so he had to be born again as a deer? Is yoga nidra and sankalpa a similar process, like the thoughts that you carry with you at the moment of death?

No, that’s different. This yogi who had a deer with him and who was looking after it at the last moment, he had a lot of attachment towards the deer. He had the deer in his mind and nothing else. He died while he was looking at the deer. So he had to be born as a deer.

What Swamiji is talking about is the welfare of human beings and the worlds. Swamiji has particular goals to achieve, a great work to be done in this world. So he had a sankalpa, and with that intent in yoga nidra he left the body. He can keep coming back to finish that job and achieve that goal.

Let us say that you have some very definite work to do. Even in your sleep you keep thinking about it. Your mind is always set on that and nothing else. In the same way because Swamiji has this mission, it is there in his mind. It is there in the bhava.

What is the difference between going into mahasamadhi through yoga nidra and through normal consciousness?

Some people come here to be of service to others. Those people go into mahasamadhi through yoga nidra. Others who relate only to themselves go to mahasamadhi normally, without yoga nidra.

Either the person is here to serve others or the person is doing sadhana [spiritual practice] just for his or her own realization. In the second case, the person goes into mahasamadhi the normal way and not into yoga nidra. In the case where people have to help others, they go into yoga nidra and then into mahasamadhi.

Let us say you have to cross a river. You could find some way to cross it yourself, like swimming or taking a boat and rowing. But there are others who take a big ship to cross the river. The advantage of taking a big ship is that you can take a lot of people with you. You are not going just by yourself. You can take a lot of people and anybody can get on or off. It’s not going to make much difference to the ship. Yoga nidra is a like that big ship.

After we take the big boat to the other side, then what?

You will have to come back and take more people over to the other side.

Who had taken yoga nidra before Swamiji?

In ancient times all the saints and rishi munis used to take mahasamadhi in yoga nidra. If we take mahasamadhi in yoga nidra, we yogis can take rebirth, come in bhava, and come in power. We can come with shakti rupa into other people’s bodies and talk to you. If we leave our bodies normally without going into yoga nidra, we cannot come in power into any other person’s body. What is yoga? What is tapas? It is a process. When you leave your body in yoga nidra, only then does this process take place.

Is there any description of yoga nidra in any scripture?

Yes, in the Yoga Vasishtha you will get a detailed description of yoga nidra.

Swamiji, can you kindly name any other yogi who has taken mahasamadhi in yoga nidra?

Krishna has done yoga lila first and then he took samadhi in yoga nidra.

Is there any other yogi at present who can leave his body in yoga nidra?

No, there is no yogi at present in the world who can leave his body in mahasamadhi and come back again in shakti rupa and work for his devotees.

Was it Swamiji’s desire to leave this world?

No, Swamiji did not want to go to yoga nidra. Swamiji wanted to remain and be with his devotees. But Shankara Bhagavan does not want so. You will come to know why Swamiji wants to remain with you on this earth. You will come to know in 2002.

Swamiji said he will be with you for forty years, so Swamiji will work in shakti rupa with you for forty years. After that, Swamiji in such form may disappear. Do not grieve for Swamiji’s body. There is no point grieving for Swamiji’s body. You will find Swamiji in shakti in some way.

When twenty-five or thirty of you came from Agra, or thirty or forty of you came from Jhansi, or you came from Delhi to visit Swamiji in Bangalore, and then when you left the ashram, don’t you think Swamiji felt sad? Swamiji also feels very sad about leaving his devotees. What is the wealth of Swamiji? Swamiji’s assets are his devotees whom he loves very dearly. Swamiji’s wealth lies only in his devotees. Swamiji’s only assets are his devotees. If people know me, the reason I am renowned, my glory and everything about me are all only because of my devotees.

Shakti Rupa

Is it true that God protects yogis from being too well known by the general public?

Yes, that’s true.

Is that to protect them from being around too many people?

There are many other reasons. There are more doubts and problems while the yogi is in his body. See what happened while Swamiji was in India? All the Brahmins rejected him because he was not a Brahmin. It’s politics. Now they won’t be able to do it.

So as long as the yogi is in the body, people confuse the yogi with the body?

Many people think like that.

Is that the major reason why God seems to protect yogis with privacy?

Yes.

That’s where I see Swamiji’s mission so special because his mission in the body was so public and unusual.

Yes. The difference between Swamiji and the other yogis is that the other yogis would work only through their devotees. Whereas Swamiji is doing the work by himself.

Through shakti rupa or bhava samadhi?

In the bhava samadhi, in the mind, in the meditation.

The mind would include our dreams?

No, intuition. You develop intuition. You are getting good ideas. That’s how it works.

When other yogis work through devotees, as opposed to Swamiji working directly, would that be a situation where the devotee becomes God realized and they also become a guru?

No only if those devotees have the wish to become God realized and if they do practice would they become Self realized. Otherwise no. In other cases the yogi would give his powers to the devotees. With that power the devotee would go and do the work. But now Swamiji is not doing that. He is doing the work by himself.

Will that change over time?

As long as the devotees believe in this, there won’t be any problem. He will continue like this.

At one time, Swamiji said forty years. The implication was some change at the end of forty years.

Within a decade everyone in the world is going to do meditation. It’s going to happen. There is going to be a lot of change. You will have to do more work. Over the next ten years the population will reduce a lot. Those who stay alive, they will be really happy.

If you do the meditation you will understand. If you are really willing to know what is going to happen over the next ten years, and if you wish to see that in the meditation, then while you are meditating, if you aim for that, then you’ll get it. If those visions come to you, then you will be afraid.

So it’s not necessarily good to know ahead of time?

It’s of no use.

Sometimes Swamiji suggests that how long he is going to continue to come in this manner depends upon whether we continue to receive him.

That’s true.

Is it as simple as if we don’t care, why should he bother?

There is a relation between the guru and the devotees. All the devotees come to the guru. They might come in this birth, or if they don’t come in this birth they will come in the next birth. Everyone will come. This is the time many people will come to the guru. All the people will come.

It seems unusual in history for a yogi to be working in this manner, using shakti rupa and bhava samadhi so much. Is this just a matter of God’s instructions for Shivabalayogi or that in prior times people didn’t believe in it?

No, the Guru didn’t instruct Swamiji about the methods. All that he told Swamiji was that he’ll have to put a lot of people into the line of meditation. That’s all the Guru wanted. Swamiji has chosen this particular method.

I don’t know of any yogi in history like Shivabalayogi who has been working through bhava samadhi. Is that another way of saying the dangers we are seeing in the world today are unique to known history?

That’s true.

So the nadis are correct. Such an evil alignment of the planets as now has not occurred since Kurukshetra?[58]

That’s true.

Does Swamiji use the word shakti rupa for when he comes in bhava upon certain people so they have his full powers?

Both are the same, whether you say bhava samadhi or shakti rupa.

Is Swamiji coming through bhava a varying thing or is it the same, consistent all the way through until he leaves? Is there a deepening or lessening going on?

It depends upon Swamiji’s wish.

Is the person who receives Swamiji’s shakti rupa getting increasingly purified through Swamiji’s bhava?

Yes. The desire in the mind vanishes. The instability of the mind, even that disappears. Whether there is sorrow or happiness, the mind remains still and unaffected. Whether they are criticized or praised, it does not affect them.

What’s the difference between just having a meditation and bhajan program versus having Swamiji obvious to us in shakti rupa? What’s the difference for us?

You will get more of Swamiji’s powers and more people will get bhava. More people will be benefited.

Is there a difference with shakti rupa on different people?

There is no difference in power or the bhava samadhi. But the purpose for which Swamiji comes in bhava samadhi on different people will be different, that is all.

Swamiji’s shakti rupa on different people seems very different.

That’s the external difference that you see, that is all. One fellow has got a big beard and this fellow doesn’t.

But Swamiji upon the other person is much more active and outward going.

If you want it, even he will do that now.

What would account for the difference? What is the difference in purpose?

We had a problem at an ashram and M. P. Singh was sent to solve the problem. That’s a purpose. Now R. B. Singh is being sent to the U.S.A. on this tour. This purpose is different.

But it still does not account for why there seems to be such a difference in personality. They seem to be different in how they present themselves and I don’t understand why there is a difference.

The bodies are different and their minds are also different. That is the reason you find the difference.

So Swamiji must work with the bodies and the minds of the individuals.

Yes.

Does that mean they are limiting?

No, for whatever purpose he comes, he will achieve that. There is no limit. There is no limit being put by the minds of these individuals or their physical bodies. The purpose for which I have come in bhava samadhi on that person, I will achieve that goal irrespective of his mind or physical body. Whatever Swamiji desires will take place.

In bhava samadhi, does Swamiji retain all of his memories of all of his devotees?

If it is necessary, then he can remember everything.

Necessary for the devotee or for Swamiji?

He is now coming here for the welfare of the people. If for the welfare of the people it is necessary that he has to remember what Shivabalayogi has known, then he will have to remember. It comes automatically.

Some of Swamiji’s mind must have remained because if mind consists of thoughts, Swamiji still has his memories of what happened when he was in the body. Is that unique to a yogi?

His work is spiritual. It is through the spirit. As such thoughts come to your mind, you are thinking whether it is the mind of Swamiji. But all the time it is his spirit working and working. For normal human beings, the spirit is different than the mind and the mind is again different from the body. But with Swamiji it’s all the same. Spirit, mind and body are all the same. This is how it has to be explained to you.

Swamiji, with all respect, I wish to ask some questions about the person upon whom you are now coming in shakti rupa. You are that person and you are Swamiji . . .

No, I am not this fellow and Swamiji. This is the shakti rupa of Swamiji in that man. Once the energy form of Swamiji has gone, this person will become himself. As long as Swamiji’s power is in this man’s body, you pay regards to him as Swamiji. When the power goes, you treat him like the ordinary man he is. There is no problem. There is no serious implication in this.

Where is the problem? Today this fellow can have Swamiji’s shakti rupa. Tomorrow another devotee can have the power. You can go to your places -- Jhansi, Agra, Delhi, Jaipur -- and many people can receive Swamiji’s shakti rupa and you can seek your answers from them. If you think that you are now talking to this fellow, your mind will be disturbed unnecessarily. If you think you are talking with Swamiji, you will feel better.

Why do you bother about which power, what power, or how much power is there? Now this gas lamp is burning. You should be concerned that the gas lamp is burning and giving light. You should not be bothered about how the gas is burning, whether it is LPG or some other gas, or which company it came from. You should be concerned only about the light. If you are getting light, you should not bother about minor things.

Where is the problem? You asked a question and you got the answer. Swamiji might be in shakti rupa upon this fellow today, or tomorrow some other devotee gets power and you ask him a question and he gives an answer. Why should you bother who is giving the answer? You should only be bothered about the answer to your question. Your problems are being solved. You should not worry about these things. If you are only worried and thinking that this chap is so-and-so person, then you will not get anything.

This power is very great. When Swamiji’s shakti rupa comes upon a person, there is no relationship for that person, whether son, father, wife, or any other relationship. Feel happy that Swamiji is with you in shakti rupa. Whatever problems you have, whatever confusion you may have, Swamiji is sorting them out. That is more important than anything else. Yogis even in their own lifetime can go to two hundred bodies in bhava.

Swamiji, how would we come to know about those two hundred bodies?

There is no need for two hundred bodies. Just a few, like six or seven bodies are enough for Swami. You need not know about them. What is the requirement for you to know about them?

Swamiji has given powers to some people to initiate others into meditation. What powers has he given to this man upon whom Swamiji is in shakti rupa? Is there any difference between the two powers?

He has given the same powers to everybody. The only difference is who has obeyed Swamiji and how much and how implicitly. Tomorrow if I say to any one of you that you are not going to sleep with your wife, you are not going to play with your children, you are not going to eat food, and you are going to sit in the sun, it is all the guru’s will. The guru examines his devotees in many different ways. If a devotee passes the guru’s exam in the guru’s judgment, only then he gets more results. He gets more powers. Then he gets more fruits.

Swamiji will put his shakti rupa in his devotees. Whoever wants to ask questions can ask questions. You must have seen earlier in various ashrams, including Bangalore, that Swamiji delegated his power to different people, sometimes to a lady, sometimes to a man, and solved devotees’ problems. When Swamiji puts anyone in bhava, he delegates his power to that person. When that person touches another person, he delegates some of that power to cure and bless that other person. If Swamiji so desires, he can come in bhava and speak or he can even write. This is known by his devotees all over the ashrams.

You are going to ask, “Everyone is not getting bhava like this fellow.” You fight with Swamiji. “Swamiji, we don’t get bhava. You give bhava to so-and-so person. You don’t give bhava to us.” You keep fighting with me. Sometimes devotees complain that Swamiji favors one. You also question me again and again why I have not nominated any successor. I am a yogi. A yogi never nominates a successor. There is no successor to Swamiji. The trust work goes on. It is not a mutt.[59] If someone does tapas like Swamiji, they can be a successor. Swamiji is still doing his work. The proof is that we can still talk with Swamiji, ask questions, and get his answers. Swamiji’s disciples upon whom Swamiji comes in shakti rupa, they have got Swamiji’s full powers. That is the power of bhava. Don’t make up all these controversies.

Swamiji desires that all of you should take Swamiji’s mission forward. Swamiji wants to bless all his devotees. Swamiji’s devotees should not get unnecessarily confused and leave the path of righteousness.

Your Swami is a yogi. You should not grieve for him. You should feel happy that he is giving powers to you. You should rejoice. You should not grieve for him. If you grieve for him, his powers will become lesser and he will feel sad about it. If you meditate more and more, as much more you meditate you will get more and more powers. God is faith. Faith is God. If you do not have faith in the yogi, then you make the yogi like any other human being, like a stone. God is nothing to you if you do not have faith in God. Don’t grieve for Swami. Your guru Shivabalayogi is with you.

Previously the antennae of your mind were directed only towards Bangalore.[60] Now Swamiji is in full power in many places so you can put out your antennae anywhere. Whoever wants to catch it can catch it.

There are many bhava Swamis and they are saying different things.

How can that be? Swami is one only and he comes with a purpose. So up to that extent, people should listen and no more than that. People should not go on questioning Swami every time he comes. He has got some purpose and due importance should be given for that purpose and the purpose should be heard properly. If all the people do the meditation as instructed by Swamiji, there will be no need for Swamiji to come on anyone, or for anyone to ask for the qualifications of the bhava Swamis.

Over the years I have been involved with trance mediums and I have observed that they filter the information or spirit coming through them. So I am uncomfortable with the trance phenomenon. I have always relied on meditation.

There is a way to deal with your doubt. You will know about bhava if you meditate. And if you meditate, you will not need to come to someone in bhava. Everything will come to you in meditation.

Swamiji, whatever conflict I have in my mind I want solved in my own dream or meditation, not through someone else’s bhava.

Do not worry. It will happen. Whatever doubt comes in your mind during meditation or dreams or otherwise, write it down. Read it and think on the question. Slowly, slowly, automatically you will get answers in your meditation. Keep writing your doubts on paper. When you are not doing meditation, think over it. Any questions can be held in mind during meditation and Swamiji will provide answers. It is important to trust your feelings and impressions in this area. You will get your answer.

How will we know?

All impressions will be from him. Have no doubt.

You must clear your doubts because if your doubts are not cleared you will not feel satisfied. When Swamiji was in body you could not ask many questions sometimes because you were very concerned that Swamiji’s body is not well. “Why bother him? He is tired.” So you kept your questions to yourself. But now, whenever somebody has Swamiji’s shakti rupa, you must ask your questions again and again until you are satisfied.

Bhava Samadhi

Is there an explanation why Swamiji is using so much bhava samadhi when other yogis don’t seem to have used it?

This way it is faster and a lot more people will do meditation in a shorter time. That is the reason he chose this way. Anybody can be put into bhava. It doesn’t matter if the person is clean [good in heart] or not. Swamiji can put anybody in bhava, and he can reach a lot more people through this method. It is like receiving a shock when an electric current is passed through you. Whenever this happens, the person receives a shock. So gradually the person leaves all his or her bad habits. The person becomes pure. When a good person gets the bhava, he enjoys it. He gets bliss. When a bad person gets it, he suffers. When he suffers again and again, he loses the bad habits. He has to leave the bad habits.

What if the person does not give up the bad habits?

The suffering will increase.

Does this have anything to do with how bhava appears to others?

Yes, you can observe it from outside. Others can observe it and they feel it a lot. Some people have some bad habits that Swamiji doesn’t like. They will have this.

The difficult bhava, can that be transmitted to other people who are close to that person?

Swamiji will take care of it.

If it’s such a good method, why has it not been used very much in history?

There are so many people here. Can you all go to court as lawyers?

Well, that’s telling me that Swamiji has the training, and the tapas, and the powers that God gave him through that tapas that allow him to do this.

Yes, he has the powers.

Is it true the more “bad” bhava anybody gets the purer that person becomes?

The bhava is not good and bad. The bhava is the same. But when the same bhava goes near a good person, they enjoy it. They like it and they have bliss. The same bhava when it goes near a bad person, that person will suffer or has to leave their bad habits. That happens automatically.

The Dalai Lama has his oracle, an individual who gets the bhava regularly on particular festivals and tells the Tibetan Buddhists what they need to do. It appears from what I’ve read of it and people that I know who have witnessed it that it’s like bhava samadhi. Is it?

That is the subtle body of Buddha which enters into that person through the bhava.

Is the human condition now fallen and we’re just starting to start up that tradition again?

Yes, that’s a continuous cycle.

Is there anything Swamiji can tell us about how we can best present bhava samadhi to the people at meditation and bhajan programs?

The way you have to explain it is now Swamiji has the mental body. It’s the mental body which comes and does the work and then leaves.

The Need to Meditate

If you do good meditation then what happens?

We develop spiritually? We come to know?

Swamiji doesn’t agree with you. You all know the answer.

We do? We will realize God?

No, the final aim is to lose body consciousness and gain spiritual consciousness. That’s the aim. If you get spiritual consciousness, is there any pain? That’s how you should be. If you do good meditation you will get spiritual consciousness. Once you get more and more of that then you will have more and more happiness. You need not have doubts, but it will not come in a day.

If you do good meditation, both the body and the mind become lighter and you will get a lot of bliss in the meditation. If you continue to do the meditation well, then you get a lot of good experiences. You can see light. You can see different lands. You can see the Sun, the stars, and different planets. Whatever beautiful visions are available for your eyes outside, much more beautiful visions are available inside in meditation. There is no practice better than meditation. Meditation is the best.

Where is the mind? Is it inside or outside?

Stuck in the body, I’m afraid. That’s like asking where do thoughts come from. I don’t know where thoughts come from.

What is mind?

A big bucket full of thoughts?

That is right. That has to be reduced. In meditation that reduces. All the attachment vanishes. Nothing else is required. All this talk is not necessary. Even this is mind.

Why in meditation do I get a sensation of losing consciousness of my legs?

What is your form? While you’re doing the meditation, what is your form? The body is like a house. Some times you come into the house and stay there. Some times you go out. It should be like that. There should be times when you go out. There should be times when you are at home.

You should lose body consciousness. You should not identify yourself with the physical body. You should start identifying yourself with the Self. That is Self consciousness. From physical body consciousness you should go to the Self consciousness, spiritual consciousness. To achieve that, you will require Swamiji’s help a number of times. Swamiji will have to come and give you help. Then you will lose body consciousness and attain Self consciousness. Then you will let go of all kinds of feelings like anger and fear. You will remain steady in a great bliss all the time. All that happens automatically if you just focus on that point, the bhrikuti.

Even if we attain Self realization in this life, Swamiji incarnates again and because of our soul connection with the guru, we’re back with him. We would have to do it all over again. Why should I be fighting so hard to get out of this world if I am going to be back here anyway? Shouldn’t we be making the most of being in this world?

Four people come and forcibly take you to the sea and immerse you. This is one thing. The other is that by yourself, you willingly go to the sea and have a bath. What’s the difference between the two?

The first one you won’t enjoy very much. The second one you will.

Similarly, when you attain siddhi then it will be up to you whether you want to be in the body or elsewhere. You will do it willingly.

So even if my guru reincarnates I have a choice whether to follow?

Yes, you have the freedom, but once you see the guru incarnating you will want to come down.

Swamiji has said that whenever he takes birth, his devotees take birth. If after forty years Swamiji will not take birth, then what will happen to us?

When Swamiji’s devotees take birth, a small part of Swamiji comes with them. That is the rebirth of Swamiji again.

The only important thing for you is to do meditation. Do meditation very well. You will get instructions. Swamiji will come in shakti rupa. Swamiji promises that all devotees will know. You will come to know in your meditation, in your dreams, and through the light body form. If you do meditation seriously, then sometimes you might feel that Swamiji is not there, but Swamiji is there. You will get the feeling of Swamiji’s presence. All of you should try to meditate more seriously.

You may have many thoughts and questions and you will seek answers. You will get your answers in meditation or sometimes your answers will come through other devotees. Swamiji’s devotees live far apart. If Swamiji comes in your meditation and gives instructions for another devotee, write to that person. Previously you used to write to Bangalore to get answers from Swamiji. Now part of Swamiji is in every devotee’s body. All devotees should keep in touch with one another.

You all have been neglecting your meditation. You have not been giving proper time to meditation. You will do it for two hours and think you have done enough. This is not the way. Swamiji has gone into space and you must do meditation more seriously. You have neglected your meditation a lot. It doesn’t matter. But in the future you all should do your meditation very carefully. You may not be able to see Swamiji but he is with you.

Swamiji is in space and he will be with you when you start meditating at a fixed time. You have to fix a time of day for meditation. You can chose any time for your meditation. Housewives might chose ten or twelve o’clock because they have to fulfill their household duties of looking after the children, husband, food and the like. But whatever time you decide upon, you should adhere to it a hundred percent because you will get Swamiji’s powers at those fixed times. If all devotees will meditate at a fixed time, then all of them will get connected mentally with each other.

Do not change the time you have chosen. Let’s say you do your meditation at seven and a guest comes at that time. You should not postpone your meditation to eight. You should tell your guest, “Sit down. It is an order from my guru that I should do meditation at this time.” Then do your meditation. Do not change your timings.

Try hard to do meditation at the time upon which you have decided. Sometimes you can not avoid some guest coming or you are traveling or there is some function and you can not do meditation at the fixed time. At least find five minutes, sit somewhere and pray to Swamiji. Remember him and pray to him. Remembering Swamiji is important. Whatever blessings are coming to you will continue to receive. If you remember Swamiji even for two minutes during a party, the blessings which you get from Swamiji will continue. So do it.

Don’t weep for Swamiji’s body. Don’t grieve for Swamiji. If you grieve, Swamiji feels sad about it. I am in shakti rupa. If you grieve, I feel sad about it. Swamiji is in your body. Swamiji is in your heart. Swamiji is in your mind. Don’t grieve for him. Previously Swamiji was in front of you in a physical body. Now Swamiji is in front of you and in the air. You can not see him but he is with you. If you remember Swamiji you will find him. Whenever you remember Swamiji you will find him. You will find him in meditation. If not in meditation, you will find him in bhava. He will say, “Do not be troubled.”

When Swamiji was in the physical body, it was easy to approach him. Whenever you remembered him, he could come into your meditation or your bhava. But now as he has gone into space, things are slightly different. I will still come into your meditation. I will still come into your bhava. But things are a little different. But do not grieve for my body. It gave me a lot of pain and sadness.

Swamiji has not left you. Just like he used to come over devotees in bhava in the past, he will continue to do so and give us instructions from time to time. Just like you are having a meeting now and Swamiji is here, in the same way Swamiji will come and give guidance. Before when you meditated for one hour, or three hours, or whatever time, you would get a certain amount of power from Swamiji. Now the same time in meditation you will get many times more power. Swamiji is much more powerful now without the body. Swamiji is not dead. You will find him more present in your meditation.

Sri Swamiji’s Continued Presence

Swamiji’s devotees think that he will protect us and he will inspire us throughout our lives. Will we devotees ever feel his presence in the body?

Swamiji will tell you many ways in which you can feel his presence. You are sitting, sleeping or walking around and you feel a very strong fragrance. You might be roaming around on a lawn or through grass or something. Suddenly there is a fragrance. You may wonder how such a fragrance is coming. It is the blessing of your Swami. You should feel that your Swamiji is somewhere near you. He is in space somewhere near your body.

You are going somewhere and suddenly you find there are lots and lots of lights. You should know that your Swami is passing that way.

A third way is if some unknown person comes to you and says something like “Hello. How are you? I hope everything is fine,” and you are blessed. That person may be Swami.

Fourth, you are sleeping and suddenly you hear a knock on the door or footsteps on the floor, or a little voice here or there. Maybe your Swamiji is walking around in your house.

Swamiji, what if thieves are walking in the house?

When Swami comes you feel happy. You feel joyous. You may not get up. But when thieves come, you will get fear. But even if you mistake thieves for Swamiji, it is a good thing because you will get up and you will be saved.

The fifth way Swamiji may come physically is this. You are sitting in meditation and you are in deep meditation. Suddenly you feel pain in some part of your body. Don’t get upset over that. Swamiji does this once in a while to his devotees. Swamiji does this to bless his devotees when the devotees have some physical ailment or problem.

You grieve more than required. You should not do that. You are a woman and you are the form of power. Even my mother used to say that all ladies are the form of Shakti.[61] So much power is in you women. If you grieve, how will Swamiji sit comfortably and do his work? All my sisters are my power. All my brothers are my power. All my devotees are my power. Swamiji’s wealth is this.

You should listen to this. You think that Swamiji left his mission unfinished. Don’t grieve over that. If you obey Swamiji’s order, Swamiji’s power will never finish. If you will not obey Swamiji, Swamiji’s power will reduce. You should obey the instructions your guru gives you in your meditation. You should pay special heed to this. Do your meditation in peace. Do good work for other people also.

Don’t grieve. Swamiji has taken mahasamadhi. Why should he come back to you at all? Only his love for you. Swamiji is with you like a shadow. Swamiji was with you like a shadow. Swamiji will be with you like a shadow always and ever. Do your meditation regularly. Look after the other devotees of Swamiji. Serve them well.

The Mission

Were the heavens pleased to have Swamiji back? Or is that a silly question? He was always there.

Yes. Now all the siddha purushas in all the worlds are happy that they can have Swamiji, and they all will be watching what Swamiji is going to do.

What is he going to do?

What is he doing now?

He is sitting in shakti rupa.

What did the devotees do here?

Sing bhajans and enjoy Swamiji’s presence.

They are also doing the meditation. This is the work Swamiji is talking about.

Swamiji must be working in so many different ways. There are so many different traditions, so many blessings, whether through Jesus, Mohammed or Buddha or so many other traditions. So what we’re seeing here as Shivabalayogi is probably only a fraction of what he is doing in the world.

Yes. They are now forms of Shivabalayogi. So in the form of Shivabalayogi they watch what Shivabalayogi is doing.

What Shivabalayogi is now doing, to what extent is that upon the instructions of his Guru?

There is no difference between Guru and shishya [disciple]. Shiva and Shivabalayogi are not different. If you are doing good meditation, then you will understand. If you do good meditation, you can see Shivabalayogi, you can see Shiva, and you can see both together, and then you will understand. They both will become the same.

It seems to me that the success of Swamiji’s mission depends upon whether his devotees respond and do the work.

The devotees will do it. It is now their duty. Swamiji’s duty is now over. Now it is the duty of the devotees. Whatever help they require, Swamiji will be giving it.

Is there a chance the devotees will fail?

No. You should not get doubts. Swamiji will see to it.

Are we all one with the yogi?

Yes. All the devotees put together are Shivabalayogi. Talking about Swamiji’s work and the devotees’ work is not really right. It’s the same. In regular practice we will have to keep using regular terms like this is Swamiji’s work and that is the devotees’ work. But when it comes to the real spirit of it, they are the same. There’s no real difference between the devotees’ work and Swamiji’s work.

What should Swamiji’s ashrams be doing?

First start the meditation classes. Then start other things. Meditation classes are the most important. Second is kirtan. Third is prashad. Nobody should go hungry from the ashram. Whoever comes to the ashram should be offered a glass of water. If there is no food prepared, at least some fruit, sweets or dry food should be given. It should be noted that this is the wish and desire of Swamiji.

Do not get too involved in rituals, fasts, and other things. You should be concerned mostly about meditation. When you get power in meditation, you will get such blessings that only you can know. A devotee who does bhakti, who takes part in kirtan and bhajans, and who gets power, what blessings they get only that person can know.

Swamiji insists on one point in ashrams. There must be respect for women and all others as well. Conduct in the ashram should be perfect. The dignity of the place should be maintained. If the dignity is not maintained, nobody will come.

All those residing at an ashram must sit for dhyan every morning for thirty minutes. If they do not meditate, how will others be able to follow them or be asked or persuaded by them? All people in the ashram, including the children, must sit for dhyan. All the devotees have to perform more meditation, more bhajan and more seva.

Now all ashrams will start developing. Each ashram will develop in its own way. The whole mission will be like the glow of the sun. More and very big work is ahead of you. Henceforth Swamiji’s mission will become very big. What has been done while Swamiji was in his physical body is nothing compared to what is going to be done now. You will only understand the size of the mission in the future. Whoever helps in the spreading of the mission in this country and abroad will be blessed by it. You will all be instruments to do my work. The mission will be far greater than what you have seen. I left the body because it was in bad shape. Having left it allows me to work faster. I have not left. I will continue to come to you in bhava.

In next forty years statues of Swamiji will be installed over the whole world. In India the beginning will be at the Guntur ashram. An idol three feet in height, either in dhyana mudra [Swamiji meditating] or left hand mudra [Swamiji’s left hand raised in a blessing] has to be made. Second will be the Hyderabad ashram and it should become a world-wide phenomenon.

What will happen in America?

You will develop a lot in America. Dhyana meditation and this mission will come up a lot in America. A lot of people will start doing meditation. People are apprehensive and are not sure whether they should push ahead with meditation and the mission. The Trust must support new centers to help them develop. Devotees should work together. You will have to support them. You will have to keep writing to them saying that, “Come on, you will have to bring it up. You will have to push it forward.” Once you get it ingrained into them, a lot of people will start doing meditation.

Swamiji is going to give a lot of bhava in the U.S. However, people there don’t yet understand what is bhava. If he gives bhava to the people there now, they will put the people that get bhava into the mental hospitals. You have seen bhava and you have recorded bhava in video and pictures. You should go and show them to the people there. They will get educated about bhava. They will come to know what is bhava. Then bhava can be given to the people there. Once you understand the value of bhava, then it will start developing. A lot of people will come and ask for bhava in the U.S. Swamiji will give lots of bhava in America to those who ask for it. It will start slowly because it is so new, then it will gain momentum. There will be a lot of demand for bhava.

Even in the United States you will get a lot of people who will get bhava and start speaking. Swamiji will be speaking through many people, but not immediately. It will take some more time.

Can we expect a lot of bhava samadhi in the United States?

If Swamiji gives a lot of bhava all of a sudden, that might create fear. It will come in gradually.

Hereafter each devotee is required to do more meditation, more bhajans, and more works. You will have to work much harder.

We will have to work harder in what way?

You’ll have to organize programs. You’ll have to initiate new people. Programs can be arranged for initiation for meditation with wide publicity in the media. If you feel it’s required you can prepare small booklets on the technique of meditation. You can make a leaflet describing the technique of meditation. Swamiji’s instructions must be copied and preserved. They are to be published in newsletter. After the mahasamadhi, whatever small details have happened should be recorded, whether in Anantapur, Hyderabad, Bhuwaneshwar, Hindupur, Doddaballapur, America, England, Italy, Australia, or Singapore. All details of all events that happen should be recorded. Swamiji’s blessings will manifest in various ways. Collect the events and the news weekly or fortnightly or monthly and publish them.

Jata Samadhi

Sri Swamiji has two Samadhis. One is located in Adivarapupeta where his holy body is interred. Another is in the Bangalore ashram where Swamiji instructed his devotees to consecrate a second Samadhi by burying small pieces of his jata (matted hair) and other specified personal effects. In October of 1994, Sri Swamiji offered to make a jata samadhi available to devotees elsewhere in the world. Sri Swamiji’s instructions were as follows:

Ask the U.S.A. devotees whether they would like to have a jata samadhi. Many of the devotees have the desire to have a jata samadhi so they can communicate better with Swamiji. If their willingness is there, then arrangements can be made to take the required quantity of jata. They will have to tell the location or locations to be finalized by Swamiji there.

My idea of a jata samadhi is like the Bangalore ashram where a piece of Swamiji’s jata and some personal effects are buried and covered with a slab. Over that would be installed a statue of Swamiji. Is that correct?

Yes.

What ceremony or puja would need to be done once the jata samadhi has been consecrated?

On the mahasamadhi day, you can have meditation there, distribute prashad, and give a mass feeding. That’s all that is required. Daily puja is not required. Once the statue of Swamiji is installed, you can do the puja to that.

If there were a jata samadhi here, would it be as beneficial for people to come to that, or would it be better to travel to Swamiji’s Samadhi in Adivarapupeta?

It’s the same. Once you have a jata samadhi, you will have a lot of power there. There should be room for people to sit and do the meditation. The desires of those who go there will be fulfilled. You can get a lot of power and many blessings from that. Once you have a jata samadhi, many people will get the desire to be near and you will have many people coming over.

Swamiji once said there would be statues of Swamiji around the world. Will they be consecrated in the sense that each will have Swamiji’s subtle body?

Yes. Swamiji would come in bhava and do the pranaprathistha.[62]

Should we not then be making offerings daily to Swamiji’s statue?

Yes, you have to do it. For the jata samadhi it’s not required, but for the idol it would be required.

When Swamiji consecrates idols, he puts power into the them so that when people come they can share in that power and receive blessings, peace and guidance. A newly made idol is just an idol. It has no power until it is consecrated. So when Swamiji consecrates a statue of Hanuman, for example, then the subtle body of Hanuman needs to be put into that. Only then will the idol get power.

Do deities lose power?

Once the pranaprathistha is done, then regular worship has to be continued. The naivdem [food offering] has to be performed every day regularly. If that is not done, then the idol would lose power. Also, the idol loses power when bad people come. When a place for worship is used for a very bad purpose, like harboring terrorists, then that place will lose its power totally. The power goes back to the god. If the subtle body of Hanuman had been installed, then the subtle body would return back to Hanuman. The only way the idol can get back its power is for a yogi to consecrate it again. Whenever Swamiji used to go to a temple and if the power in its idol was diminished, he would act as an instrument to distribute the power from the god to the idol. Even among the idols of Shiva there is less and more power.

The Meditation

The meditation technique Swamiji teaches is the most powerful. No other technique is like it. No other technique will give such peace and blessings. The power comes from Swamiji’s tapas shakti.

In what way should we describe Swamiji’s meditation as better than others?

What you get from Swamiji is very valuable meditation. People do not get this meditation even after many births. They want the meditation and they try to seek it out by going to different gurus and different ashrams. They spend a lot of time there, then realize that what they got is not really useful. By the time they come to that realization their lifetime is spent. So they are born again and again and they have to start seeking it in each birth. They want to find the place where they can do really good meditation.

Instead, Swamiji is giving it out quite freely. It is free in the sense that anybody who comes and asks for it gets it, whether he is worthy of it, whether she does it or not, whatever the matter. He just gives the meditation freely.

This is not what Shiva told Swamiji to do. The way Shiva told him is “You have to test them. You will have to check them whether they are going to do it or not. Only then you should initiate them and give them the meditation.” But Swamiji said, “No. Let me try it. Let me just give it to anybody and we’ll see what happens.” Swamiji has broken the rule that Shiva had given him and he went ahead and gives it to all. Whatever limits Shiva has put on Swamiji, he has broken all the rules. But it is for the good of the people, the good of the world. For their sake he broke those rules that Shiva had put on him and went ahead and gave meditation to all. It’s for the good of the people. Otherwise they wouldn’t get this chance.

Has this meditation technique which Swamiji gives been given previously? Is it an ancient technique or is the first time it has been given through Swamiji?

Since the ancient times, a lot of people have talked about concentrating at this point, the bhrikuti, and doing the meditation. This is a new technique that Shiva has taught which is concentrating the mind and sight at this point, at the bhrikuti. This technique which Shiva taught Swamiji is new.

Swamiji used to say the technique Swamiji was taught is the same technique which all yogis used to attain God realization.

The point of concentration is the same, only the technique different. It is called the ajnya chakra, and it is very easy to meditate on that chakra. But the technique taught by Shiva is new.

Swamiji, what about new devotees, those who become your devotees now?

Things will be the same with old devotees or new devotees. They will also get power like you.

Are there any other yogis now who have done tapas and who are doing the same work, in the sense that meditation is their mission?

No other yogi who is alive. Among those who teach different types of meditation, there is no yogi who teaches the same kind of meditation as Swamiji. All the people working in different types of meditation also will have to work more now. In the other types of meditation, ninety percent of the work would be that of the individual. Five percent would be the help of the guru. With Swamiji’s type of meditation, ninety percent help would be from the guru and five percent from the individual.

Swamiji once said that over half the people in this county were devotees of his in one life time or another. All of those people will now come into a relationship with Shivabalayogi or will it be with another incarnation he will take?

No, they will all come to the line of meditation. All the things that you are talking about, half the people, they will all come into the line of meditation. At the end, Swamiji will help them. They will reach a stage of doing very good meditation but they won’t attain Self realization. To give them that, Swamiji will come. Although they are doing good meditation, they will all get Self realization with the help of Swamiji.

In this life time?

It depends upon the amount of practice and how intense is their wish for Self realization.

Is the physical initiation necessary for Swamiji to be able to help them attain Self realization?

It is not required for those who meditate. They will automatically receive it. The new people, if they are initiated, it will be good for them. They can develop faster.

World Conditions & the Kalki Avatar

Mass feeding at the Bangalore ashram. Sri Swamiji would never let anyone leave his presence without giving them some prashad, blessed food. Many thousands are fed on special functions such as his birthday and his tapas anniversary.

Sri Swamiji in Seattle, U.S.A., in 1989.

Sri Swamiji and a surprise birthday party for a devotee at the airport before Swamiji leaves Seattle, 1990.

Swamiji, I want you to be happy always.

That it is up to the devotees. If you fight each other, he will not be happy. If everyone realizes that they are working with each other for the Trust, the ashram and the world, then he will be happy. All of you should be cautious. I don’t mean just for a few days. You should be cautious forever.

Very critical periods are approaching very soon and during the third war people will want to call Swamiji day and night for directions. Swami will stay in shakti rupa for days at a time and help will be rendered globally. You will find Swamiji in shakti rupa in some way.

Kalki Avatar will come in power when Swamiji gives him power. You all will have his darshan. Swamiji will make sure. Kalki Avatar has been born and will become known after Swamiji gives him power. He will come in due course of time.

Will Swamiji be coming back in a body soon? We’ve heard stories.

Do you want that? Is it necessary for you?

Selfishly yes, but I can understand where a higher evolved being would not want to.

You are going to have Swamiji in a lot of people. Even if you want Swamiji to be on you, then he will be on you. He will come in bhava upon you if you want it. That’s possible. He can be on so many people. Why should he take another body?

I have heard that some people in Swamiji’s bhava have said that Swamiji will be reborn or has already been reborn and is a fourteen year old boy. Maybe these are references to shakti rupa or Swamiji coming through bhava.

The Kalki Avatar is getting ready and very soon he will come out into the world. Then Swamiji’s powers will be given to him. That’s what was meant. It’s not that Swamiji will take a new body. There’s no birth for him again. Shivabalayogi will not incarnate again.

After Swami gives his power to the Kalki Avatar, what becomes of Swamiji?

After he has given that boy the powers, Shivabalayogi also will remain. Do you know how much power Swamiji has? It’s not like the normal power. There’s no limit to this. It’s spiritual power. Even though an amount of power has been given to some person, this doesn’t reduce. It still stays as much. It is an ocean. You can draw as much as you want without diminishing the power.

If Swamiji gives his powers to the Kalki Avatar, will the Kalki Avatar have Swamiji’s memories?

If you speak to him, then he can remember everything.

When?

You will have to wait for some more time. There will be a lot of civil unrest. When that becomes too much then the Kalki Avatar will come out.

Where is the Kalki Avatar?

Kalki Avatar is living in a place near a jungle, but I will not tell where he is. There is a treasure, why should I tell you where it is? Find the treasure yourself.

When all of you will do deep meditation, you all will find Kalki Avatar. If you do meditation you will know not only about Kalki Avatar. You will come to know how is Swamiji, how things are going on in the world, whether Kalki Avatar will come on the earth or in the air, or come in this ashram or some other ashram. You all will know if you meditate deeply.

What signs will he give the people to know that he is the Kalki Avatar?

He will come to all the ashrams and you can tell. That’s the way you will come to know.

Swamiji going into mahasamadhi through yoga nidra is like reading a book. You have read the whole book, you have come to the end, and the book reading is over. You are at a point where you have to close the book. There cannot be a difference between pure and impure.

I’m not sure I understand.

The point is to put a lot of people into meditation. Normally, not everybody is qualified to receive and do the meditation. But now that we coming to the end of Swamiji, he has to do it regardless whether people are pure or impure. He cannot be differentiating between good and bad people. He has to get everybody into meditation.

Is this a time in history when this needs to be done?

Yes. That responsibility has come to Swamiji.

Does this have to do with the danger we’re in, knowing more about science than spirituality?

The danger will automatically come. After that everything will be calm.

Is the future is predestined or variable? If we meditate more, can we can change the future.

It was not predestined. The people made it like that. It will happen and it is accelerating, but the intensity will come down if you all do meditation.

According to what I’ve read the safe thing to do is to sell everything and go to the mountains or forest and live there and keep some guns. What does Swami feel about people who do this? Will they be safe?

Why should you sell everything and go to the forest? How long are you going to stay there? Will you have more spirituality there in the mountains than you have here? If you run away like that, one thing you will find is that the family is not happy that you are not with them. Second, friends will be unhappy that you have left them. Third thing, you also will be worried and concerned about your friends and family. So your mind is always thinking about them and you will not be able to stay there. The fourth point is that instead of doing all this, if you can stay in your house with your family and with all your friends and instead do good meditation, then you will not be affected by the civil war or whatever. You don’t need to worry about anything at all if you do good meditation.

There have been many prophesies and people have drawn maps showing this part of the country will not exist in ten years. It will be destroyed. Unfortunately, we happen to live in one of those areas. So it is very much on people’s minds.

There will be a lot of damage, but you don’t need to worry about that. Your concern should be to do more meditation.

If we meditate well, will we get the necessary information if our lives are in danger, like there’s an earthquake?

Once you do the meditation, then you realize that you are the spirit. Once you realize that you are the spirit, you don’t need to worry about the world any more.

The end of the age was foretold eons ago.

This is not the final end. The whole world is not going to end. A lot of people are going to die, and then it will become calm and nice again.

If it is not the end, then it is the end of an age, the Kali Yuga?

This is not the end of the Kali Yuga.

It seems that this is sort of a new phase.

There will be a lot of destruction. Those who survive will have a lot of fear. They will turn towards God. The bad ones will get a lot of fear. Those who meditate, they won’t get any fear at all. Even if the bomb falls right beside them, they’re not afraid.

Why wouldn’t they have fear?

In meditation, how do you get fear?

It just comes.

In the good meditation you don’t know anything. You don’t notice it.

That’s pretty good meditation, and probably beyond my level, that’s for sure

Swamiji himself will put you into that.

Rama’s Army

Swamiji dropped his physical body so that he could complete his mission. Many years earlier, Swamiji confided to close devotees that only when he has left his body would his mission really become great. In the weeks before his mahasamadhi, Swamiji made many promises about what that mission would accomplish. He told devotees that within the next forty years, there will be a single spiritual tradition in the world, including India, America, the Near East, and Europe. There would be a common philosophy, which word Swamiji uses to refer to matters of spirituality. Swamiji is not starting a new religion, he said. Brahma, Vishnu and Maheshwara are not part of any Hindu religion. They belong to all the world. Then he predicted that before the forty years are complete, there will be statues of Swamiji throughout the world, just like the one planned for installation at the Guntur ashram and the murthy to be installed at the Adivarapupeta mahasamadhi on the occasion of his 60th birthday. Swamiji added that he and his devotees are working not for themselves, but so that people can come to know God.

In January of 1994, Sri Swamiji was answering the questions of devotees about a wide range of subjects. At one point he turned the conversation around and said, “Well I have answered all these questions for you. Now answer my question. Can you tell me why we all are here now?” The devotees gave various answers such as they love Swamiji, or they come for darshan, or they come for peace of mind, or they do not know where else to be, or the realization that such darshan was a privilege. Then Swamiji answered his own question as follows:

“There was Rama, Sita and Lakshman. They had come to the forest. Who was with them? They didn’t have anyone else with them. Anjaneya Swami came. Sugriva came. Vibhishana came. Some others came, and this way a group formed. It became a big force and it killed a mighty man, Ravanasura. They brought peace to the world. That is it. You all have come here from different directions to develop this.”

Sri Swamiji was referring to the beautiful story of the Ramayana which is well known to all Indians. Lord Rama was unjustly banished from his father’s Kingdom of Ayodhya. Only his wife Sita and brother Lakshman accompanied him to exile. They spent many years traveling throughout South India, often living in the forest. The powerful demon king of Sri Lanka, Ravana, kidnapped Sita and took her to his island fortress to have her as his wife. Lord Rama formed an army of devotees with which he attacked Sri Lanka, rescued his wife, and killed Ravanna. That army of devotees included Lord Hanuman (Anjaneya, a great and powerful god with the form of a monkey), Sugriva (the King of the monkeys), Jambavan (the king of the bears), and Vibhishana (the brother of Ravanna).

Ravana was considered the most powerful king of his time and feared by all the other kings and emperors. Yet this great king with his powerful armies was vanquished not by a powerful lord supported by a great force of warriors, but by a banished young prince with the support of the simple animals who had gathered around him. The suggestion is that although the group of people gathered for the mission may seem insignificant in the eyes of the world, they will still succeed.

In March of 1963, a small group of disciples set out from Adivarapupeta to begin Swamiji’s mission of sharing God’s love and blessings with people throughout India. This was the beginning of a mighty force which now includes disciples and devotees from all over the world. This force is still growing today. Sri Swamiji tells us that he has placed people throughout the world in positions to be able to help in his Divine mission. Now is the time when they can come forward and participate. We should start planning for it now, he says.

The great light that entered the womb of Sri Swamiji’s mother, the great light that inundated the Dhyana Mandir when Shivabalayogi successfully completed twelve years of intense tapas, and the light which came from the night sky into the Shivalingam of the Dhyana Mandir in the early morning of Sri Swamiji’s mahasamadhi are all the same Divine light which even today can be seen in Adivarapupeta. That Divine light can be seen wherever devotees open their hearts and minds to the ever-present and inexhaustible blessings of the Lord of Yogis, the loving and benevolent Universal Guru, Sri Sri Sri Shivabalayogi Maharaj.

We worship a Living God. We are guided and blessed by a Living Yogi. Sri Swamiji sends you his blessings.

Bangalore ashram, 1989.

Supplemental Introduction: Controversy and Bhava Samadhi

Aside from formatting and corrections, the introduction and chapters in this book are the same as that published by the Bangalore Trust in 1995. There was, however, more to the story.

The first draft, the one that was read to Swamiji in bhava on April 12, 1994, contained accounts of devotees’ carelessness and misconduct as explanations for why Shivabalayogi entered mahasamadhi. These were omitted from the 1995 edition. The second draft, ready by January of the following year, contained an additional chapter entitled Shakti Rupa, Swamiji’s Full Presence in a Physical Body, which described devotees’ experiences in the United States and England in late 1994. That chapter was also omitted.

Shivabalayogi undergoing dialysis treatment.

Controversial Material in the First Draft

The origin of this book is as described in the 1995 introduction. Two days after Shivabalayogi’s body was interred in the Adivarapupeta Samadhi, Sri Swamiji in bhava upon K. Yashoda asked me to put together a book on his mahasamadhi. Swamiji asked that the book contain different perspectives and theories and that it be ready within two weeks.

I had already been keeping detailed notes on what devotees had told me about Swamiji’s declining health, what I saw personally, and what others told me they saw over the weeks leading up to the mahasamadhi. That history suggested several broad, alternative themes to explain why Shivabalayogi dropped his physical body: devotees’ neglect and even intentional misconduct; Swamiji’s frustrations and disappointments with devotees; Swamiji’s neglect of his own body; and poor and delayed medical attention. Devotees familiar with the Bangalore ashram knew the incidents and the persons involved. After all, that was how I had learned about them in the first place.

Add to this mix of unpleasant reality was what Shivabalayogi had often told us in the United States about yogis. He would say that throughout history, we were constantly murdering yogis. Jesus was murdered, as was Mohammed and Buddha, he insisted. And to make the subject even more unpleasant, Shivabalayogi explained that the yogis were either murdered by some of their devotees (Mohammed and Buddha) or the devotees had the opportunity but failed to protect the yogi (Jesus).

The Mahasamadhi chapter of this book describes the night after Swamiji had almost died during his first dialysis in Kakinada. That night, Swamiji and a small group of devotees, including Mr. Gopanna, Jagadish and I, were sitting on the roof of Mr. Gopanna’s house, enjoying the cooler, evening air. I used the occasion to ask Swamiji whether, say with Jesus, the devotees really intended to kill their guru or whether it was more a matter of incredible stupidity. Jagadish smiled because he had just been talking with Swamiji about the same subject. I still wonder today how it was that about two weeks before his mahasamadhi, both Jagadish and I raised the same question on that same occasion. Maybe it was because Swamiji was so sick and weak and we both wondered whether, in some future incarnation of Shivabalayogi, he would blame us. Jagadish, like me, found it hard to believe that any devotee could turn against and kill their Master.

Swamiji insisted it was intentional. He had Jagadish explain to me, in considerable detail, the story of what had happened in Bangalore in August of 1991 when Swamiji took the homeopathic injection brought by two U.S. chiropractors. He was hospitalized with kidney failure. Swamiji had been surprised and disappointed that some of his devotees expected him to die and were making contingency plans. As Jagadish finished the story, Swamiji made a comment in Telugu with an intensity that suggested he was summarizing in a few sentences everything that Jagadish had said. Jagadish translated, “Devotees come close to the guru and get guru bhava. But some want to become like the guru, so they plan to get rid of the Guru.” Swamiji added in English, “Understand now?”

This conversation, what Swamiji had said in the U.S. about murdering yogis, and all the confusion surrounding the mahasamadhi were very fresh in my mind when Swamiji in bhava upon Yashoda asked for different people’s versions of what had happened. I scribbled notes, “different theories.” I told Swamiji that I had seen many unpleasant things over the weeks in Adivarapupeta, so I would be writing much that would be unpleasant and controversial. He said put it down. He would read the book and let me know which parts to take out.

The first draft was ready within two weeks. On the night of April 12, 1994, I read the draft to Swamiji, in bhava upon Yashoda, as described in the original introduction to this book. I summarized what I had written about Swamiji’s earlier life, how his body had suffered over the years, and different explanations why he had taken mahasamadhi. That material included Swamiji’s own disappointment with the conduct of his devotees. He had publically accused some devotees that they were interested only in being seen and recognized at the ashram. I had learned about an occasion when devotees used black magic to try to kill him. I was told that Swamiji had said, “What have I done to them that they do this to me?” There were incidents when trusted devotees solicited substantial donations from unsuspecting people saying that it was for Swamiji, then pocketed the money. There were two close disciples who, when Swamiji was perilously ill, asked him for his powers and the Trust property. The medical care he received was questionable: whether the injection that almost killed him or the frustrating delays of getting Swamiji proper medical attention during the last weeks and days. Then there was Kuwait. Swamiji was disappointed with his devotees’ lack of action when he was stuck in Kuwait.

Whatever I read, Sri Swamiji, in bhava samadhi on Yashoda, nodded as if approving.

There was a lot of controversial material in that first draft. There was ample reason to believe the truth of the nadis’ prophesies that Shivabalayogi would leave his body because of his frustrations with the ashram and devotees. That initial draft of The Living Yogi included descriptions of incidents that reflected poorly on some individuals who were known among devotees in India. Some of these same individuals wanted a voice in what was to happen with Swamiji’s Trust.

More people gathered to listen to the reading. Jagadish was translating my words into Telugu for Swamiji, so many who didn’t know English could understand the Telugu. I suspect someone informed two people at the ashram who had a keen interest in such matters. These two showed up. It didn’t take long before they had heard enough. They did not like the content. The trouble wasn’t what I had written, it was that it put them in bad light and they were interested in gaining control of the Bangalore Trust. Their motivations differed. One mostly had a sincere desire to protect the ashram from outsiders who saw only an opportunity to gain property for their own use. The other mostly wanted to gain the property.

They began shouting at Swamiji, in bhava upon Yashoda, and at me, mostly in the Telugu language that I didn’t understand. I did understand the rage in their faces and occasional hysterical lapses into English. One of them repeatedly accused me of being an American devil (rakshasa) who knew nothing and was simply making up stories. Swamiji tried to calm them down by saying that I had only written what I had seen and been told, but the yelling continued. The process was halted and I left. I actually feared for my personal safety.

Swamiji through bhava encouraged me to continue with my work of collecting information, writing, and editing, but I deleted or diluted material about devotees’ misconduct.

What remains, in my opinion, is a more accurate account of Shivabalayogi’s mahasamadhi than the original draft. Although there was some misconduct and some neglect, my own conclusion is that Swamiji’s body simply wore out. The role that devotees played is more a background to the mahasamadhi itself, and also a background to another story: what happened after the mahasamadhi.

Shakti Rupa: Shivabalayogi’s Full Presence in Bhava Samadhi

The Living Yogi is an attempt to explain why Shivabalayogi entered mahasamadhi. The story ought to convey some of the shock, confusion and all too human conduct that surrounded the mahasamadhi. We struggled to understand and explain how Swamiji’s mission would continue. There was a desperate desire for assurance, guidance and authority. One powerful source of direction came from bhava samadhi. There had already been almost three decades of experience with Swamiji’s presence in bhava samadhi, and the phenomenon continued after the mahasamadhi, arguably even more powerfully.

Over the days and weeks after the public reading of the first draft of The Living Yogi, Swamiji’s four Oregon trustees arrived in Bangalore, the Jata Samadhi was consecrated at the Bangalore ashram, we had conversations with Swamiji in bhava upon Mr. R. B. Singh in addition to Miss Yashoda. We five Americans visited Adivarapupeta, then Delhi and Dehradun. Two of the trustees and I continued to Agra to witness the bhava phenomenon that was the talk of Indian devotees: Mr. M. P. Singh.

Each Sunday, M. P. Singh would dress up like Shivabalayogi, go to the Agra ashram, sit on the dais next to a large photo of Shivabalayogi, and conduct the meditation and bhajan program in bhava samadhi. It was M. P. Singh who, after Swamiji’s mahasamadhi, coined the expression shakti rupa, “form of power,” to describe a very special form of bhava samadhi.

Towards the end of that same year, 1994, Swamiji’s two American trusts and Swamiji’s U.K. trust organized meditation and bhajan programs attended by Mr. R. B. Singh. We had not expected this, but beginning with the first program in Seattle, R. B. Singh showed up dressed like Shivabalayogi and in Swamiji’s bhava, just like M. P. Singh had been doing in Agra. Mr. R. B. Singh had brought an antelope skin with him, complete with two horns. The skin was placed down on an asana and that was where Mr. Singh would sit during the programs, usually to the side of a large photograph of Shivabalayogi. This ended up happening at all the programs on that tour.

I collected many devotees’ experiences from that tour, and we had many recorded conversations with Shivabalayogi through bhava samadhi — on Yashoda, M. P. Singh, R. B. Singh and other devotees. All this material became a new chapter entitled Shakti Rupa, Swamiji’s Full Presence in a Physical Body.

I returned to Bangalore in January of the following year, 1995. The plan was to have The Living Yogi published for the birthday function on January 24. As in the previous year, there was resistance to some of the material. This time, it had to do with the new Shakti Rupa chapter. By then, the new Bangalore management had established itself and they were concerned about the idea that trance-swamis spoke with Shivabalayogi’s authority. It could be a pretext for unscrupulous devotees to gain power.

It wasn’t just the trustees who had issues. Many devotees were skeptical about bhava samadhi, much less “shakti rupa,” the idea of a full and therefore infallible presence of Shivabalayogi. Some were deeply offended by the notion that a trance swami would act as if Shivabalayogi. For example, there was an incident at the Bangalore ashram when R. B. Singh returned after his U.S. and U.K. programs. In early January of 1995, R. B. Singh dressed up like Shivabalayogi and, apparently in Swamiji’s bhava as he had been for the U.S. and U.K. programs, he went inside the meditation hall and sat on his antelope-skin asana. He was badly roughed up by long time devotees who shoved him out of the hall.

A few weeks later, Mr. M. P. Singh was in Bangalore for the birthday function, January 24 of 1995, and there were several long meetings with Lakshmi Kantamma and other Bangalore trustees arguing over the content of the book. M. P. Singh, the originator of the shakti rupa concept and increasingly asserting himself as Shivabalayogi in a new body, tried to appease the Chairman, but to no avail. Tom was again told that he misunderstood and had to meditate and rewrite. Plus, the Shakti Rupa chapter was off limits. Behind Lakshmi Kantamma’s back, M. P. Singh winked at me and told me to write whatever I wanted. The reader will find references to shakti rupa, M. P. Singh and R. B. Singh in the 1995 Introduction. They were sneaked in.

We even argued over the title. The prior year, Swamiji in bhava on Yashoda had given the title of The Living Yogi, and that was the title on the manuscript I had brought with me. Someone suggested A Living Yogi and The Everlasting Yogi. M. P. Singh presided over the debate and finally weighed in on The Living Yogi as if he had come up with the title.

I returned to the U.S., made some more revisions, deleted the shakti rupa chapter, and mailed the result to Bangalore. It was published by the Bangalore Trust and presented to the public in Adivarapupeta on the first mahasamadhi anniversary, April 2, 1995, when M. P. Singh, in bhava, consecrated the marble statue of Shivabalayogi over the Samadhi.

What was published was a compromise that reflects the confusion among devotees after Sri Swamiji’s mahasamadhi, including my own. As events later turned out, it was a good thing to delete material promoting shakti rupa. It was wrong to suggest that bhava samadhi was “complete” on some people and therefore perfectly trustworthy. There was too much evidence of human frailties. The issue is not really whether Shivabalayogi is present in a person. Shivabalayogi is present in all devotees. The question is how much of the devotee’s own ego is left. If the ego of the devotee is not completely destroyed, there is no possibility of such a person being a perfect expression of divine consciousness.

After Shivabalayogi entered mahasamadhi, a few of his disciples claimed to have attained the state of perfect selflessness, whether through bhava samadhi or meditation or both. But the proof is in the conduct. Here is an explanation of one devotee who has experienced Shivabalayogi’s bhava samadhi often before and after Shivabalayogi’s mahasamadhi:

“The man in trance must be a perfect man. Otherwise, suppose trance comes and he misuses it. He starts making things and he tells something which is not correct, which is not actually from Swami but he himself creates. So the man on whom trance comes, we have to see the man’s life, the man’s morality, the man’s truthfulness, the man’s honesty. And if such a man is there in trance, I don’t think there is any problem in not believing. And normally if you see such a man, his trance will be baka. Baka means true. But if the man has got a defect, we know that he is a defective man, moral wise, truthful wise, honesty wise.”

Sathyaraju, Swamiji as a child and young teenager, had no desire to become a yogi or to attain any spiritual powers. He was simply fearless and intolerant of falsehood. These qualities alone set him apart from virtually all those who claim the privileges of enlightenment. Sathyaraju became Shivabalayogi by sitting in meditation for twelve years to completely destroy his ego. Shivabalayogi was radically different from ordinary people, not only because of his character and his intense spiritual austerities, but because of who he was and how he acted. It was not anything that he said. In three decades of public life, there is nothing to suggest that Shivabalayogi did anything for himself.

Shivabalayogi’s presence in bhava samadhi, whether before or after his mahasamadhi, is real. The experiences collected in the Shakti Rupa chapter are powerful evidence of the reality of that presence. The complete chapter is presented in this edition, only without the misleading title.

Were I to be writing The Living Yogi today, I would delete and re-write a lot more than what some of the Bangalore trustees had wanted. I would write about people blessed with bhava samadhi who claim the privileges of a yogi. I would write about the risks when profound spiritual experiences collide with human frailties. But then, if I were to write the book today, it would not as accurately reflect the profound loss that devotees experienced after Shivabalayogi’s mahasamadhi.

Thomas L. Palotas

Tucson, August 7, 2013

THE OMITTED CHAPTER

More Experiences with Bhava Samadhi

Sri Swamiji’s has been using his subtle bodies and bhava samadhi to give darshan, blessings and guidance through his devotees’ bodies since the early 1960’s. His astral presence would be available on certain individuals to converse with devotees, answer their questions, give instructions, respond miraculously to their prayers, bless vibhuti, and do anything else Swamiji normally would do through his physical presence. Many times Sri Swamiji in his own physical body would confirm his activities through such bhava.

One of the disciples who received Swamiji’s bhava in this way is M. P. Singh. In late 1992, Sri Swamiji gave instructions to M. P. Singh, either in his meditation or through bhava, that he should sit for a forty-five day tapas which Swamiji would perform through bhava upon him. This tapas in bhava and Mr. Singh’s subsequent visit to Bangalore are related in the earlier chapter on Swamiji’s mahasamadhi. What is relevant here is what Swamiji instructed Mr. Singh to do thereafter. He was to attend each Sunday’s meditation and bhajan program in Agra in Swamiji’s bhava. Sri Swamiji would come upon him, cause him to dress somewhat like Swamiji, then be driven to the Agra ashram where Shivabalayogi would give darshan in samadhi, bless vibhuti, initiate into meditation, and talk with devotees. Swamiji in his own body publicly announced that when he comes in such bhava, the full powers of his presence are there.

After Sri Swamiji dropped his physical body, his presence through bhava samadhi continued to be a common occurrence, even more than before. For example, in Bangalore for several weeks after his mahasamadhi, Swamiji came upon Miss K. Yashoda in bhava during the morning puja and sat with the devotees. Much of the morning Swamiji on Yashoda sat quietly inside the temple. He called all the devotees and asked each individually how he or she was and whether they had any questions. He knew all the devotees intimately and gave each personal reassurances. In the afternoon, Swamiji sat in the ashram garden and bhajans began spontaneously in his presence. Everybody who came got a drink of tender coconut water. In the evenings, Swamiji sat with the bhajan group in the meditation hall, sometimes directing which bhajan should be sung. At night, Swamiji attended the meetings where the trust work was discussed. Decisions were submitted for Swamiji’s approval and problems for his guidance. It was all unmistakably Swamiji. Significantly, Yashoda herself never dressed herself other than as Yashoda, and she never sat on a dais or even an asana.

Many devotees who were unfamiliar with Swamiji’s presence through bhava samadhi before his mahasamadhi were understandably skeptical about such continued presence afterwards. Some of us thought that although Swamiji continued to communicate through bhava samadhi, the presence was nothing as powerful as when he was in his own physical body. Others were even more skeptical. This was the background when Sri Swamiji asked the American devotees to organize a tour.

Through bhava on different occasions and upon four different people, Sri Swamiji asked the trustees of the Shivabalayogi trust of Oregon to organize programs in the U.S.A. to be attended by R. B. Singh and D. Jagadish Kumar. Despite considerable skepticism, the tour was organized. The first program took place in London. Sri Swamiji was already in bhava upon Mr. Singh when he arrived by car at the evening program. His body was dressed in the same way as Sri Swamiji, a kaupina (loin cloth) and a shawl draped around his body. The same thing happened at the first program in the United States, in Seattle on the 22nd of October, 1994.

We set up meditation and bhajan programs just like we did for Shivabalayogi. The only differences were that Swamiji was present only in bhava samadhi, and Mr. Singh was made to sit below and by the side of Swamiji’s own asana. We set up Sri Swamiji’s photograph on the asana where Swamiji used to sit. Sri Swamiji upon Mr. Singh received arthi and sat down below and by the side of that main asana. He applied vibhuti on the foreheads of the hosts who proceeded to initiate the new people. After the meditation, Sri Swamiji blessed vibhuti, then resumed meditation during the bhajans. Several devotees experienced bhava samadhi. After the arthi, Sri Swamiji gave individual darshan and blessings with Mr. Kumar translating because, although Mr. Singh knows English well, it was not Mr. Singh who was talking but Sri Swamiji himself and Swamiji speaks very little English.

People had wonderful experiences in meditation and were deeply affected by Shivabalayogi’s presence. Some who had known him in his own body were reduced to tears of recognition. As Sri Swamiji sat in the back of the car waiting to take him away, he handed out chocolates as prashad, just like he always used to do.

Everyone present was surprised, including Mr. Singh and Mr. Kumar who themselves were unsure about what would really happen on their visit to American cities.[63] Those of us who had organized the tour expected that Sri Swamiji probably would come in bhava sometime during the programs, talk with his devotees and reassure them of his presence. None of us expected Sri Swamiji to come in the same way as he used to, and sadly none of us ever again expected to experience the wonderful transforming power, loving personality and blessings we got through his physical presence. Yet here was Sri Swamiji’s very real darshan, in all ways identical to his earlier physical presence, only the outward physical form was different.

This amazing revelation repeated itself with each meditation program throughout the United States and England. Not only was Sri Swamiji’s darshan unchanged, he was giving bhava samadhi to devotees even more liberally than before. We had had almost no experience with bhava samadhi in the United States. During these programs, even some new people experienced bhava.

Sri Swamiji is continuing his mission of traveling around the world, initiating people into meditation, and giving spiritual experiences, only at a much accelerated rate. No longer limited by his own physical body, he is working through several different disciples simultaneously. The mind wants to reject the phenomenon, but experience proves it to be all very real. The phenomenon is something which must be experienced to be appreciated, and its power to transform is profound. As we actually experience Sri Swamiji’s full presence in shakti rupa,[64] we realize there is little difference between his presence in his own versus someone else’s physical body. If anything, the blessings through his shakti rupa are even more profound.

All the following experiences were with Sri Swamiji in full presence in bhava during this miracle 1994 U.S.A. tour.

—  —

I approached the phenomenon of bhava samadhi with great skepticism, having had quite a lot of prior and not always satisfying experience with people who channeled spirits. I dismissed it as not being integral to the path of meditation. I had already received Swamiji’s blessings in the physical and that was enough. Still, I went to one of the special programs in Seattle.

To my surprise, I was meditating during the bhajans and witnessed Swamiji’s bhava within me, a tangible bliss uniquely different from any other bliss I had experienced before. It started with an explosion of light, then bhava and loss of awareness of my physical surroundings. I felt a lot of spiritual energy moving through me.

The surprise was that Swamiji’s presence was the same if not greater than when I was in his physical presence during his 1991 visit to the U.S.A.

—  —

I had seen Sri Swamiji’s bhava in India and it did not feel the same as when I was with his physical body. When I was in his physical presence I would feel a tremendous amount of bliss. The surprise came for me during the special programs we had arranged in Seattle at Swamiji’s request after his mahasamadhi. During the second program, I closed my eyes and sat in meditation. I felt that I was sitting in Swamiji’s physical presence. My mind wanted to argue but I could not deny my own experience. I realized it was Swamiji just like before and I was filled with gratitude.

—  —

I was a little uncomfortable having to do the opening arthi at our first two Seattle programs. We had been careful to set up Swamiji’s picture on the asana which we used for him on previous visits. I was unsure about whether Swamiji would even come in bhava, but as we set up the hall I thought it prudent to set up a cushion next to and below the formal asana, just in case.

Although we had seen this in Agra, it still came as a surprise when Swamiji entered in bhava upon R. B. Singh, dressed like Swamiji and walking just like Swamiji. To whom should I do the arthi? I started with the photograph, feeling a little silly with Swamiji standing to the side. Then I did arthi to Swamiji in bhava upon Mr. Singh. The second night I again started with the photograph, but when I stepped to the side and did arthi to Sri Swamiji in bhava, I received a powerful wave of energy as a blessing. From then on, we had Sri Swamiji in bhava take his place in front of the formal asana and we did arthi to both simultaneously.

—  —

When we have weekly meditation and bhajans in Seattle, I usually light the camphor and begin the arthi to Swamiji’s picture after the bhajans. For the programs with R. B. Singh and Jagadish, we had set up the same picture of Swamiji prominently in front and the first two nights, R. B. Singh in bhava was sitting off to the right. The first night after the bhajans as I went up to light the camphor, it was Swamiji’s picture I had in mind for the arthi. I thought I would do arthi to the bhava in R. B. Singh almost as a courtesy.

It immediately became very clear to me that doing arthi to Swamiji in Singh was far stronger than doing arthi to the picture. I was completely surprised and overwhelmed by that realization. The picture had almost no power by comparison.

Many people told me they had similar experiences those first two nights when Sri Swamiji was sitting off to one side of his picture. They could feel the force field coming from R. B. Singh where Swami was in trance, rather than the picture directly in front.

—  —

As one of the people organizing the programs in North Carolina, I had a lot of skepticism and doubts. Who was this R. B. Singh who would preside over the programs? The first night I was very agitated and troubled. I did not like what I saw. But the second night I was so affected that when I went home I told my wife, “It’s Swamiji.”

The programs in North Carolina were wonderful. Many new people came for initiation and their first meditations with Sri Swamiji were powerful. By the third and fourth nights, many people were going into bhava samadhi during the bhajans. Some had been receiving his bhava before and others were attending his programs for the first time. All these years I had not cared very much for the bhajan portion of Swamiji’s programs. Now I was finding myself wanting the bhajans to continue on and on. The bhava was exciting for all those present.

—  —

The first time Swamiji came upon Singh in bhava, it was a wonderful meditation. I sat and meditated and immediately my spine straightened up and I felt a very powerful presence. It was very nice. The other nights were similar and there is a definite carry over to the weekly meetings, whether when we meditate or do the arthi to Swamiji. It seems to me and it seems to others as well that his presence is really strong. He is there.

My wife and I had occasion to drive R. B. Singh in Swamiji’s bhava for quite a distance to get him to one of the programs. Singh was in Swamiji’s bhava eight hours that day. We spoke with Swamiji while we were driving. I asked him about other yogis he might have been. I asked him about Ramakrishna, Sukadeva, Nityananda. “Why are you coming in bhava on R. B. Singh? If we prayed to Nityananda, would he come? Why are you doing this and why aren’t we seeing other yogis do this?”

He said, “If you pray to them and depending upon their preferences they might come and answer your prayer. But in my case my mission is not over. I have a mission to accomplish and that’s why I am doing this.”

I asked him, “Who I should pray to, Lord Shiva, you Swamiji, to God, or to whom?” He said “Who is it that came and gave you initiation?” “Well, You did” I responded. “Then you can pray to me.” He explained that the Guru and God are the same.

“Where are you? If you are coming in bhava on Singh, where are you the rest of the time?” He said, “Swamiji is in your heart.” He was really clear that to pray or contact God, Swamiji was that for us. Guru and God are the same as far as we were concerned.

I asked him what should I do to make sure that I would always have meditations as wonderful as in his presence? He said that I could do two things: sit for a while and repeat the mantra om shiva bala, om shiva bala or just repeat the mantra silently during daily activities. A little bit of that before dhyan may make for a deeper experience.

—  —

We had darshan of Sri Swamiji upon R. B. Singh the night before the first program. Swamiji asked whether we had any questions. I asked him whether now that he had dropped the physical body, was he working on many other planets and worlds. He said yes, but my real answer came the next night during meditation at the first program. Swamiji came and took me for a trip through the solar system. We visited many planets and he showed me the very living world inside the Sun. As if that was not intense enough, during the meditation at second night’s program, he again came and took me on an astral body tour of many worlds beyond our solar system and beyond our universe.

—  —

Our family pet rabbit has always been extremely healthy, yet it suddenly became very ill during the week we had programs with Swamiji. Our two young children were really worried, so my wife and I were too. The rabbit would not leave its cage. It didn’t eat anything for three days. We were really concerned that we were going to lose it.

That evening after the program I went up to Swamiji and I explained through his interpreter that our bunny was sick and we were really concerned about it. The interpreter smiled at my odd request, but when it was translated, Swamiji instantly looked very concerned. He asked for vibhuti, blessed it, and said to put the vibhuti in the bunny’s water and powder some of the vibhuti and sprinkle it over the bunny. I felt that he was totally sincere, and we were all taken aback.

We got home very late that night and I did as instructed. I put some vibhuti in the bunny’s drinking water and sprinkled vibhuti all over it. The following morning the bunny was completely well. It bounded out of its cage and was all around the house. It ravenously ate the food we put before it and has been well ever since.

My wife commented how funny for us to go before God to heal our bunny. The real purpose of what happened was much, much more. Our kids were so impressed by that miracle. Had they doubts whatsoever about Swamiji’s powers, they were dispelled by that one incident. At the very last program, both kids went up to Swamiji and all they had to say was thanks so much for healing the bunny.

—  —

It was halfway through our week of programs and a friend wanted to cook an eight course Indian meal for everyone. I woke up that morning and I was not feeling well at all. I thought this was poor timing, but everything already had been set into motion. My friend came and I had to work all morning helping him prepare all this food that we had gathered. People started coming. Maybe twenty people showed up and in the midst of it all my father showed up. It was mass chaos. At that point I was so sick, all I wanted to do was get away and go to bed. But there was no way out of it. I couldn’t eat anything despite the huge feast we had prepared. Everybody else enjoyed it.

I didn’t know how I was going to survive because we had three more nights of programs to do. I was responsible for getting everything set up for the programs the next three nights. That night I arrived early to set up at the house where Swamiji’s program was scheduled.

I am horribly allergic to cats. I quickly get an asthma attack so severe that I lose my ability to breathe. My chest gets congested to the stage where it is dangerous. When I walked into this house to set up, I found no less than a dozen cats. We had to do a program there and I had to move all the furniture and help set up the entire program. I just prayed. I had no reaction that night. I thought maybe that was because I was so sick that my immune system was not even responding.

Somehow I endured the meditation and during darshan I went up to Swamiji. I told him that I felt I was coming down with at least a five day flu in a big way. He told me that I was becoming very ill and I needed to be sustained so I could finish helping with the programs for the rest of the week. He gave me blessed vibhuti and told me to put it in hot water and drink it. The next morning, I took the vibhuti and put it in hot water. I drank it and I was well. More than well, I felt great. I never did get sick.

That next night we had to do another program at the house with a dozen cats. I was concerned about my allergic reaction, but there was no way out. We did that program and again I had no reaction to the cats.

We finished the week’s programs then drove to the next city to attend some more. There after the program I knew it was inevitable that we would spend some time in the evening at the house where Mr. Singh and Jagadish were staying. They have a cat there and every other time I’ve been there my allergic reaction flared up. So at that program on Saturday night, I asked Swamiji to help me make peace with cats, and he blessed some vibhuti and told me to just keep it in my pocket. That night I had a wonderful dinner and stayed long and talked for hours had no reaction at all to the cat.

—  —

At one of the programs, a song came to me as soon as the meditation started. It was a Native American song, like a chant. I thought, “Oh my God, I have to remember this.” I was preoccupied the whole meditation trying to remember the song. It’s very simple, but I knew that if I did not imprint it, I would lose it. I spent almost the entire meditation clinging on to this song.

I was driving Swamiji home that night after the program. I asked his interpreter, “In meditation tonight I received a song and I was just wondering if it was a good song.” He had only started to translate the question when Swamiji cut him off and said, “Yes, it is a good song and it is Native American. You may use it in the future.” I was blown away. It’s like he was just sitting there waiting for me to ask.

Then we got home. We got out and I followed behind him. It was raining and I was trying to hold an umbrella over him. We live on a house boat on a floating pier in the Willamette River near Portland. I got within two houses of our home on the floating walkway. I was right behind him. All of a sudden I was completely blinded by a vision. It seemed like we were out on the Great Plains in this country, a long time ago, sitting around a fire. We’re singing this song, and he’s there. He is one of the elders. It was so vivid, so real, and so intense that I almost fell into the river. When I came back, I saw him simply smiling and going into the house. It was incredible.

—  —

Two of Swamiji’s programs in Seattle were held at an Indian cultural center. Over the years, many Native American celebrations and rituals had been performed there. Swamiji’s programs at that center were extremely powerful. Some people said afterwards they had experiences specific to the Indian center. They felt the presence of other spirits who came out because of Swamiji’s presence and the meditation and bhajan programs.

During the bhajans on the second night there, I had a strange feeling of being compelled to look towards the front where Swamiji was seated in bhava upon Mr. Singh. Standing there was a huge being, thirteen or fourteen feet tall. She was about six feet in front of Swamiji, at his right hand, our left as we faced him. I thought she was Kali. She was tall and wearing a head dress, an eastern head dress with several tiers. I felt overwhelmed. Every once in a while she would reach out and send some energy directly. It was too much, so much energy that I didn’t like it. I said thank you, no. It was sending shock waves through my body. An incredible amount of energy. She was happy to be there. She wasn’t threatening by any means. She was just dancing to the music. She was there for quite a while.

I thought maybe it was just my imagination. But then later on that night we had darshan of Swamiji at the house where Jagadish and Mr. Singh were staying. He was asked questions about photographs taken of lights, and Swamiji said that the lights were Parvati and Shiva. He said they were both at the program earlier that night.

—  —

Our neighbors had seen us coming and going with Swamiji in bhava upon Singh. Their young daughter asked her parents whether we were just pretending. Her father said that was Shivabalayogi and her mom said some people really believe that. When her parents mentioned this to me, I told them that’s true. What I got from this whole experience is that it didn’t really matter. It was so much fun and so incredible. It didn’t matter who believed what. It was such an incredible thing, such a great excuse to do something like that which we just wouldn’t have done otherwise.

The bottom line for a lot of us was the meditation and not the mannerisms or how he acted like Swamiji or sounded like Swamiji. Bottom line was your experience, the quality of the silence. I’m telling you that people had major experiences. I heard about them afterwards. People were so affected.

My work partner and his special lady friend came to one of the programs. He had seen Swamiji before, but she was new. They were both profoundly affected by Swamiji’s darshan through Singh. Later that night, she woke up in the middle of her sleep shouting his name, “Shivabalayogi, Shivabalayogi.”

One man who came had grown up in the United States but in the Eastern tradition. He had a lot of problems with that. He said that when he sat down and the instant the meditation started he was out of the body. During the meditation, Swamiji did an incredible healing on him and explained all the doubts and questions about the religious traditions which had troubled the man. He was profoundly affected by it. Swamiji healed his mind in a major way.

Many people had the experience of feeling as if Swamiji were meditating for them. They could feel a pull towards the spot between their eyebrows. It was wonderful. One man described his experience as being in Shangri-la. In the meditation and the whole environment, he felt as if he had come to a wonderful, special place.

—  —

Swamiji gave me a blessing at the end of the program in Hood River, Oregon. He said he was very pleased with the programs arranged with Singh and Jagadish. I told him about the skepticism we had encountered trying to put the tour together. Some devotees who in the past had hosted Sri Swamiji and received so many of his blessings were unwilling to even consider arranging for these programs.

Swamiji said that if people have doubts they should meditate. All their doubts will be resolved if they meditate. “From where does doubt come?” He asked. Another devotee replied from the lack of meditation. Swamiji repeated the question. This time the devotee replied from the mind. Swamiji responded, “Yes. It is the very nature of the mind to doubt. That is why we must meditate to control the mind. If people experience Swamiji at these programs,” he told us, “they will come to understand.”

GLOSSARY

A book about an Indian yogi unavoidably uses words, mostly Sanskrit based, which may be new to some readers. An effort has been made to keep the use of such words to a minimum, but the following words are often used throughout this book.

arthi — burning camphor in worship.

ashram — the guru’s residence, so a place set aside for devotees’ spiritual pursuits.

bhajans — songs of worship.

bhava, bhava samadhi — various levels of spiritual consciousness produced by the presence of divine beings; refer to chapter 3.

darshan — the blessings of seeing and being in the presence of someone or something very holy.

dhyana — one pointed meditation without object, the meditation technique which Sri Swamiji gives during initiation.

Dhyana Mandir — literally, meditation temple; the small structure built to protect Sri Swamiji during His tapas in Adivarapupeta and recently torn down with the construction of the new temple.

kirtan — word used in North India to describe a gathering to sing bhajans.

kundalini — powerful spiritual energy located at the base of the spine. As it ascends the body, one attains samadhi.

maha — prefix meaning great.

mahasamadhi — the final samadhi in which the yogi’s soul permanently leaves the physical body; in addition, the word refers to the place where the yogi’s body is interred and the rituals surrounding the interment.

nadis — any of several ancient prophesies of individual’s lives and events through the ages, past present and future.

namaskar — palms open and joined together as a form of greeting

pranam — a reverent namaskar done to one who is a superior or holy.

puja — worship ceremonies typically involving offerings of flowers, water, food and the like.

prashad — food which has become blessed.

rishi — a sage; i.e. a yogi.

sadhu — an ascetic, one who has renounced worldly possessions and attachments.

samadhi — advanced states of spiritual consciousness in which the mind is still.

shakti — spiritual energy or power

shakti rupa — form of power, an expression Sri Swamiji is using to describe His continued full presence through bhava samadhi.

Shivalinga — a rounded stone which represents the cosmic soul, Lord Shiva or the Holy Spirit.

tapas — meditation in samadhi for at least twelve consecutive hours every day until God or Self realization is attained.

tapas shakti — the spiritual powers attained through tapas.

Telugu — Sri Swamiji’s native language which is spoken in the state of Andhra Pradesh.

vibhuti — ash; ash which Sri Swamiji has imbued with His spiritual powers and blessings.

yoga nidra – yogic sleep; a yogi’s continued intention to retain consciousness and activity in the physical world

yogi — as Sri Swamiji uses the word, one who has attained Self realization through the successful completion of tapas.

yuga — vast period of time. Of the four ages of Indian tradition, the Kali Yuga is the most backwards.

THE END

“There are certain true trances, but there are certain people who are not in trance.”

“How do we find out?”

“You watch their behavior and from that you will come to know whether it is true or not.”

[1] The garland of Sri Swamiji’s one hundred and eight names was composed separately by two different devotees in bhava samadhi. There are some differences between the two lists of mantras or names of worship to His Holiness. This list is the one from Sri Swamiji’s native region, Andhra Pradesh, where in Adivarapupeta, children are taught to memorize this wonderful prayer. The corrections, translations and explanations are through the help of Dr. D. Sivarajeshwari Devi, Mr. D. Jagadish Kumar, Dr. P. N. Murthy, and Sri. Shrinivasa Diksheetar (Seenu).

[2] Lord Ganesha is the elephant-headed god whom even the gods worship before undertaking anything important. The ganas are the various categories into which creation is differentiated. Ganesha is the Lord (Pati) of Creation or “Ganapati.” The child yogi (balayogi) Sanaka is responsible for taking care of the universe in this vast cycle of creation and dissolution, and Lord Sanaka keeps incarnating over and over again for this purpose. His first incarnation is Ganesha and his most recent Shivabalayogi.

[3] Vishnu means one whose body is white, i.e. the soul or astral body. Although it is also Lord Vishnu’s name, here the word refers to Ganesha. Sri Swamiji explained his name Shivabalayogi as meaning yogi dedicated to Lord Shiva and Goddess Parvati (Bala). The name given to him was Shivabalayogishawara (Lord of Yogis Devoted to Shiva and Parvati) but Sri Swamiji shortened it to avoid confusion with Ishwara (Lord), a name of God. See the footnote to the thirteenth mantra.

[4] Indra means god or king, so Shivabalayogindra means that Sri Swamiji is the King of yogis.

[5] Parabrahma is the name used in the Vedas, the most ancient scriptures, to identify the Ultimate Truth.

[6] Apara is the created universe which is visible to the physical eyes. Isha means lord. Aparaisha is the Lord of Creation and is also one of Lord Shiva’s many names.

[7] Literally, the one who is disciplined in yoga. One whose mind is in yoga is aware of Self, the Ultimate Truth.

[8] Sarva means all, bhoota means living beings, and indriya refers to organs. Swamiji tells us “Swamiji your mind. Swamiji your heart. Swamiji your body.”

[9] Swarupa means form and Ardhanarishwara means both Lord Shiva and Goddess Parvati together in one form. Seenu tells a story which helps explain the significance:

In May of 1977, Sri Swamiji was staying at the Dehradun ashram when the ashram secretary came to take some photographs. Swamiji put on his “tiger coat” made of velvet with a tiger skin pattern and posed with the sword presented to him by R. N. Singh Deo, the Maharaja of Patna. After some time, Sri Swamiji suddenly asked the secretary, “You have been taking pictures of Swamiji for many years. What have you observed about the features of my body?” None of the devotees present could answer. Sri Swamiji removed his coat and sat on the dais wearing only a loin cloth. He asked the secretary to take photographs from the right and the left. Then Sri Swamiji told the devotees how Goddess Parvati dwells in the right portion of his body and Lord Shankara in the left. He showed all the features of a woman on the right side including the eye and breast. Even his right hand was slightly smaller than the right. He made us touch his hands and feet. His left side was very soft and the right tough and strong.

When Lord Shiva and Goddess Parvati appeared to the Balayogi at the end of his twelve year tapas, They told him that he will be known to his devotees in the form of Ardhanarishwara. The name Shivabalayogi means the same. Shiva is Lord Shiva and Bala is one of the many names of Goddess Parvati. Yogi refers to Sri Swamiji. Hence Sri Swamiji’s Divine parents gave him the name Shivabalayogishwara (ishwara means lord), but Sri Swamiji kept only “Shivabalayogi.” That is Sri Swamiji’s greatness.

[10] Literally, salutations to the lotus posture. If the mantra is changed to “Aum Padmasanaulankritaya namaha,” the meaning would be salutations to the One Who is adorned in the lotus posture. Many people relate visions of seeing Sri Swamiji meditating in the lotus posture.

[11] The meaning of “Tarakayoga” is somewhat obscure. Sri Swamiji once said that Tarakayoga is the union of Lord Shiva with Lord Rama, hence this translation. It could also be translated as the giver of the bliss of salvation.

[12] The Vedas are ancient scriptures which represent the science of knowledge.

[13] The three gunas or qualities are rajas (the active principle), tamas (the passive principle) and sattva (the principle of balance). These three qualities are said to underlie all creation and unless one has attained God realization, one remains subject to their influences.

[14] Yantra means machine or can refer to the symbols or diagrams used in mysticism. Vidharayana refers to adornment or embodiment. In this mantra, machine or yantra suggests the working force of the Universe.

[15] In the 55th verse of the second chapter of the Bhagavad Gita, Lord Krishna answers Arjuna’s question about who is the sthitha pragma, the stable minded one. Lord Krishna replied that one is stable minded when one has thoroughly abandoned all cravings of the mind and is completely satisfied in the joy of the Self. Such a man or woman is stable minded and has realized the Soul.

[16] Sri Shivabalayogi teaches dhyana meditation which involves focusing the concentration without any object, whether a mantra, the breath or a form of God.

[17] There are several nadis or prophesies. each named after the rishi or sage who pronounced them many thousands of years ago. The sages’ descriptions of future lives and events were recorded by their disciples and these writings have been preserved through the ages, often within a family over many generations. The quality and accuracy of the readings depend upon how well the original writings have been preserved and transcribed over the years and the ability of the reader to understand the ancient script and language

[18] Lord Shiva is God the Holy Spirit and Sri Shivabalayogi’s Divine Guru.

[19] The fratricidal battle of Kurukshetra between the Pandava and the Kaurava forces is the background to the Bhagavad Gita, that part of the Mahabharata in which Krishna admonishes Arjuna to engage in the battle and teaches him about Self realization. The carnage in that battle was enormous.

[20] A name of Lord Shiva meaning “Bestower-of-Peace.”

[21] The Divine Mother is worshipped as the wife or feminine aspect of Lord Shiva. Shivabalayogi’s first incarnation is as Ganesha, the son of Sati, Lord Shiva’s spouse. Therefore, Kumarswamy (also known as Subramanyan) is the brother of Ganesha who is Shivabalayogi.

[22] A reference to Shivalingas, rounded stones which represent the Divine Soul, Lord Shiva. The reference is also to stone idols such as the deities which Shivabalayogi consecrates, thereby attaching a divine soul to the stone image.

[23] During periods of over population, Lord Yama, the God of Death, is said to be resting.

[24] Shivabalayogi typically refers to himself simply as “Swami” or “Swamiji,” which is also how his devotees affectionately refer to him.

[25] Shivabalayogi’s nadis list Paramahansa Ramakrishna as a prior life. Ramakrishna’s nadis list over a hundred prior lives, including Jesus and Mohammed. To some devotees he acknowledged being Buddha, but at other limes he said Buddha is an incarnation of Lord Vishnu. Sri Swamiji would often refer devotees to this list of prior births in Ramakrishna’s nadis.

[26] Ganesha is usually known as the son of Goddess Parvati. Sri Swamiji would correct devotees and say that Ganesha’s mother was Sati, the incarnation of the Divine Mother before Her incarnation as Parvati.

[27] Tapaswiji Maharaj was the great yogi who visited Swamiji during the first year of his tapas and instructed his mother and devotees on how to take care of the boy yogi. The Balayogi promised to visit Tapaswiji's ashrams after completing tapas.

[28] Shivabalayogi continued meditating in samadhi even after completing twelve years of tapas.

[29] A mutt is the residence of a religious leader (mathadipathy). Devotees and students may stay at the mutt to learn about spiritual life and practice.

[30] With legs crossed in the lotus position.

[31] The Ishtadeva (“chosen deity”) is the form or aspect of Divinity which an individual prefers to worship. Samskaras are our latent tendencies which result from actions in this and prior lives.

[32] Poonaka is the Telugu word for bhava samadhi, which is spiritual trance or rapture. Sri Swamiji explains that bhava samadhi comes from the presence of the astral or subtle bodies of divine beings. Through Sri Swamiji’s blessings, these divine spirits enter the devotees’ bodies for their spiritual development and bliss. There was an older man who regularly came to the Bangalore ashram and see visions of the Gods dancing with the people in bhava. When the person was in the bhava of Lord Krishna, the old man would see Lord Krishna dancing. When the bhava of Lord Rama, he would see Lord Rama dancing. Bhava samadhi has always been a common phenomenon during bhajans sung in honor of Sri Swamiji.

[33] Curiously, Sri Swamiji never claimed responsibility for bhava samadhi even though it is obvious that much of the bhava samadhi was from the presence of his own subtle body.

[34] This is the only temple in the world in which all three aspects of God are worshipped, the Creator, the Sustainer and the Destroyer. For millennia, Indian spiritual tradition has forbidden the worship of Brahma, the Creator, but Sri Swamiji explained that he came to lift that curse. With the planned consecration of Brahma, Vishnu and Maheshwara deities in Adivarapupeta, that temple will be the second where all three Gods are worshipped.

[35] Mahasamadhi is the process through which yogis finally leave their bodies. The word also refers to the rites performed to inter the yogi’s body. Finally, the Mahasamadhi is the shrine where the holy body is buried. As explained more fully later in this book, His Holiness went into yoga nidra on the 28th of March and Mahasamadhi on the 2nd or April.

[36] Within the first year of tapas, his body had grown so stiff from the twenty-three hour a day meditation that the Balayogi could not bend or move his limbs. Although medicines prepared by Tapaswiji helped, the Balayogi’s body remained crippled until June of 1953 when his Guru, Lord Shiva, miraculously cured all but his hands. Swamiji told devotees that Shiva said He would restore the hands also, but only if Swamiji needed them. Swamiji never asked and devotees who served him closely report that Swamiji was never bothered at all by his permanently bent fingers.

[37] The devotee is Mrs. Krishna whose mother was the Maharani of Patna, Srimati Kailas Kumari Devi, known as Swamiji’s beloved other mother, Mataji. The nadis contain entries about many close devotees of Swamiji. and often the devotee’s nadis contain as much information about Shivabalayogi as the devotee. In Mataji’s nadis, it is written that Sri Swamiji might leave his body in his fifty-seventh or fifty-ninth year. Swamiji was fifty-nine when he dropped the physical body.

[38] One week later when he was asked what he had acquired through tapas, Sri Swamiji opened the shawl wrapped around him to reveal his body naked except for a loin cloth, “Swamiji has a loin cloth, That is all. He doesn’t have anything.”

[39] Swamiji’s chronic anemia was related to his kidney failure and fool infection. He was receiving a rare and expensive blood product from the United Stales which helped keep his hemoglobin count up. However, this medicine had to be kept carefully refrigerated, so it was decided to rely on blood transfusions during this trip to Adivarapupeta rather than risk spoiling the difficult to replace medicine. Fortunately, Kakinada had an excellent and safe blood supply, which contributed to Swamiji’s assurance that he could stay there safely for several months.

[40] For more on this evening’s conversation with Sri Swamiji, see the Supplemental Introduction.

[41] [Before he left for Adivarapupeta for the last time, Shivabalayogi had laid the foundation for a Sati temple at the Bangalore ashram. It was to have been constructed by the Jhun Jhun Walas, a community of businessmen whose origins are in Gujarat. The events following Sri Swamiji’s mahasamadhi made the Jhun Jhun Walas give up on their plans. TLP 2013.]

[42] Swamiji’s devotees completed the enclosure of the sanctum sanctorum in three months, in time for its dedication on the 7th of August, 1994, as Swamiji wished. The temple is still under construction. The first phase includes the sanctum sanctorum, its 45 foot high gopuram or dome, and the roof slab which covers the entire 86 feet long and 46 feet wide structure. As donations are received from around the world, the remaining marble and tile work and the installation of different statues of Sri Swamiji will be completed. At Sri Swamiji’s continued instructions, twelve statues of him, one depicting each year of his tapas, will be installed in the temple. The temple also will have statues of the Gods Shiva, Parvati, Vishnu, Parvati, Lakshmi, Brahma, Saraswati, Ganesha, Subramanyan and Nandi. Finally, Sri Swamiji has instructed his devotees to install statues of his previous incarnations, including Jesus, Buddha and Mohammed.

Adivarapupeta ashram is where his holy body is interred in the Mahasamadhi and where the Shivalingam and Devi in the temple hold all the spiritual blessings and powers he attained upon completion of twelve years of tapas. He tells us that Adivarapupeta will become a place for pilgrimage as great as Benares (Kashi) on the Ganges River.

In addition to the temple, work is underway to construct the first of many buildings to accommodate and cook for the many thousands of travelers expected to visit the holy site over the next few years. But for now, the fortunate pilgrim who makes the effort to reach this out-of-the-way South Indian village will be richly rewarded not only with Sri Swamiji’s spiritual blessings, but the beautiful and simple rural setting of this wonderful place.

[43] After his mahasamadhi. Sri Swamiji explained that the pain resulted from his having suppressed the kundalini in his body for the previous six months. The kundalini is a spiritual power at the base of the spine. Normally dormant, it ascends to the top of the head during samadhi.

[44] Shambhu (“Abode of Peace”), Shankara (“Bestower of Peace”), and Parameshwara (Great or First God) are names of Shiva. God the Holy Spirit. Tandri means father.

[45] Lord Shiva often appears smeared with ash or vibhuti. When Sri Swamiji would take His devotees from the Bangalore ashram on an outing, He would usually be in His car with the devotees following in the van. Nandi is the great bull which is Lord Shiva’s vehicle. It appears that to compensate this lady for forsaking her planned pilgrimage to take care of another devotee, Sri Swamiji took her on a pilgrimage to the real thing.

[46] Hanuman is Lord Rama’s greatest and foremost devotee.

[47] The long jata is being kept in a glass case on Sri Swamiji’s asana (seat) in the meditation hall at the Bangalore ashram. Several small pieces of Swamiji’s hair were cut before His body was interred in the Mahasamadhi in Adivarapupeta. One of these small jata locks of hair is interred in the Mahasamadhi in Bangalore.

[48] The purnahuti is the climax of a fire sacrifice (homa) when the offerings, different kinds of food and sometimes valuables, are thrown in to be consumed by the fire. Sri Swamiji would always hold the offerings and with the help of as many devotees who could reach the large plate, would throw them into the fire pit.

[49] The name of this mantra or prayer means victory over death. Om Trayambhakam yajamahe sugandhim pushti vardhanam urvaarukamiva bandhanaam mrityor muksheeya maamritaat. “I pray (or meditate) upon the Three-Eyed Lord (Shiva) Who gives strength and fragrance ever-increasing. Save me from all the bondages of death like a cucumber (which when ripe naturally separates itself from the vine), but not from eternity (or Divinity).”

[50] Breathing life into an idol or, in this case, the temple.

[51] When Sri Swamiji completed tapas, he received blessings from both Shiva and Parvati. They both appeared before him and gave Their power to his body so that he could do the work. Now that His body has completed its work, he has given its power back to the Shivalingam and the idol of Devi (Parvati).

[52] Swamiji provided some tangible evidence that his soul was present. It is the photograph which shows his astral body in the form of a white light.

[53] Adinarayana was Sri Swamiji’s secretary for many years and personally served Sri Swamiji in many ways. Adinarayana arranged for Sri Swamiji’s all-India tours, corresponded for him, and was beloved by all devotees for his tireless and selfless work and the ever present personal kindness he radiated. Adinarayana complained of some chest pain, then suddenly suffered a fatal heart attack in Sri Swamiji’s presence.

[54] The consecration of the foundation.

[55] Coincidently, 147 was the flight number of the British Airways 747 which carried Swamiji to Kuwait and was captured by the Iraqis.

[56] We know of two messages through trance that Swamiji was not dead but had gone into yoga nidra. Both messages came immediately upon Swamiji leaving his body at 1:47 p.m. on Monday, March 28. The third message or “indication” to which Swamiji refers is unknown to the author.

[57] Several army officers used to join together to give Swamiji’s daily massage in Dehradun. They were quite strong, so the massage was very hard. Most people would have found such a massage very painful. Almost immediately, Swamiji would start snoring. One officer used to bombard Swamiji with a lot of questions, and even though Swamiji was snoring with eyes half closed, Swamiji would continue to answer.

[58] The nadis’ reference to the Battle of Kurukshetra appears towards the beginning of Chapter 2.

[59] A mutt is a religious organization.

[60] The significance is that devotees used to look for Sri Swamiji wherever his physical body happened to be, usually at the Bangalore ashram. Now he can be in a physical form (through shakti rupa) in many places simulatneously.

[61] Shakti is the Divine Power and is considered to be feminine.

[62] Putting life into the idol by attaching an astral body to the physical form.

[63] [A little more detail: R. B. Singh had told Jagadish that he had received instructions from Swamiji to buy the cloth for the kaupinams and the shawls. He wasn’t told anything else, but the purpose was obvious to Jagadish. R. B. Singh did not know how to wear the kaupinam, so Jagadish had to teach him just before the first program in England mentioned above. R. B. Singh, before he went into trance, was very shy when Jagadish tried to demonstrate how the kaupinam is worn. He could not bear Jagadish looking at him in only his underwear. Swamiji was never shy. TLP, 2013]

[64] Sri Shivabalayogi’s subtle bodies give bhava samadhi in may different ways and degrees and for many different purposes. Sri Swamiji uses the terms shakti rupa (energy form) and bhava samadhi interchangeably to refer to a broad range of spiritual phenomena. However, there are times when Sri Swamiji will come upon certain devotees, dress like Swamiji, and conduct meditation and bhajan programs or give darshan in exactly the same manner as Sri Swamiji used to in his own physical body. On such occasions, Sri Swamiji’s presence is very much the same as when he was in his own physical body. [Correction: Only M.P. Singh used the term shakti rupa. TLP, 2013]

Table of Contents

THE LIVING YOGI Sri Sri Sri Shivabalayogi Maharaj with the chapter omitted from the original publication

THE OMITTED CHAPTER More Experiences with Bhava Samadhi

Forwards by Bangalore Trustees

Author’s Introduction

A Garland of 108 Names

The Life of Shivabalayogi

Mahasamadhi

I Am with You Always (Devotees’ Experiences since the Mahasamadhi)

Darshan (Conversations with Sri Swamiji through Bhava Samadhi)

Supplemental Introduction: Controversy and Bhava Samadhi

The Omitted Chapter: More Experiences with Bhava Samadhi

Glossary

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